Is my father unreasonable?

<p>So here is the thing. I will be attending an all womens college in Pennsylvania, hopefully, for the next four years. The cost is around $45,000/year. My originial financial aid package came to be $28,400. I have a single parent household and my dad is the custodial parent. My mom is out of the picture and long story short she is in jail. He claims she doesn't give her child support and she says she does, even my two older sister say she does because they still carry out her finances while she is in jail. Anyways. My father just sent my other sister to school this past year and is now (hopefully) sending me off to college. My dad applied for the Parent PLUS loan for me since he received it for my sister but he got rejected for it for me. This gave me an additional $6,000 but he is still ungrateful and is saying it isn't enough. His credit is really bad and I couldn't even take out a private loan because of it and because I virtually have no credit. Now I owe $12,600 for the year and he is saying he doesnt think he can send me to school this year. First, I got on my college's soccer team. Second, I would like to become a physician at some point in my life. But I do not understand why making a $1,200 payment a month is "ridiculous", especially if your a financing your children's education or at least supporting their education. AND he went to FORDHAM UNIVERSITY! so he should at least know the prize of an education especially if your daughter would like to become a pediatric orthopedic surgeon. He is retired and makes $48,000/ year and is 63. I have two jobs ( one of which barely schedules me) but the other I get 200-400 paychecks and I already started paying off the money and he wont even make his payments yet. So my sister will be a college sophomore and I will be a college freshman. But I have a question: IS THIS REALLY THE BEST I CAN RECEIVE IN FINANCIAL AID? ESPECIALLY IF I DID NOT HAVE A SPECTACULAR GPA.</p>

<p>So here is the thing. You are 18. Your father does not have to give you a cent for college. Especially a pricey private. </p>

<p>Your father has bad credit and makes little. And you are complaining because he won’t pay $1,200 per month. He probably can’t afford that. </p>

<p>I’m sorry but your post comes off as having been made by an entitled brat. Especially if you did not have a great GPA for scholarships. That is ALL on you. </p>

<p>If you want to go to this school so badly take a gap year and work and save. Or do what post people do and go to CC for the first two years and then transfer to an affordable school. </p>

<p>Wow</p>

<p>I would urge you to reconsider and talk with a respected adult about your plans. If you want to attend a U that costs $45K per year and your package awarded $28K, that is a big gap. If any of your package includes loans, that’s an even bigger gap. You have to figure our how you will get all four years of undergrad PLUS med school. Racking up lots of debt neither you nor dad can afford is a terrible idea. </p>

<p>As a family, your dad needs to figure out whether either you or your sister can attend college, and how it will be paid for. Most folks with few assets try to get significant merit + FAid, and if that fails, they attend affordable in-state publics, including CC and transfer. If you don’t have great grades and scores, it is tough to qualify for merit awards. Living at home while attending CC and college can further reduce costs and help minimize debt, especially if both you and sis do this. $48K to live on, support a family of at least 3 and help 2 kids with college does really not go far. </p>

<p>You are being unrealistic and unreasonable in trying to attend a school that neither you nor your family can afford, especially for 4+ years.</p>

<p>You can go to a state school and then go to med school. Most people who are in med school went to public colleges.</p>

<p>The cost is around $45,000/year. My originial financial aid package came to be $28,400.</p>

<p>This sounds like a school that doesn’t meet need since the family contribution is a large chunk of your dad’s salary.</p>

<p>It sounds like your dad got himself into trouble borrowing for your sister and got behind with his bills.</p>

<p>Are you serious? You think that a man whose credit is bad can afford to pay 1200 a month towards your college costs, which he’d have to do for four years? </p>

<p>Take a gap year or see if you can attend your local state school.</p>

<p>The college is Cedar Crest in PA. You can’t afford this school. </p>

<p>How will your sister’s college costs get paid? You both may have to seek other options. </p>

<p>If your grades aren’t that great, you may not do well enough in college and the premed prereqs to even go to med school. You don’t want to rack up a bunch of debt and end up with a much lower paying job.</p>

<p>I understand how frustrating it can be, but you just can’t afford it, bud. Right now is the time to consider delaying your admittance or seriously looking at another, more affordable option. Do you have a university that’s within driving distance? I both stayed away and commuted to my university last year, and my grades were actually better when I commuted. It’s not such a bad thing, and it helps you try and get all your homework done at school. </p>

<p>I live with my single mother who’s still buried in some debt from my father’s battle with cancer, so I know how bad your dad probably feels. My mom wants to give me everything, but she can’t, and I have to understand that. Don’t you think your dad feels like that? With two girls that he loves very much, don’t you think he’d love to help you attend the college of your dreams? Maybe he tried doing that for your sister but then realized he just couldn’t swing it. I don’t see it as him being selfish; I see it as him being realistic financially. </p>

<p>I fortunately received quite a bit of merit and financial aid so that I could attend my university cost free, but I go to a state school that is not the best match for me academically. But you know what? That’s okay! It truly is. It’s not the best school I deserve to attend and it may not have the prestige that I’d like, but I know that my mom can’t help, and I certainly don’t want to throw myself into financial turmoil over 4 years. Sometimes you have to take your lot in life and upgrade it from within. By shining at an affordable college now, you may be able to make important contacts that can set you up in the future. You never know. </p>

