<p>Seeing the sun shimmer slowly over the horizon after staying up late to complete the homework for all 8 of my AP classes, I decided to brew a nice, fresh pot of coffee. I quickly jumped into some loose jeans and a hoodie and ran out the door, of course, forgetting my coffee...</p>
<p>(Make it long or short, mock the typical CC user!)</p>
<p>Seeing how I was close to completing a vaccine for AIDS before my first of 15 AP exams, I decided to quickly post a chances thread for every Ivy, all other top 15 schools (according to U.S. News), and my local community college. I wanted to emphasize my world-breaking GPA, federal research grants, Nobel Prize, and my perfect SAT. After I deemed my post good enough, I left to take my AP exam. </p>
<p>When I returned home some time later, people were giving me a bleak outlook. I then realized that I forgot to post my incredible GPA, leading to everybody giving me such low chances for every school, including my local community college. Such is life for the typical CC overachiever, and I must go now, I have decided to retool our health care system. Will return from the White House in 3 hours, and then PM to solve other world problems. Bye, I must save our wonderful country…</p>
<p>(hope that you enjoyed it 
)</p>
<p>Well, after plugging my iPod into my solar panels under a large lamp for my ISEF worthy science fair project, I finished the code for the camera for our robot within 20 mins, and after 4-5 hours of distractions/dinner/checking CC, I headed home to do my 3-4 hours of AP homework, self study, projects, and procrastination, I fell asleep at 2 in the morning and woke up in the morning and grabbed tea, because obviously everyone drinks tea instead of coffee ;)</p>
<p>After drinking the lovely tea I stuffed all my homework into my bag and hurried off to school. During the first ten minutes of a mislead class, I quickly jotted down in a precisse manner the way the teacher should have instructed the class. I made sure everyone knew I was talking to the teacher about her teaching habits by talking loudly and making loud, crude comments on her ignorance, and explaining my belief on the theory of relativity. I then handed her my new and improved lesson plan, then laughed at her infront of everyone. After class I hid in a corner of the library and did the homework I had just recieved, then heard the lunch bell ring, (another lunch in the library!).</p>
<p>(and yes dreamer, I loved it lol. Very nice and showey)</p>
<p>^Thanks lost<em>in</em>thought, I figured that it would be the “perfect mold” of the incredibly overachieving CC users! ;)</p>
<p>hahaha… =D</p>
<p>I took 20 AP exams this year, got 10s on all of them, got David Stern to change NBA minimum age limit to accomadate me, won the lottery, finished Einstein’s last work (connecting 4 forces in 1 equation), was hired by MIT to teach graduate physics classes, and will be CEO of Coca-Cola starting next year. Beat that you pathetic unintelligent CC users!</p>
<p>(HAHA, it’s so funny to become an egomaniac and post arragont stuff like this )</p>
<p>After I finished building my hydrogen-cell car and developing a cure for prostate cancer, I decided to check my ACT and AP scores. I got a 37 composite and 6s on all 14 of my APs, and I wasn’t quite satisfied, so I posted a thread asking about my chances to gain dual enrollment in Oxford and Cambridge, and I was mocked mercilessly. If only I had friends to tell about this.</p>
<p>(LMAO @ THIS THREAD!!!)</p>
<p>After being mocked, I decided to write a letter to the president explaining my AMAZINGNESS, he gave me a scholarship worth 4 million to any school in America… so much for oxford and cambridge. I accepted his offer and completed 8 years of college over the summer and am got my ph d. in one week. After Bill gates heard about me, he hired me to invent a mock product to compete with microsoft, so he still got the profit. I took an IQ test three times over the period my college career and got so high, it wasn’t even measurable. Just like in HS tests, I WAS THE CURVE!</p>
<p>After inventing a new cure for AIDS with my research associates on Monday- i then rushed home to do all my homework for the eight APs I was taking and the five APs I was self studying. I finished all my work in five minutes. Bored, I developed a new political strategy for Hillary Clinton and re-drafted my essay of acceptance for the NObel Prize. I then went to the internet to check my SAT score. I recieved A 2399. I was horrified. to punish myself I hid in my room for five days.
Then I after reviewing the test- i realized that the choice A on the grammar section was correct. I then constructed an elaborate proof proving so to collegeboard.
I recieved my point back, of course.</p>
<p>I solved the Colatz problem, the Riemann hypothesis, and the Goldbach conjecture.
