<p>My parents met at college. We've attended football games there every fall, since forever. It's a really enjoyable atmosphere but I think they sort of look at it with rose-colored, nostalgic glasses. By that I mean I think a lot of obnoxious people go there and I'd prefer to attend somewhere with a higher concentration of really dedicated students. For example I know like a twenty girls going there this fall and they're no where near the top of the class. Anyways, I just can't wrap my head around them not wanting me to achieve more and broaden my horizons. I'm not going to say the school but it's definitely not Notre Dame or Northwestern or anything like that. I think it would be considered a large tier 3 college on CC. I worked really hard to get where I'm at and I feel like I'm throwing away all of that hard work if I have to go there. I literally would have gotten in with an ACT 8-10 points lower.</p>
<p>Well, I think they should let you pick within whatever financial constraints there are. But you also have a wrong attitude. Big state schools serve a large variety of people of the state and just because there are people in with lower scores doesn’t mean too much. But people with advanced coursework will be in advanced classes and the top students at large schools often have students that could have gone to ‘better’ colleges and just either like the college or it was affordable or both. Such schools often have deep resources of their own and profs who are delighted to find above average students.</p>
<p>Then get a scholarship to a different school that shows them that other school values you more. Have a discussion with them about what they looked for in a college. Really listen and then tell them what you value in a college. Don’t just disregard the school out of hand without having some serious thoughts. That won’t go over well.</p>
<p>Hmmm, there is no shame in attending a state school like the University of Michigan or Michigan State University as a high achieving student studying engineering.</p>
<p>All of your hard work in high school is not just to compete for admissions to colleges, but also to prepare you to succeed in college – any college, particularly as an engineering major.</p>
<p>Right, I don’t think parents should pressure because of nostalgia, and I understand your attitude, because something that is hard to achieve just feels like it should be worth more than something that’s easy to achieve, but you should realize that your hard work in HS was to prepare you for classes in college (many of which, at that university you look down upon, will be plenty challenging) and for life, not just to get in to college. Your AP credits would likely earn your family more money at a public than a private, in fact. Plus, a lot of publics can set you up just as well as a private in many fields or even better. For example, if I want to be an engineer, I’d choose UIUC/Wisconsin/UMich/Purdue engineering over ND engineering every time, even if the cost was the same, and the job outlook would likely be as good or better for me. Speaking of cost, if that big state school is in-state and your family makes too much to qualify for a lot of fin aid, it may very well be a lot cheaper than a private you’re aiming for. If your test scores truly are high, you can earn scholarship money with them. </p>
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<p>This is very true. It sounds like the school is a big state school, and those do serve a variety of students. The best students will likely be found in the more challenging majors.</p>
<p>You say that it is a Tier 3 school, so if you are top of your class, you probably can get merit scholarships at higher ranking schools. </p>
<p>Are you saying that it is ranked about 125ish on USNews? If so, is it largely a commuter/suitcase school? Do you live close to it?</p>
<p>When I first read your post, I was reminded of a student from my kids’ high school who had a dreadful experience. Her parents went to UAkron, fell in love, and got married. They have all kinds of romantic thoughts about UAkron. The parents were commuters when they went there. Fast forward to their oldest D. All throughout HS, they pushed for their D to go to their school. They had her convinced that she would LOVE it (like they did). I warned them that their D (who lived in the south) would not likely have the same experience as them since the school still is a commuter campus and their D would likely be alone too much. They would not listen and their D enrolled. Her Facebook posts were predictable. The first few days she was high with excitement. By the end of the 1st week, her posts were turning sour (lonely), and by the end of the 2nd week the writing was on the wall…the school was a huge mistake. By mid September her transfer apps were sent. She was extremely lucky that Miss State ( a school that she had originally applied and got merit from) agreed to let her still have her award as Spring transfer. Off she went and she never looked back at Akron (which is a fine school). She is now a teacher at the high school she attended. </p>
<p>@mom2collegekids:</p>
<p>Well, the OP did mention an enjoyable football experience and that it’s large. Still could be a commuter school, though not too many large commuter schools with enjoyable football experiences come to mind.</p>
