<p>DD started college in 2008 and DS is a sophomore this year. So we got three years down and three more to go. This is our half time, and I need some positive pep talk. </p>
<p>While we are very fortunate to have extremely generous FA from both schools, it has been very difficult for us. From just one bill to two of them made it harder. Looking forward, it will be even more challenging. We expect next years one bill will be higher than current two bills. </p>
<p>We love our kids and will do all we could to help them getting through this period. Our wonderful kids are doing their parts by having multiple jobs to support themselves. So I am confident that we are going to make it. At this moment, it is just so depressing knowing we still have a long way to go. The 2% down market makes you wonder if we would ever be able to catch on funding our retirement. </p>
<p>I know there are many CC families are or have been paying for multiple college bills. Please share with me how do you do it. Any tips to make things less depressing will be greatly appreciated.</p>
<p>I believe the term “sacrifice” will be part of most replies. In today’s environment, it seems that the best cure to depression from college bills is to emulate ostriches. </p>
<p>On the other hand, think that it could be worse, namely NOT being able to find a way to send those checks out. </p>
<p>However, I think that one balm to your financial suffering will come through the eternal gratitude of your children for having offered them every opportunity in a time of crisis.</p>
<p>This is what we’re hearing from our 3 graduates ('05, '07, '11) from private colleges. More than what they say to us, in a phrase here or there (not a love letter), we SEE. We see that their social lives are full of educated and resourceful friends from college. Those circles are now augmented by new friends met since college from their places of employment. They pick those with something to offer. The backgrounds of their post-college friends are much wider than just private/elite colleges. They meet new folks based on extensions of the endeavors/activities/interests that evolved during college. </p>
<p>All this gives us a lot of personal satisfaction as parents.</p>
<p>You are setting them up for life. It’s something to consider in the dark moments of pulling in a belt that seems to have no more notches.</p>
<p>Ahhhh… and just when cc was getting kinda quiet, a Dad II thread to the rescue!
Did you pull out some cash when you refinanced and gloated about the low interest rate, low refi cost and increased value of your house? Maybe you can sell some of your shares of company stock that you gloated about when the value jumped recently? The possibilites are endless.</p>
<p>Lots of great suggestions here, dadII. You mentioned elsewhere
With that amount of aid, your out of pocket expenses must be very small. Maybe you could meet with a financial planner to look at your net worth and expenses and see what you can do differently. Maybe your wife can get a fulltime job .</p>
<p>Selling extraneous household goods on ebay/Amazon/Craigslist. Electronics, like cameras, etc, often sell well. If you are knowledgeable about them, perhaps you could buy them, clean them up and flip them for a profit?</p>
<p>Selling a new car and riding a new high end bicycle might also be an option. New running shoes should make the pedaling a breeze. Selling a set of vintage corningware corelle dishes might also bring in some cash.</p>
<p>Sell your fancy SUV and buy a beater. Buy your groceries at Aldi, your staples at the dollar store your clothes at Goodwill. No more meals out, except for special occasions. Turn off the AC. Turn the heat down to 55 and wear sweaters. Cancel the cable TV. Cancel the high speed Internet and use the library’s. Cancel the cell phone, get a prepaid and use it only for emergencies. Etc. There are a lot of us out here who live this way, and you’d be surprised how quickly you can adapt. </p>
<p>Oh, and count your blessings - that you don’t live in Somalia or Haiti or Rwanda.</p>
<p>To give a serious reply (whether or not deserved), I have given up thinking so much about retirement. Yes, we are still funding the 401K, but not the absolute max at the moment. My firm keeps upping the “mandatory” retirement age. Once I started staring the empty nest in the face, I realized that I might as well work for some time to come. It’s not as if I was really going to write a novel or join the Peace Corps when I retired. If I need to work a few more years, so be it.</p>
<p>I mean this kindly, but be very thankful your kids are capable of going to college. Our son had to fly home Wednesday because his mental illness made it impossible for him to continue. We’re going to receive a complete refund of his semester’s tuition. I will be sad when that check comes in the mail. We’re hoping he can continue at our local college in the spring or next fall, but it will be a struggle for him.</p>
<p>Mainelonghorn, I’ve made similar comments on the '11 thread as we talk about how sad it is to leave our kids at school. Yes, it made me sad to leave D at college…but it makes me even sadder to have Son ('09) at home.</p>
<p>Maine, you brought tears to my eyes. S1 and S2 really struggled at different points during college years and S2 had a pretty dire first semester. Hugs and empathy to you. Hang in there. I hope it gets better for your S and family and he can continue his schooling at some point in the future.</p>
<p>Dad–I’m not going to bash on you like others posters like to do. I don’t know you. However,…S1 had a full-tuition outside merit scholarship to a T20 school. There are a lot of parents struggling mightily and sacrificing heavily to send kids to school. There wasn’t a day in the last 4 years I didn’t feel blessed and incredibly grateful for him to have received this gift. </p>
<p>You too are in a very enviable position of having very good financial aid. I’m guessing it sort of sticks in the craw of many posters who have it much worse and get by with much less. Having said that, everyone views their own financial struggles differently. My grandfather left me with many pearls of wisdom, one of which was “know the difference between a want and a need.” My kids didn’t like it so much as teenagers. Now, as young adults, they can see it is indeed a very valuable statement.</p>