<p>MN, two of my three kids have problems with executive functioning. It’s can be a huge problem. The kid may very well not be ready for a four year program, whether or not he wants this. The mom knows her kid. It sounds like a four year program might not even be necessary in his case, and might even be detrimental. To my mind, in my opinion, no offense, but you are pushing in the wrong (although well-intentioned) direction.</p>
<p>Cobrat, I wish you would stop putting down the SUNYs based on your friends experiences, that you keep repeating, in the 1990s. I’m sure you don’t know everything about all of the SUNY programs. Some of us cannot afford any better, and could do a lot worse. Sure it would be great if I had $60k for 4 years times 3 kids to pay for a lovely lac, but I can’t. Maybe you don’t understand that. It doesn’t sound like you are a parent. Sometimes good enough has to be enough.</p>
<p>Which is what the OP of this thread needs to realize as well…</p>
<p>A child that struggles with Executive Function is going to struggle with it at a community college or a 4 year college, but which school does HE want to attend because THAT will make ALL the difference in the world with the outcome and his general feeling of self-worth. If this boy hadn’t expressed dismay over his parents assessment over his lack of ability and potential to get into a 4 year college, this thread would have never been started. The core issue here is not his executive function skills, it is his parents perception of what is 'acceptable" for a college choice for their son vs what HE wants to do.</p>
<p>I’ve seen a lot of freshman boys who are not into school major in drinking once they are away from their parents home. Which might be okay if the parents were not under financial strain. I’m not saying that’s what this boy will do, but he’s a jock, good looking, and charming. It wouldn’t be difficult.</p>
<p>People here have already decided that this (16 year-old?) will probably not be successful in college, since he has been diagnosed with some executive functioning issues, does not measure up in his highly competitive HS, and (my new favorite!):
<p>I didn’t say he wouldn’t succeed because of this! You totally misinterpreted me, and I resent the misuse of my sentiments. I said some boys under these circumstances, not necessarily this kid, would major in drinking their freshman year at a four year college where they could be struggling. Please.</p>
<p>There are many paths in life other than four-year colleges, nothing wrong with that. If the OP, who knows her son, thinks he might be better in county first, stop giving her a problem. She knows him, we don’t.</p>
<p>“The original question was, how have people seen kids react to touring and applying, where community college must financially be the first stop? Does it inspire, or demoralize? I’m guessing it can go either way, and the person whose input is most valuable is my own kid’s”</p>
<p>I think it would be hard to have kids tour a college that they can’t attend. However, if you haven’t visited schools with good ld support, you may want to pay them a visit, even if your timetable is junior/senior year of college. </p>
<p>Fieldsports wrote, “why take cc classes now? High school level classes sound challenging enough. I don’t always see the need to rush things along, esp with a late bloomer. He’s just a sophomore.” </p>
<p>I don’t think it’s something you have to do now but I would recommend looking into it for senior year. If executive function is a big part of his problem and he’s not handing in work, motivation will play a large part in his success. He may really be proud of being able to go to county as a senior high school student (and take college courses) and that may inspire him to do better. </p>
<p>The other part of this-- and, unfortunately, I don’t really know enough to help here-- is whether or not he’s a good enough athlete to be recruited. If so, I don’t know how money and transfers work out. You may want to look over on the athletic board at cc and see if people have more info on that. It may be that he is able to win athletic scholarships that would make a lot of schools more affordable. It may also be that starting at a cc would impact the process OR that he should try to find a cc with a good team in his sport-- I really don’t know.</p>
<p>Just for clarification on the taking community college classes as a junior/senior–around here that would NOT be a step up from their high school classes, I guess that is not the case in NJ. The suggestion was made for him to explore classes NOT available at his high school…</p>
<p>Seriously though, that is a stereotype. Lots of unattractive, unathletic kids party, too. :)</p>
<p>Since college for our family is going to be a financial strain, you better believe we are planning on sitting our son down and letting him know our academic expectations beforehand… </p>
<p>Might he party? Might he fail? It’s certainly a possibilty. But do I plan to give him the benefit of the doubt and give him the opportunity to have the college experience he desires. You better believe it.</p>
<p>mncollegemom, you wrote: “Just for clarification on the taking community college classes as a junior/senior–around here that would NOT be a step up from their high school classes, I guess that is not the case in NJ. The suggestion was made for him to explore classes NOT available at his high school…”</p>
<p>Please speak for yourself. You suggested he take classes not at his high school. Before you posted, I had already posted the suggestion he take cc classes and that was NOT my intent: </p>
