<p>Well said Soozievt. It really comes down to a family decision based on multiple factors. </p>
<p>I would not change the decision we made of public school for children. They are having a wonderful time and doing well academically. We are blessed to have a great public school and I completely understand that many people do not. We moved from the city of Chicago to the suburbs when our children were babies specifically for the purpose of finding a school district that they would do well in.</p>
<p>the public school system where i live is so bad that it was taken over by the state last spring…it is arguably the worst school district in the entire country…that is why i had no choice but to go to a private school…i bet 25% of the teachers would fail the 12th grade if they had to start in the fall and go through the spring</p>
<p>I’ve come to feel that the prep/public debate misses the point. The better public districts compete with the privates for the same type of student. A good public school district requires some money, just as a private school does. The property taxes on our 40-year-old ranch house are huge. We could have bought a house is a cheaper district with mediocre schools and spent the difference on private school, but we wanted our children to live near their schoolmates and be part of the community. My husband went to boarding school, and I went to a public high school. We both went to selective colleges and ended up with decent careers. The important thing is to get your child into a learning environment where it is more socially acceptable to be smart and high-achieving than it is to be mediocre and incurious. Whether that’s public or private doesn’t matter all that much.</p>
<p>P.S. there are many expensive privates where wealthy parents warehouse their problem kids. Buyer beware.</p>
<p>I need some help with my dilemma. S is soph at rigorous public HS. A very hard working B student. He was just tested, since his test scores consistently bring his grades down. It turns out he is not LD, but an out of the box thinker. Now my question, does he stay with the public school, being tutored in how to take tests, or invest a lot of money to send him to The Masters School, with the Harkness way of teaching?</p>
<p>Momma4,</p>
<p>My children attend - one recently graduated from - a Harkness school. The focus is on interactive discussion with the teacher facilitating the conversation. This is most valuable in English, history and the humanities, but much less so for math and science. Although students use the Harkness table in math and science classes, they are taught traditionally in labs and lectures. The curriculum is similar to other schools - my kids took multiple AP classes, and they obviously had to be prepared for the tests. In our experience, the most valuable part of Harkness is the focus on discussion - students learn to express their thoughts and views about the topic at hand. That, and there is no sitting in the back of the classroom and opting out of participation. If your son would benefit from discussion and participation, a Harkness school may be for him.</p>
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<p>I believe you will find quite the opposite. The huge majority of prep schools are extremely intolerant of discipline problems and are quick to expel students for many violations that would go undetected or be ignored in a public school. Especially if a student boards- he or she is on the clock 24/7.</p>
<p>The thing we are happiest about is the great friendships our kiddos have developed and nurtured. They had a few acquaintances in public grade and middle school but their deep lasting friendships have been those which developed with kids who attended their private HS with them. Some of these friendships developed more in college but did start in HS.</p>
<p>S had two AP computer classes with 3 students in them. Both my kids found the learning environment in private school much less distracting than the public school, where a LOT of time was devoted to handling constant discipline issues. As far as I know, there were virtually no discipline issues in their HS, as it was NOT tolerated.</p>
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<p>Both of the above quotes have been our experience also. Discipline is dealt with very swiftly - even in cases of students that are school “stars”. No special treatment. And the students are all very aware when someone gets tossed out - it is a deterrent, I think. The stories that I’ve heard from S’s friends who are now in public high school about some discipline issues would never be tolerated at his school.</p>
<p>In our experience at our public high school, with tracked academic classes, there weren’t discipline problems in the highest level classes (Honors mostly at our HS), and tend to be more the kids who were not as motivated type learners in lower tracked classes. If you have an academic achiever, at least from my experience, the discipline issues tend not to arise much in the harder classes. The only time my kids came into contact with kids who had discipline issues of any significance was in untracked classes like health or gym class.</p>
