Is My Life Over Already? What should I do?

College Search & Selection
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<p>In almost any field, individuals who graduate from the top colleges, specifically Ivy League Schools, get a large boost in terms of salary. Although I have worked hard my entire high school career for a chance to gain a highly coveted seat at one of these schools, I doubt that I will be admitted simply because of the sheer volume of applicants. I have absolutely no "hook" besides the one or two activities that I have started, have mediocre extracurricular activities (a few state medals and awards), and good grades and test scores, and am of Asian descent, so I will probably be handed rejection letters by most of the colleges that I applied to.</p>

<p>I was already rejected from Stanford EA, and did not receive an invitation to apply to the UCLA Regents Scholarship, the UCLA Almuni Scholarship (for top 10% of applicants), and the UC Berkeley Regents and Chancellor Scholarship. </p>

<p>It seems that the effort I put into my grades were wasted (I shall not waste time complaining about my extracurriculars because it is pretty clear that I wasted the effort I put into those), since I will not be getting admission into the top schools. Thus, I humble myself before you today to seek advice for the rest of my life. What should I do? Is there any hope left for me? It seems that I am doomed to mediocrity for eternity, which is especially painful because I am a perfectionist.</p>

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<p>A career in ■■■■■■■■ seems likely.</p>

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<p>^^^lol!!!</p>

<p>Powerbond one step at a time.</p>

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<p>Move to Canada. Or join the Marines.</p>

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<p>Nope - not necessarily. RPI, Polytechnic U, and Santa Clara grads are in the top 20 nationally in salaries. A lot of top-ranked Us are in there too, but that’s because they attract top students, not because their diplomas exert a magic influence.</p>

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<p>Indian American AND Asian??? </p>

<p>How about that! Go ■■■■■ elsewhere!</p>

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<p>I do not understand why you guys think that I am ■■■■■■■■, because I am expressing a legitimate concern. Asking for advice is not ■■■■■■■■.</p>

<p>Moreover, I never mentioned that I was Indian American in the post, so I assumed that you pulled it out of a previous “Chance Me” post that I had posted a month ago. If you look at those, you would see that I do not have a trend of “■■■■■■■■.”</p>

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<p>Finally, India is a subcontinent of Asia, so Indians are Asians.</p>

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<p>You will be your perfectionist-self at a school that WANTS you. That school will ultimately be the right school for you. You can be very successful in life at ANY school.
A life of mediocrity because of someone’s else hard work or an admissions department, which is overwhelmed with applications? PLEASE!
I know it seems terrible now, but read the threads of those who didnt get in their “dream schools.” Go and live and enjoy your life. Make the college you get into the greatest experience of your life. Be happy with your personal achievements. Then the rest will follow.</p>

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<p>Posts like this are hard to read: I spent today in the company of a Rwandan high school student who is waiting for her high school exit exam results and praying desperately for a scholarship because her alternative, as sole support for a family of 4, is menial work for the rest of her life. </p>

<p>You really, really need to get some perspective.</p>

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<p>^I wonder if it’s a good thing to always compare our situation to the “it could be so much worse” type of thing.</p>

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<p>I’ve posted this idea a gazillion times. </p>

<p>College admissions has nothing to do with your “worth” as a human being. Top colleges don’t even PURPORT to admit the best qualified or most deserving applicants. It’s all about buidling a class. </p>

<p>What does that mean? Well, think of the high school musical director who is choosing a cast for a show. I like to use “Guys and Dolls” as the example. The director isn’t going to choose the 35 most talented singers, dancers and actors and make them the cast. She needs to cast so many males, so many females, so many sopranos, altos, etc. She needs to cast particular roles. She may take work her prior experience with those auditioning into account. </p>

<p>Unless it’s a rather unusual high school, lots more girls than boys will try out. One part is “Nicely Nicely,” who sings “Sit Down, You’re Rocking the Boat.” It is supposed to be sung in a deep voice. It’s traditionally played by a plump guy. Now, the supply of plump young men with good, deep voices at any high school is usually quite limited, so it would be surprising if there are more than 2 or 3 young men vying for that role. </p>

<p>Meanwhile, there are probably a lot of young girls with good soprano voices trying out for the role of Sarah Brown. In choosing the young girl to play Sarah, the teacher may take into account the fact that one candidate is a full six inches taller than the young man she plans to cast as Sky Masterson (Sarah’s love interest). So, in choosing her Sarah, the casting director may make the decision based solely on the fact that one of the best sopranos is shorter than the boy playing Sky is. </p>

