<p>Just reading the sage responses leads me to conclude that "worth" and "value" of an education is definitely dependent on the person. </p>
<p>I will say this as a father of a D at MIT and who is also a graduate of Stanford, my degree has undoubtedly opened many doors for me. On a very basic math level, has the approximate "incremental" earnings from my degree exceeded my tuition that my parents paid? Its hard to prove but I am 99.99% positive that it has over the years. However, this doesn't mean its worth it - not to everyone. </p>
<p>This is a very personal decision for each person. My advice, take a gander at all the responses that've been posted and stew on it for a bit - at the end of the day, the decision is 100% up to you.</p>
<p>Yes, we would send our student to Notre Dame again. It has been the perfect fit for personality and has offered the academic challenge we had all hoped for. And, as student our is completing jr year, ND has opened many doors for opportunity as well that our student has taken advantage of. No regrets all the way around. As far as other education, our student attended a K-6 public school in our area. If we could do that over again, would have chosen private, as student did attend private HS. I am not knocking public school (elem, HS or college), but from our experience the private setting has offered much more opportunity. </p>
<p>I attended one of our state flagship schools for college; if I could do it over again, I would have applied to more private schools (even if the cost were prohibitive!) Spouse attended Penn undergrad and says w/o a doubt would have attended again.</p>
<p>PS-agree very much with CAcoolDad^ in that education is a very personal decision as well!</p>
<p>Well, our D is nearly at the half way point in her pricey private school education. We picked her up at the airport for spring break last week and on our long drive home, she told us story after story of the incredible students she has come to know, amazing professors who teach her classes, opportunities abound on campus she has experienced, etc. All of a sudden she became very emotional and tearful. She said she feared she had not told us often enough how grateful she is that we are allowing her to attend the university (paying the big $$$ instead of telling her she had to take the free rides offered by StateUs). She said that she tries every day to do her best in an attempt to be "worthy" of the sacrifices we are making for her to attend the school. Talk about an "Amen" parent moment! We have wrestled with the fact that older Ds entire education did not cost what one year of younger Ds is setting us back. If we werent entire sure before, that car ride cleared up any lingering doubts we might have had.</p>
<p>Son #1- not worth it for the small LAC which suited him perfectly. I wanted college to motivate and engage and stimulate him. I thought he was at a school where kids took chances, pushed themselves. He was, but he didn't. He would have been better off taking the money he was offered at the lesser school which required internships, for example, and didn't perhaps make the kids feel they were so darn special. He might not have been as happy, but he might have grown up. </p>
<p>Son #2- worth if for the Ivy that was not his first choice. Completely engaged kid. Any school would have been worth it.</p>
<p>If your retirement account is on target, you are confident of your future earning abilities and can pay for your child's educaion, why not. What better way to spend your hard earned savings.</p>
<p>Going into to large debt for any school.... better think long and hard, I think we are all learning the hard lessons of over leveraging.</p>
<p>I wrote ~30K check for the last 4 years of DD high school which is now almost $35K/year and it was worth.
Why? Whenever I went to this HS I always had the feeling that if I've to redo my HS I would like to do it here.
The same thing happened whenever we visited MIT, Harvard or Stanford. I always had this feeling that if I could go back and had a chance to do it I would have loved to attend a University like this.
So then if I can afford I better send my daughter to HS or College where it is once in life time experience. The memories will last for her whole life.