<p>So, I’m sorry that you can’t afford your targeted school, but please consider other options and please give your dad some slack. I’m sure he’s trying really hard. It can’t be easy to be in your family’s situation.</p>

<p>My first thought was I hope this is a ■■■■■. But with the post count I doubt it, sorry to say. </p>

<p>OP, basic finance 101:
$45000/12 months = $3750/month
25% nominal tax rate → $2812/month</p>

<p>You want your father to pay 1/2 of his monthly income on your school? What about the loans for your sister? Food? Housing? Travel? Oy.</p>

<p>It doesn’t matter whether your dad is unreasonable or not (I think he is being reasonable). If he will. It pay for this college, you cannot attend. Time to find plan B.</p>

<p>Paintgirl417, find a college you can afford. It may be a community college to start. You are not entitled to any college and your father isn’t obligated to pay for that college. Understand that the inability to make reasonable financial decisions is a national problem. With your plan to be an orthopedic surgeon, you will have a minimum of 4+4+5 years where your loans will rack up interest. Make the most rational and frugal decision now so your future, and your father’s retirement, isn’t ruined by debt.</p>

<p>My dad pays my sisters education $400 a month. Her school is $38,000. I am 17 hears old and I turn 18 in the middle of the semester. The " school" down the street from me is William and Mary. Aint no way im getting in. The Community College in my area has a reputation for students not attending 4 year colleges. My original plan was to do a gap year. The $5000 i paid to go to china is gone because my mother and 28 year old sister told me I needed to go to school and not “waste” my time. That money I used went to a laptop and other expenses for school. When i moved to williamsburg 2 years ago is wasnt on purpose, my house got foreclosed on, my mother went to jail, and my grandfather died and my father is obligated to take care of her. There is no way around that when you are caribbean and a primary staple in your life is 1. Family and 2. TO GET AN EDUCATION.</p>

<p>I applied to 11 schools. Half waitlisted and then denied me. 2 of them accepted me. One in south carolina and the other in Pennsylvania. The the rest I got denied. The other school gave me less in financial aid than Cedar Crest.</p>

<p>

How about the the Virginia Community College System?

See [William</a> & Mary - Transferring from a Virginia Community College](<a href=“http://www.wm.edu/admission/undergraduateadmission/applytransferstudent/vccs_students/index.php]William”>http://www.wm.edu/admission/undergraduateadmission/applytransferstudent/vccs_students/index.php)</p>

<p>Sorry about my previous post. It should have said…if your father cannot or will not pay for the school in PA, you can NOT attend.</p>

<p>You live in VA where there are a TON of really good, and well priced public universities. WM and UVA are not the only acts in VA. The breadth of public universities is enviable. </p>

<p>At this point, I’m not sure you are going to have a choice about that gap year. If no one is going to pay the cost of attendance at that PA school, you will either need to take a gap year, work, and reapply to a better choice of schools for fall 2014, OR go and talk to that CC near you and find out what kind of articulation agreements the CC has with four year colleges inn your state.</p>

<p>Don’t rely on what you have “heard” about that community college. The reality is that IF you want to matriculate at a four year school after attending the CC, you will be able to especially if the school has those articulation agreements…and you do well.</p>

<p>I will stick my neck out here and say…this year you applied to the wrong list of colleges.</p>

<p>You need a gap year AT HOME not in China. You need to get a job, any job and start saving your own money for college. You need to go visit your local CC and speak directly with the Transfer Advisor about the steps to follow to be able to transfer out after starting there.</p>

<p>Your mother and sister clearly have your best interests at heart, but rather flimsy notions about college finance.</p>

<p>Take a gap year. Make a new and better college application list for yourself. You need to get your education in an affordable manner.</p>

<p>NO he is being perfectly reasonable. The reasonable thing for you to have done was to apply to a few Safeties (schools that you are sure you can get in and can afford). Now you are looking at a Gap year or CC. Take ownership of your college decisions, make the most of it and, don’t blame anyone. </p>

<p>I understand your family is going through a lot but you’re better off accepting what’s doable.</p>

<p>It doesn’t mean a dang thing that others who go to your local CC don’t go on to 4 year schools. In no way does that stop YOU from going. </p>

<p>BTW…If you don’t have what it takes to get into Wm and Mary at some point, then you may not have what it takes to get into med school. </p>

<p>Go to your CC for two years, do well, and then apply to Wm and Mary.</p>

<p>I agree.
You need to save as much money as possible & you need to bring your grades WAY up.
Ds & Fs don’t prepare you for college work.</p>

<p>While I don’t believe your Dad is being unreasonable how is it that he agreed to pay for your sibling but not for you? Did she get merit aid or scholarships that you weren’t able to get?</p>

<p>Yes I live in virginia. However, the community college in my area is NOT at all in any way good. They have those marticulation agreements yes. But like I said, a lot of the people I went to school here with say the teachers are not very good. Second. I applied to Sweet Briar, Hollins U, American U, Cedar Crest, Howard, Spelman, Converse, Agnes Scott, Meredith, Goucher, Simmons and Welsyan College. I had 4 reaches on my list. As well as a 3-4 safeties on my list.</p>

<p>Did converse give good aid? Nice school and I think would be good alternative to large state school</p>