I won 1 Fields medal for each year of high school.</p>
<p>After curing all known cancers, and several that I discovered, I went on to develop an effective treatment for all heart/lung diseases.</p>
<p>In several flights of fancy, I won IBO, IMO, IChO, and IPho. I negotiated with RSI/TASP to let me only stay at their programs for several days as I flew back and forth from RSI/TASP/IMO. </p>
<p>In my spare time, I placed first in ISEF 4 times, and won Intel STS and Siemens.</p>
<p>In the summer of my junior year, I went to the middle east and negotiated all oil resources into the hands of American oil companies. I was paid 400 million dollars, which I then used to start my own foundation for starving children globally.</p>
<p>Unfortunatly, to my downfall, I was caught, and everyone knew i had gone temporarilly insane by the pressures that my parents had bestowed, and thrust upon me. Since the president still liked me, he pardoned me, and I was free. I never did anything wrong ever again, except for maybe only tipping 12% instead of 15%. Oh well… I still cured aids! I also managed to create a pill for pregnant ladies to take to prevent their children from being stupid, after all, the world does not need another homer simpson, (ps, I killed him during my momentarilly insane actions, I was also pardoned!).</p>
<p>This is so awesome!!! Best thread tonight!</p>
<p>When I arrived home from school yesterday, my mother got me my customary milk and cookies. As I began chomping on my mothre’s fresh cookies, I decided to establsih a rival to Microsoft so Jerry Seinfeld would be in my commercials. I then wrote the software for an operating system so elaborate, you could write legit papers in your sleep! I was slightly thrilled because I was more proud of my time machine and 5-Grammy winning album that sold 20 million records. </p>
<p>The next day when I arrived home, I was snacking on Juicy Juice juiceboxes and Lunchables Pizza, and Bill Gates was in my home. He offered me $10 billion to sell him my new company, but I knew that it was worth $120 billion dollars overnight. I told him to hit the road, and I threw my 1 month old PC at him on his way out because I no longer needed. Three days later, Microsoft filed for Chapter 11, and was declared richest man in the world. Harvard, Princeton, Yale, MIT, and Stanford begged me to attend, but I told them that I wanted to graduate form 2nd grade first. </p>
<p>Instead, I formed a new university at age 7 that now surpasses any institution in the world, and it’s called SmartAS Suniversity. I will now take your apps, if you even can get in 1% acceptanc rate this coming year, and if you would like my 5 Nobel rizes, keep them. I started a new award system that starts next year. Farewell from the world’s smartes 7 year old.</p>
<p>PART 2 coming later…lol</p>
<p>(^Omg, I love that kid, tis funny. Haha… this thread is fun)</p>
<p>Today, I browsed CC. MLIA.</p>
<p>^^Your welcome, hope that you enjoyed it!! Will have part 2 coming tomorrow lol ;)</p>
<p>Then I awoke. It had all been a dream - fleeting fancies, a pedestal upon which I had put myself. I sat up, put on my fuzzy baby-blue slippers that I keep by my bed, and made my way to the kitchen. The sun was just setting, and my dysfunctional family was getting ready to go to bed. I put two strawberry pop tarts in the toaster-oven, grabbed a glass of chocolate milk, and headed to the computer, where I immediately opened 6 bookmarked tabs. I logged into College Confidential and started browsing the HSL topics. It was then that I clicked on a funny little story thread started by a relatively new poster who was fond of existentialistic debates.</p>
<p>While typing out what I thought to be a novel and quirky response, I realized someth – OH MY GOODNESS I’m writing what’s going on right now! I’ve become the author and editor of my own life! My present is being controlled by whatever the hell I put here, and…</p>
<p>Two fighters incoming on the 6 o’clock! DIVE YOU B**<strong><em>D, DIVE!! Tracers on the port side, flak 50 below - SHOOT BACK YOU FOOL! Oh my God, we’re all gonna die! No wait, we’re all clear! That was some d</em></strong> good afternoon, m’ Queen, do you fancy a cup o’ tea and some crumpets and crackers to go along with it? No? Very well then, if you shall follow me into the courtyard. Dumbledore has just arrived, and he has brought the explosives, which will need to be packed tightly together if we want these corncakes to do what we want them to. I expect the very best out of you, Yossarian. You will fly out to the mountaintops of Meru, where you will find an empty mansion. Knock three times, and say in a falsetto tone, “the singing stones are pleased” to meet you, kind and gentle lady! Here at our store you will find everything you need, from ocean foam to the moon’s atmosphere! With a little help from our knowledgeable staff you’ll be able to swing low, sweet chariotttt. Coming for to carry me home is where the metaphorical heart that represents love and happiness resides…</p>
<p>The ants have spoken.
Hair upon diamond, my…*** AM I WRITING? HAVE I BECOME A NONSENSICAL CC POSTER???</p>
<p>OMG!!! STOP KILLING MY BEAUTIFUL THREAD!!! This thread made my week. I love everyones sarcasticness.</p>