Such cherished memories are worth evey penny in my view. </p>
<p>But yes if you could afford it.</p>
<p>If you have to take out loans to do this or the child have to take loans to do it then it might not be that worth because the child may not come out of loan burden and may repent going to the University.</p>
<p>Sometimes it's worth it, sometimes not. I was not thrilled with my freshman son's choice initially. A lot of money for an expensive school that was not well known. But, it was a great match for him. He was getting burned out about academics and really had no idea what he wanted to do. He is getting a great education, a lot of attention and his intellectual curiousity has been aroused. It could not be better. Had he selected some of his choices, I doubt this would have been the case.</p>
<p>On the other hand, I have one at a large state school, and have to say that I would have been throwing money away sending him to an expensive private school. He would have likely been out on his rear end by now. THat he can blend in a bit and not get overly scrutinized has been a saving situation for him. He needed a lot of latitude.</p>
<p>It is a rare parent who will actually admit it, if he believes the school choice for his child was a mistake. This decision of where to send one's child evokes very strong feelings in a great many people, probably because it is somehow tied up with self worth, fond memories of one's own college years or the opposite, and of course the perceived assessment of one's child's abilities that college choice can imply.</p>
<p>Admitting that the college choice wasn't a good one necessitates 1) asking why such a mistake was made, 2) considering whether the student's actions contributed to the fit problem, and 3) determining what must now be done about it--all uncomfortable questions unless a transfer has already taken place and esp. if the student has dropped out. Secondly, no one can know for certain how a student might have fared at a different school, so it's impossible to assert with 100% confidence that the choice was a mistake. A different school might have posed different challenges, which could also have led to a less than ideal experience. Some people, after all, create their own problems, find something wrong with everything, and are always unhappy. Others, seem to make lemonade out of their lemons. Consequently, most parents will simply say "DD or DS is very happy at College X." I've seldom heard a parent say "S/D is miserable. We made a poor choice." This does not mean they didn't make a poor choice, though, lol!</p>
<p>GFG, I'll be happy to bite. We made a poor choice with S1. Or rather, he did. Did not work out well at all. And though I can see that S2's choice has worked out in ways that going to what I would have preferred, I am rather begrudging in coming to the conclusion that his choice was the best one. S3 is just radiantly happy and done a complete turn around in attitude, work ethic, motivation, etc. Though MAYBE it would have occurred elsewhere as well, it is the particulars that make his school quite unique that have him enthralled. It would not have been my first choice for him, either. None of my kids went to the schools that I felt should have been their best choices.</p>
<p>If you don't mind sharing, cpt., was the problem that "je ne sais quoi" sense of fit, the academic rigor, social compatibility with the other students, financial requirements, .... what?</p>
<p>My recent law school grad is now in mid-20s and has many friends who think they chose the wrong college. Some went to very prestigious schools. Some did not. </p>
<p>Now, perhaps it's harder for parents to admit a mistake-I don't know. But lots of 20 somethings will admit that they did. Of course, sometimes you have to take these tales with a cup of salt. The kid who goofed off in college will blame the college--when (s)he probably would have done the same at any college. Nevertheless, I think that 2-5 years out, people really do have a better sense of whether the choice they made was a good one.</p>
<p>Yes, I would and I am. But with two caveats. One is that the school has to be markedly "better" (sorry, I just can't think of another word but that's not really the one I want) than our state U in terms of the quality and size of classes, personal attention, doors that it opens, additional opportunities and so forth. The second is that I would only do it for a kid who is going to make the most of the opportunity and who has proven him/herself in high school to go the extra mile, etc. Son #1 went to a top state university and it was just not the experience our next two kids had/are having in private schools. But, I do think that very successful kids are going to do pretty well anywhere if they are not intimidated by a large and impersonal campus. In hindsight, no regrets about going private for college but maybe some regrets over not having gone private in high school. We are a real public school family and sought out excellent programs but I'm pretty convinced at this point that the top private schools would have been a qualitatively different experience academically even though my kids excelled in public school.</p>
<p>My guess would be that if the S or D went to an elite school and it didn't turn out well, that would be difficult to admit. The competition for spots at those schools is so intense now, and rankings are so much more important in the public consciousness than they used to be. So how do you say, "S/D didn't like it at HYPS et al?" knowing that these are considered to be among the best schools in the country and tens of thousands of kids were dying to go there but couldn't? Mightn't people react rather negatively to that? Like, "What the heck was wrong with your S/D?"</p>
<p>It's very hard to put a dollar value on these things. Maybe it depends on what you can afford--"costly your college as your purse can bear." We felt our 2 kids ferociously expensive educations, for which we got no financial aid though we're
far from rich, were worth every penny, and we're happier driving old cars anyway. You can't take it with you.</p>