<p>Also, the OP’s other posts tend to mention the University of Michigan.</p>
<p>I very much doubt it’s U of M when the OP talks about it being a Tier 3 school. U of M is near-worshiped on here in many forums. </p>
<p>Personally, as long as you’re within whatever financial parameters are set out by your parents, I believe that students should have close to free reign (within reason). It is their education and four years of their lives, not their parents. However, what we think doesn’t mean anything. It’s up to your parents. </p>
<p>By the way, because you do mention U of M, if the school is MSU, you should know that it is rated well into the 100 by US News- higher than many state flagships. It’s easy to forget that when it’s overshadowed by the hype around U of M. If it’s not MSU, carry on. </p>
<p>I know so many Penn State families where it’s just expected the kids will go to PSU. I mean, if God isn’t a Penn State fan, why is the sky blue and white? For a lot of these kids, PSU is a safety, BUT it’s also a lot cheaper than all the better ranked schools these great students can get into. Very often, what the parents tell the kids is that they need to find a school that is approximately the cost of Penn State. 9 times out of 10 the kids end up at PSU and those kids are very happy there. Some go into the honors college. Others do the accelerated pre-med/med track. And others just go and drink the beer flavored kool-aid in Happy Valley. </p>
<p>And of course, the kids do sometimes go elsewhere. I know one kid who went to Drexel and was extremely happy there and got a great job. Another who went to low key Ursinus, which better suited her less rah rah personality. And the parents were fine with these choices so long as the costs were comparable. I’m sure your parents want you to be happy too and would be open to a similar deal. Look around on the internet and see where you can get some money. And then talk to them about the possibilities. I’ll bet they come around.</p>
<p>The college is a top 100 land-grant public with a strong sports following. We live about 90 minutes away. It is not U. of Michigan, but U. of Michigan, Notre Dame and Northwestern are schools I plan to apply to. I don’t believe those schools really give merit awards. And I’m not a perfect 4.0 and 36 student, but I’m up there. I’m really not being a snob, the girls I know going there are 3.0-3.5 GPA and 19-25 ACT range.</p>
<p>Growing up my dad has always tongue in cheek said, “You can go to any college you would like. But the only one I’m paying for is [my alma mater].” Even says a similar version to his friends and extended family. They are obsessed with their alma mater. Tickets to everything, pretty big donor levels, etc. I don’t even really bring up other schools I’m applying to. It’s not a financial thing, it’s a we want our kids to go there too thing. It’s fun for football and hockey games but I don’t want to go there if I can avoid it.</p>
<p>Gull Lake is in Minnesota. Great fishing area. </p>
<p>Are we talking U MN?</p>
<p>So the comments aren’t taken over by speculation, the school is Michigan State University. I have tremendous respect for the college but it’s just not “me”. I have friends in the honors college who transferred out after freshman year. And like I said, my parents are obsessed with creating this generational legacy thing. I don’t understand it, at all. With 25% of the incoming freshman at ND being legacies, I wouldn’t mind creating a generational legacy thing there. Ha!</p>
<p>OK, so what do you want to study in college and what do you want to do after college?</p>
<p>Michigan State is NOT a third tier school! First tier among public U’s- much, much better than most flagships. Also can be better than some of the privates you mention. It lacks the name prestige of Michigan but certainly is in the upper echelons. btw- how do you know the ACT scores of everyone??? Definitely apply there as well as Michigan and others. Consider it your safety and the one school you apply to to appease your parents. Then stop spending your time thinking about it. Also- don’t screw up on your essays or they could figure that if you really don’t want to attend they should give your potential place to someone else. How embarrassing it could be to diss a school as not worthy and then not get accepted to it.</p>
<p>I absolutely did not want to attend U-Wisconsin-Madison because I was from the suburbs there but finances dictated and it was the best option for a NMS. Lived on campus and loved it. Was surprised when son wanted mom’s alma mater. He had a different experience not factoring in the era difference. </p>
<p>Your parents’ school is large enough you do not have to repeat their experiences. You do not need to care about sports. Apply and don’t obsess about it. When next spring comes and you have your options you can discuss things with them. Pick your school for you, not what you have heard from others, peers as well as parents.</p>
<p>There’s a Gull Lake in southern Michigan, too. Anyway, MSU, like romanig says is very much “under-rated” because of the big brother of UofM. Lots and lots of smart kids there and actually a 3.0 - 3.5 and 19-25 ACT is at the lower end of accepted kids, so good luck to your friends actually getting acceptances to MSU. 3.5uw and 25 ACT is about the minimum you want to get into MSU. If you’re going into engineering at MSU frankly the internationals sitting next to you in class will have the ability to kick your butt so don’t underestimate the competitiveness of MSU. </p>