<p>“If it makes sense, I would tell him that if he has a certain gpa or test scores by junior year, you will enroll him in certain community college courses his senior year of high school. Several possible advantages: it will shorten the ‘dreaded’ time at the cc, he may really like it, he will get his feet wet with just 1-2 cc courses at a time and it may motivate him to do well now.”</p>
<p>I asked the OP a question and there’s really no need for you to redirect my question or change what my suggestion was.</p>
<p>Colleges accept AP credits because they are considered college-level classes. You said the cc classes there are not taught at college level. That sounds odd.</p>
<p>familyof3boys-we have been very upfront about costs for college with our kids and they are looking at schools that if they had to pay full tuition without any aid at all we could NEVER afford (not many could) but that hasn’t stopped them from looking. We consider those reach schools. Academically they have the stats to get in pretty much everywhere, realistically though, we know better. Our reach, sure thing, safety has more to do with price vs academic rigor. The kids understand that schools they want to attend have 25% acceptance rates and they are fine with that and have a couple back ups just in case. Sure they would LOVE to go there, but understand and accept that they might not. Nothing wrong with that at all.</p>
<p>How many kids without executive functioning issues start at ccs for financial reasons, even if they would prefer to be at four-years? Thousands. This isn’t any different.</p>
<p>No I said they were not a step UP, big difference…</p>
<p>The vo-tech type classes I suggested (plumbing being my specific example) are not “college” level, they are vocational level and those credits are NOT accepted at 4 year universities. Also, not all “academic” classes taught at the CC’s here are accepted at 4 year universities, or anywhere for that matter. Also, many LAC don’t accept ANY CC credits no matter what they are-but it’s hard to get any college classes to transfer to these same LAC. Certain classes taken at community colleges are transferable and you are doing a huge disservice to anyone that doesn’t understand that by suggesting otherwise.</p>
<p>First, I do have an idea of how much a private 4-year LAC costs…considering that I was the one paying for whatever my near-full ride scholarship/FA didn’t cover without any parental assistance because they weren’t in any position to help at the time. It was also a reason why I chose that LAC over the SUNY/CUNY choices I had…the difference was actually lower than what I’d have paid to attend the state/city options. </p>
<p>What’s more interesting was that this still seems to be the case more recently as attested to by a friend’s mother who mentioned how she was surprised at how the cost of sending her younger D to a well-respected private university(graduated '08) in the NE was much more inexpensive than sending her to their state system. And the gap in academic quality/atmosphere between their state system and the respectable respectable/elite universities was much wider than what existed in NY state/city at the time I graduated high school. </p>
<p>As for my comments about SUNY…I’m trying to relay the perspective that just as there are parents who push their kids too hard…there are parents/older relatives who severely underestimate the academic capabilities of their kids and thus, cut their kids off from what may be viable options. </p>
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<p>Politics plays a big part of it…especially with increasing emphasis on graduation rates and increased education access. Unfortunately…they’re going about it in the wrong way by lowering the minimal educational bar to the point some employers I’ve worked with have gotten leery of hiring graduates from many lower-tiered universities where they even suspect credit is being given for remedial coursework. </p>
<p>The state system I mentioned above which my friend’s mother found to be far less of a financial bargain compared with the respectable private university she ended sending her D to…one of her son’s friends was allowed full college and math credits for completing a remedial course covering the equivalent of 9th grade math. Something which I didn’t think was possible…but my friend said was actually pretty common among many kids who go to his state’s system.</p>
<p>Mn : “Certain classes taken at community colleges are transferable and you are doing a huge disservice to anyone that doesn’t understand that by suggesting otherwise.”</p>
<p>Mn, I simply wanted clarification. I didnt understand. I don’t know why you think you have a bone to pick with me. I wasn’t “suggesting” anything or doing anyone any “huge disservice”.</p>
<p>But Cobrat for many of us SUNY will be $20k per year, and an LAC will be $60k. Yes, I know for many it will be cheaper if they are judged to have financial need but some of us don’t qualify for financial aid, and still can’t afford it ($60k times 4 times 3 kids) for many reasons. Yes, of course we want our kids at the best schools, and aren’t underestimating them. But the money is not always there. You don’t know everything about every SUNY. Maybe some programs are terrible. But stop spreading the word whenever you can that SUNYs have to be a last chance proposition. I don’t think that’s true, and you are maligning many people’s degrees.</p>
<p>Redpoint–I agree, if your child is not an above average student or better, yes, you will end up paying full price at a LAC…that, however, is an unknown commodity on this board :).</p>