<p>When the cast list comes out, the best soprano in the class may be stunned when she learns that she is not Sarah Brown. Nobody is going to tell her the only reason is that she’s six inches taller than the young man playing Sky. She looks down the list. Adelaide (sp?) is the next best part. She’s stunned. She didn’t get that either. Why? It’s a comic role and this young girl simply isn’t a comedienne. </p>

<p>If our young soprano decides based on this experience that she has no talent, she’s a darn fool. It’s reality that should she try to become a professional, she probably has more of a chance of succeeding than the young man who is going to play Nicely Nicely and probably a better chance than the girl who beat her out for the role of Sarah. (Teen boys grown into taller men.) </p>

<p>Admission to a top college works much the same way. In a very real sense, you aren’t competing against everyone in the applicant pool for admission; you’re competing against those who can play the same “role” or “roles.” So, at most top colleges, about 15% of the places will be reserved for athletes. You’re not an athlete, so those spots are irrelevant to you. About 10% will go to internationals; that’s a tougher pool in most cases, but again it’s irrelevant to you. Some places will go to URMs. Again, you’re not one, so that’s not a role you can play. Keep whittling down the number of places in the class you are competing for. </p>

<p>At this point it is, of course, unknown whether you will be one of the lucky ones. I’m not purporting to estimate your chances of admission. I am only telling you that you are the equivalent of a soprano trying for the high school play. The competition is intense because lots of kids can play the same role you can play in a college class.</p>

<p>If you don’t get in, you’d be as foolish as the soprano in my anecdote if you conclude anything at all about your merit. (And conversely, if you do get in, you’d be foolish to conclude that you are better qualified or more deserving than those who did not. ) </p>

<p>For some kids, there will be a next round. Top graduate and professional schools don’t have varsity sports teams. They don’t have orhestras, except some that are just “for fun.” Admissions tends to be more straight forward. </p>

<p>Finally, you didn’t waste your time studying in high school. The skills you developed doing so will help you succeed in college, no matter which college you end up attending.</p>

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<p>Moderator’s Note: Unless I missed something (and please correct me if I did), when asked in a previous thread if they were SE Asian, the OP stated that they were “Indian American” which technically is true. Unfortunately they did not realize that they needed to clarify this so that members would not read it as “American Indian”, ie. a URM.</p>

<p>When a member is suspected to be a ■■■■■, please use the Report Problem Post button.</p>

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<p>If you take some time to read Powerbond’s previous posts, you will see that my perspective is “really, really” clear.
This is about the thread post, not about how you spent your day.</p>

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<p>So Jonri - you’re the CCer who created the “casting the HS musical” analogy! I’ve used that many times in talking to HS students who are getting ready to apply to college. I think it’s a very valuable tool and an important message for young people, both factually and psychologically. If people on this thread haven’t read Jonri’s post in its entirety, you need to go back and read it.</p>

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<p>^rubykidd, I assume you are responding to M’s Mom post. I believe her comments were intended for the OP, not you.</p>

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<p>OP said: “In almost any field, individuals who graduate from the top colleges, specifically Ivy League Schools, get a large boost in terms of salary.”</p>

<p>Not true . . . depends on many other factors, incklduing the relative worth of the college IN THE FIELD one chooses. Take Cal Poly SLO and Harvey Mudd in engineering, or Lehigh in Aeronautical Engineering, or RPI for Game Design.</p>

<p>It’s like asking “what is the best car.” The answer is Ferrari, right? Unless you need 4 wheel drive or space for a family or high gas mileage or off-road capability . . . or if you only have $25k to spend.</p>

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<p>I am so sorry M’s Mom!</p>

<p>Thank you for the clarity, Bobby CT!</p>

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<p>no problem, rubykidd.</p>

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<p>gadad, I didn’t create the “casting the musical” analogy. I’ve no idea who did. It’s been around a long time. I do think I MAY be the first person to have posted it on CC and I have repeated it many times. (I was surprised a while back when I got a PM from one of the official college reps here after I posted it again saying that he had never heard it before and was going to use it. He thought it was apt. )</p>

<p>I really do think so many kids have the attitude of powerbond. They’ve done x,z, and z in order to get into a top college. If it doesn’t work out, they think they’ve “wasted” their time. It’s genuinely sad. It’s also untrue. </p>

<p>I do wish students and parents would grasp the fact that college admissions is not a measure of self-worth. It really, truly isn’t. Getting into HYPSMC, etc. is not a prize for a job “well done” either. There are lots more kids who did “good jobs” than there are admissions slots and who gets them is based on other things. It’s all about building a class.</p>