<p>Did he not apply to any less selective LACs that might give him merit money? There’s a lot of space between ASU and Lawrence.</p>
<p>I would say take the scholarship and give Barrett a try. That’s a lot of $$ on the table. My S1 took a fullride to a big state u. We told him any funds left in his college savings acct. would be his upon graduation. He was very happy to graduate debt free and have a healthy savings account to start his life. And he loved his big state u.</p>
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<p>Exactly. If he had FA offers from the LACs that would not be there for a transfer student, then I would hesitate to give it up. I would also hesitate if he were looking at an acceptance at something on the Ivy level where transfers are insanely difficult. (I don’t know what the transfer odds are at Wes, admittedly.) As it is, he can try Barrett, save a lot of money, keep his grades up, and if he really doesn’t like it transfer to a smaller school.</p>
<p>There must be some reason why he applied to ASU in the first place…</p>
<p>celesteroberts posts a lot of great info about barrett…I think I saw her responding just today to one. PS it’s 80 hre today!</p>
<p>I am sending you a PM with specifics. I think a Barrett full ride is a fantastic opportunity.</p>
<p>This is all very helpful. We applied to ASU late in the game after waking up in a cold sweat many nights. If he were more directed and aggressive, i would feel AS BAD about spending the fortune but he’s a typical 18 year old boy. Another consideration is that he may end up doing something like a Philosophy PHD (he’s the type). He could use the college $$ to put a down payment on a house and pursue non-lucrative interests. I think that a lot of kids have this opportunity taken away by loans. </p>
<p>You haven’t answered the question about Lawrence… it would be very unusual for a kid to be admitted to Wes, yet get no merit at Lawrence (which is ranked quite a bit lower and offers decent merit aid). Was he shut out of merit aid at Lawrence? Also, was he NMF (which adds a couple thousand a year of merit at Lawrence to whatever he may have been offered0? Because that can all give you an option in the middle of full pay at Wes and free ride at ASU.</p>
<p>yes, in fact he got $16,000 a year at Lawrence which would bump up to $18,000 because he’s a NMF. He’s not excited about going to the Midwest but it does seem like a very nurturing place. From what I’m reading on these boards, Barrett might have a brighter more diverse student body than Lawrence. He’s also waiting to hear from Grinnell and Whitman. His grades are not great so I’m not holding my breath for merit aid from them. </p>
<p>Full ride at ASU sounds very attractive. You are not alone in thinking about that $ being used towards grad school or a house. It’s a lot of $$$. Has he visited ASU? Maybe he will visit and love it. And maybe he will have an “idealic” college experience there; you never know. Congrats to him, and best of luck with the decision!</p>
<p>So you are looking at a little under $40K/year for Lawrence. So more like $160,000 total vs.$220,000. That is a pretty big difference.</p>
<p>There’s a world of difference between the small colleges your son likes and Barrett because Barrett is part of ASU. I’m wondering about fit - Barrett is awesome but the general vibe is very, very different from what he’d find at a LAC. Can he spend an Admitted Students overnight there?
Another issue is: when he applied to Wes and the other colleges, did you tell him he could go if he could get in, or did he not consult you?
Addtionally, can you afford Wes (even if it’s a lot of money) through some belt tightening but without touching your retirement and without taking on loans (I assume your son would take the federal loans, $5,500)?
Finally if he plans on going for a Philosophy PHD, his program would be funded so grad school wouldn’t really cost anything - but if he plans on going to Law School, the situation would be very different.</p>
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<p>However, starting at a big school and later transferring to a small school usually gets more of the disadvantages of each type while getting less of the advantages of each type, since the small school’s advantages are found more at the frosh/soph level (smaller classes, more personal attention), while the larger school’s advantages are found more at the junior/senior level (greater selection and more frequent offering of advanced courses).</p>
<p>OP, you can also read the thread “does a full ride trump everything else?”
Do full rides/full scholarships trump all else? - Parents Forum - College Confidential Forums</p>
<p>We budgeted for college and could afford Wes without dipping into retirement. But even so, that is an insane amount of $$$$. What if he takes an extra semester or two? That’s an extra $30- $60. I’m having a hard time justifying it. I concerned that he’d be surrounded by families for which it’s not such a big deal. I don’t think we’re doing him any favors by putting him in that environment and then pulling the rug out at graduation.</p>
<p>ucbalumnus @ 9:33 That is an excellent point. I was thinking that he would transfer for sophomore year. In reality, I admit, I think it is more likely that he would make friends and find his feet at ASU and not want to transfer. 