<p>I think private secondary school as an “industry” is a lot like private college, only in a much smaller scale. Almost anything you can generalize about private vs. public college can apply to private vs public high schools. So, back to OP’s question, I’d say if you can afford or get enough FA/scholarship to attend a top tier private school, it’s a no-brainer. If you have to stretch hard to make it happen, then it’s probably not worth it. High school is not the end of the journey of formal education, and you have to consider how to fund college education. Another variable to consider is what public school option you have locally (just like if you have UCB as your public college option, you’d be much pickier about what private college you’d attend and give up UCB for a great education a lot cheaper).</p>
<p>Our S is a senior at a private school and did not get into an Ivy (two legacies got in ahead of him w/lesser achievements) but he’ll get into a good private or public honors program regardless. The value of his school is the learning environment and challenging curriculum that will make college all that much easier. Had he gone to our good public HS, he still may have gotten into the same universities but I think his skills, habits, and outlook would not have been as good.</p>
<p>When I was growing up my parents sent my sibling and I to private school for grades 1-12 (funny that my mom preferred the local elementary school for K as it was just a block away). When I had my own children I was pretty idealistic and decided to send them to public school so they could learn to live in the “real world”.</p>
<p>When my oldest child went to college I asked him if he felt that he was well prepared or if all the kids from private schools had an advantage. He happily replied that he felt his high school had done a great job in preparing him for college and that he was right up there with the best of the students. I felt a lot of relief and prided myself on my good decision.</p>
<p>As child 2 has entered senior year of high school, I am amazed by the amount of effort he puts into all of his classes. His teachers have commented that he “works like a dog”. He is (even if I do say so myself) an outstanding student that should get into a top school. I asked him one day why he worked so hard (why can’t you settle for an A instead of an A+?). His reply, “I have to get into a really good college so I can get a better job than you and dad. That way I can send my kids to private school, public school sucks”!</p>
<p>Can’t win!</p>
<p>Sounds like you have won–both your kids have a very strong work ethic had have gotten a great public education. They have learned many lessons that are not taught in the textbooks by attending public school. My kiddos went to public schook K-8 & then private school for HS. It worked pretty well for both of them. D noted that some of the kids who attended K-12 had stronger bonds than those who were just there for HS (or shorter than K-12), but generally both kids agree that they learned a lot about getting along with a variety of people by attending public school (since private school has a lot more selection bias). It saved us A LOT of money (since the private school tuition is about $10K/year & now up to $17K/year) per child. This has allowed us more options for helping pay our kids’ college.</p>
<p>Not sure what the answer is to OP’s question, but I can give my anecdotal experience. Son #1 graduated from our public HS, in a middle class town. Daughter graduates this year from Catholic HS a few towns over, son #2 a sophomore at Catholic school, son #3 an 8th grader at private prep school and will attend that school for HS. No question that daughter’s and son #2’s education more demanding and rigorous than son #1’s. No difference in class sizes, but the lack of discipline problems and other problems and the almost universally more “college prep” approach of the kids at the Catholic high school (90% go to 4 year colleges, vs about 55% at public hs) makes for a much stronger academic environment–more is asked and expected from the kids, daughter and son #2 have to work much harder to get the same grades son #1 did at public hs. Son #1 was in all top classes, graduated with about a 3.5(uw), really did not have to work very hard. Son #2 and daughter work much harder to get those grades. Son #4’s school at another level–classes of 8, 9 and 10 students, a ton of individual attention, lots of enrichment type stuff. Public schools, and for that matter Catholic schools, just cannot match that. Son#4 is getting a superior education, I guess I am getting what I am paying for, and I think it is worth it FOR HIM. All of that being said–I know a number of kids who went to top prep schools who say that they feel like they started out well ahead of most public school kids, but that everyone who worked reasonably hard pretty well caught up by end of freshman year. There are non-academic factors as well–son #1 had a tremendous social/athletic experience at our public, I’m not sure he could have gotten if he had gone elsewhere, and he is a pretty happy, well adjusted young man, no complaints. So, is it worth it? I don’t know that there is a one size fits all answer. I think you just try to do what is best for each of your kids, depending on your best judgment about what will work for that kid.</p>