<p>My advice, apply to UofM, MSU and the others you mentioned and see what happens but don’t be silly and dismiss MSU…it’s rated higher than some of the other Big 10 schools, it shows up in international rankings AND it’s getting harder and harder to get in. Finally it has a much nicer campus than UofM and you won’t be living in the hinterlands. My family bleeds blue for literally generations, but the MSU that I visited with one of my sons now feels far, far more like UofM of old in terms of the kids, the school spirit, the cohesive campus and the caliber of the students. If that’s the one your parents are willing to pay for and you can get in, count your blessings. </p>
<p>Will any of our opinion make any difference at all in your situation? Frnakly, I do not believe so. If you could pay for your UG independently, go anywhere you wish. If not, you have to consider your parents’ input to your decision making. You said that you have worked very hard. That means that you are up to significant Merit award at many places. So, go for it, get it, and then present this fact to your parents. This may make a difference. However, as I said, any of our opinions here most likely will have no influence on your situation whatsoever.<br>
If you want our support, I can provide it. But then, you will think that I am just bragging. Whatever you feel, here I go. My D. has graduated #1 in her very rigorous private HS class and got a decent score of 33 on the ACT. She was not inspired to go to any elite college. Instead, she choose to attend public in-state in Honors college, where we were surprized to see that most of the accepted to Honors were in fact valedictorians primarily from the private HS. She fit into this group very nicely…and she was attending on the full tuition Merit award.<br>
After all, you may find out, that your parents are not so disrespecting of your choices, but at the end they may know the best. We did not push our D. at all. It was her decision and a very mature one. She simply said: “I will do just fine anywhere”. And she did - graduated #1 pre-med in her UG class and got great choices of Med. Schools to attend, includign top 20s.
I do not see any reason why you would not be successfull at any place in the same way. You seem to be the same kind of hard working person as my D. As long as UG fits your personality and wide range of interests, the ranking is irrelevent. There is always certain number of the very top caliber students at any place. And do not expect to slack anywhere, it will not be a good idea at the lowest of the lowest ranked, it will backfire. I promise that to achieve at any UG, you will have to work hard, much harder than you ever did in HS. BTW the cuts for D’s Honors college were top 2% of HS class, ACT=31+, I would not call it “average” by no means, most of these kids could have successfully applied to Ivy / Elite.</p>
<p>OP, we know several kids at MSU, all of them fantastic students. One girl in particular is ridiculously talented. And, no, she is not a 4.0/36 either. She’s more like a 4.7/36. I wrote a letter of recommendation for her for an engineering scholarship. I had a hard time writing the letter because I couldn’t come up with the words to properly describe how talented and driven she is. She is finding MSU to be plenty challenging and they’re providing her with research opportunities as an undergrad that other schools wouldn’t have provided.</p>
<p>Any school is what you make of it. And, to be honest, to say you’re not being a snob and then say “the girls I know going there are 3.0-3.5”, well you may want re-think that.</p>
<p>That said, is it right for your parents to force you to go to their Alma Mater? No. But if your father refuses to pay for anywhere else, that’s his prerogative. Then you have a choice to make. But, it’s a two-way street and you need to not reject an otherwise very good school out of hand. I know that can be tough if you feel it’s been shoved down your throat, but if the choice comes down to getting a great education from a great U and having it paid for by your parents, vs. going somewhere else and coming out with lots of loans, you’d be crazy to pass up the money.</p>
<p>As others have said. Apply wherever you want, see what FA packages are, and then comes decision time. Don’t burn too many emotional BTU’s worrying about it right now.</p>
<p>MSU is NOT a 3rd tier school. And stop obsessing about what the stats are of girls that are going there. Large publics, even schools like UCLA, have some students with modest test scores. </p>
<p>I am not saying that you have to go to MSU, but if your parents wont pay for another school, you really have few choices. You would either have to get a free ride somewhere or go to MSU. </p>
<p>Ask your parents if they will pay for Notre Dame or your other schools. If they say, “no”, then guess what? you wont be going to ND. </p>
<p>Your parents are too affluent for you to get enough need based aid anywhere. </p>
<p>So, find some full rides or go to MSU. </p>
<p>(do you go to an all-girls high school?)</p>