If he were that rare bird that simply cannot cope, he would have the option.</p>
<p>I am of the mind that Wes may be worth stretching for, but Lawrence is probably not. I think that Barrett will probably have more dynamic students.</p>
<p>I think if you are waking up in a cold sweat it is too much money for your family.</p>
<p>I would follow the money. Usually the honors programs create an intimate environment in a huge school. Tell him- at first it will be overwhelming but they grow into the big school. I know small LAC graduates who wish they went to a big U. totally regret the small experience. Bribe him. And promise him airfare, if needed, to come home, he can in a heartbeat. Get him a used beat up car. Plan on being eyeball-to-eyeball with him every six weeks. For year one, it may mean you going there. It may mean you taking time off from work to do so- but you are saving so much money $200K is more like $350K (pre-taxes).
BTW that was an angel who woke up up with the night sweats worrying about the $$. 
Where do you live?AZ? or northeast?</p>
<p>Great advice and yes, i think it may have been an angel. since this little crisis of confidence, i’ve had a series of frank conversations with S about the ramifications of different financial options. He’s handling it surprisingly well. We’re from the Northwest.</p>
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<p>It’s still a colossal amount of money…</p>
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<p>Or not, for some people.</p>
<p>I think you’d be crazy to turn down a free ride, especially at a reputable honors program like Barrett. </p>
<p>Okay, I am going to say that you let him apply… and didn’t tell him you had a financial cap until now. I think that is a bait and switch. Parents do this all the time in the spring, and I feel bad for their kids when it happens. If you had a financial downturn in the past few months, then I could understand it. But I think you are just counting the money now and figuring it out. That seems monumentally unfair to your son to me. </p>
<p>Also, when you start talking about transferring like it is not much of a big deal, I think you are letting money get in the way of trying to allow your son a full four years to take advantage of all a college has to offer. In my mind transferring is for the kid who made a very poor choice to start with and really can’t finish where they are, or someone who truly can’t afford the first two years at a four year school and needs to do two years at a CC for that reason. Parents who start rationalizing that if their kid is unhappy they can just transfer are trying to cover for the fact that they didn’t help their kid do an appropriate college search to start with.</p>
<p>If I were your kid, I would honestly think you are now being a jerk. Why let him apply to places you couldn’t afford? And it isn’t YOU spending the four years there, it is him – so it is easy to say “go to the big state school that is cheaper, even though you may be better suited for a small college environment”. And “transfer if it doesn’t work out”. IMHO, you should have thought of the money issue before you put in the applications. Now you have stuck your son with only one choice you consider affordable.</p>
<p>Also… do you have a spouse in the picture? What does your spouse say? I think it is sort of suspicious that you only put out two options – $220K and free – in your first post, when in fact there is an “in between” option of $160K. Sounds to me like you might be trying to build an argument for a kid AND a spouse while only giving this group partial facts. </p>
<p>And for what it is worth, my kid (NMF) was accepted to Lawrence with slightly better merit aid last year. She made a different (and more expensive) choice, but Lawrence was on the table, so I understand something about the options you are looking at. I just think you are trying to rationalize coming late to the table (when you can actually afford it, too) and pulling options out from under your son when he did all the work on the applications.</p>
<p>This has been an incredibly helpful conversation and I thank you all. I’ve got to say though that this last comment from inparent is laughably smug, judgemental, and mean-spirited. Two possibilities pop into my mind. One: You’ve compromised your and your kid’s financial health and you need to justify your decisions. And you are a financial aid officer for an expensive college. Do you honestly think an 18 year old kid can grasp the ramifications of being burdened with debt? </p>
<p>FYI, the money is set aside for S to make the final call about how it is used (e.g., spend all now; save for grad school, have a nest egg when he graduates.) No option has been removed. S is being give additional options and learning the long term financial ramifications of each. </p>
<p>Yes, I am guilty of trying to insulate my kid from modern financial realities and I’ve become increasingly uneasy about it. This is my first substantive post on here and I did try to simplify the problem to launch the conversation. </p>