In 2010, my mom was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, a neurodegenerative disease. I have witnessed her transformation from fiercely independent, to dependent on my brother, dad, and me. Before the disease, she did it all. She gardened, cooked, mowed the lawn, did laundry, and did everything for us kids. She was lively and social, and she chaperoned all of our school trips. She was everything I wanted to be. Now, all of that has been taken from her. She can’t spend as much time outside, cooking and doing laundry drains her, and she’s not nearly as social, because she can’t drive herself. Despite how difficult the situation has been for me, I know I haven’t experienced even a fraction of what she has, and I fear someday I will.
Multiple Sclerosis is a multifactorial disorder, meaning it is caused by a combination of environmental factors and genetics. Since my mom has it, this puts me at a higher risk than most people. Additionally, MS can emerge at any time, with some people being as young as 20 when they are diagnosed. This knowledge hangs over me, a constant reminder that life is truly short. This motivates me every day to strengthen my mind and body, and to achieve as much as I can. In reality, I may never get MS. But if I do, or if I get any number of other debilitating diseases that one can get, I want to be as prepared as possible. This has changed my mindset from one of “I’ll worry about it later” to “I’ll deal with it now”. When people have told me that I don’t need to know what I want to do with my life yet, that some people don’t know until they’re almost through college or even later, I have responded that I want to know now. This has driven me to shadow at the hospital, research different careers, and take classes geared towards future health professionals. This sense of urgency also drives me to learn as much as I can every single day. If I ever do get MS, one of the impacts would be decreased memory and cognitive ability. If that day comes, I want to be satisfied with the amount I’ve learned. I want my brain to be strong so I can continue working for as long as possible. If that day never comes, and I never get MS, then I’ll only be better off having learned as much as possible.
My mother’s disability has been truly eye-opening to me, and has impacted everything I do. If I ever do get Multiple Sclerosis, I want to be able to handle it with as much grace and strength as she has, and that motivates me every single day.
(Sorry for the long post, I appreciate any feedback I can get on this!)