As I get each day closer to move in day at a college that i have 0 interest in going to and was my 7th choice. My parents are happy im going to this school but im miserable. I hated it when i visited 15 months ago and I hated orientation and im still not over getting reject from the schools i wanted to attend. I dont see a way out. Im not ready to leave home being in this mental state because it will only make it worse. I wish there is someway i could still stay home and withdraw from this school but i think its too late. I just feel awful
Why would you ever apply to a school you wouldn’t be happy attending? That was your first mistake, don’t do that.
my parents love the school thats why
care to share what school?
That was so unhelpful. You know that some parents insist that their children apply to certain colleges.
According to your posting history you may be going to Binghamton. It is a very good school. You were rejected by 6 schools and you need to get over that. Either attend Bing or take a gap year, work, and apply elsewhere.
You may want to talk to a counselor.
As a parent, I am sorry that you are feeling such distress about heading off to a college that you don’t really want to attend. If you are truly feeling this much trepidation about the school, you really should address this with your parents an or a therapist. It is never “too late” to change your mind, ever. There may be some consequences to changing your mind and you have to weigh the pros and cons. Life transitions are trying times and made more difficult when you are feeling so bleek about what was ultimately your decision. Really now is the time to share your problem with your parents.
With that said…
In case no one has told you, you are an adult now, and guess what…you rarely get what you want in life. I know it is hard to hear but you either have to ask for help or you really need to “let it go” (yes I know you are not Elsa) You can either choose to hang on to regret, thereby placing a HUGE roadblock to your future success or you can give it a chance (an honest fair chance) and no you are not going to LOVE this school in 1 week or 3 weeks or 10 weeks, it may take months and months, in fact you may never love, but you just might be able to make it work. If you are miserable and unyielding it is not going to make the situation one bit better.
So it seems to me that you need to embrace adulthood and do the grown up thing:
- Talk to your parents and professionals about your feeling and legitimate concerns. or
- Accept reality and make the most of it.
Good Luck! I promise you that your parents would rather you tell them the truth now and sure they may be grumpy about it, but they love you and want to see you succeed. I see that you have posted several times about not being sure of your self/ having a nervous breakdown because of grades etc…I really really really encourage you to talk to your parents or a friend’s parents or a teacher or a coach, in real life.
Give Bing a try and see how it goes. It could be worse, you could have had no choices, or you could be forced to attend a school that seriously conflicts with your beliefs (like a school that did not match your personal religious beliefs). Go give it your best shot.
Is it possible to switch colleges at this point i dont want to move out of my house while im in this mental condition. I think it would be best for me to stay home for my freshman year to work my way out of this depression and figure where i will spend the last three years of college at a later time. i say this bc i feel if i go to bing miserable nothing will change.
Do you mean attend community college?
Well then you have answered your own question. Talk to your parents and stay home. Remember that the doors that are open to you now may not be the same door that are open to you later and the doors that are open later may not be as good.I think I said something about consequences earlier. AND Of course your parents may have a given set of rules that you are gonna have to adhere to (well at least I hope they have a set of rules that you will need to adhere to).
Mine would be:
- Attend a local university or community college and maintain a certain GPA. or 2. Get (an maintain) a full time job.
- See a therapist/counselor.
Remember anything is possible and nothing is forever. Don’t let friends and girlfriends limit your growth.
Not to clutter your mind more, but a change of environment and meeting new friends potentially have positive impact.
Honestly I talk with my parents and if you feel you can’t have a true conversation without arguing, old teacher, friend, neighbor. Your not looking for agreement, but someone looking out for your best interest. Which what they may say is not always what you want to hear, but they’re not in the middle of the forest and can see beyond what we can sometimes
IN both your posts, you mention your mental status; this is a lot more important than attending college at this point. I would recommend immediately speaking with your family physician-it would be confidential as you are an adult-so that you can get an immediate referral to counseling. College can wait; getting yourself healthy is much more important, and you take action immediately.
I feel better now, and am going to go to college in 20 days with a positive mindset and make the most of out the situation thanks