<p>This is for option 3 of the Common App Personal Essay, Just give me an honest critique, Thanks!:</p>
<p>Mom, are you ok? I said for the second time. The panic in my voice was definitely becoming more noticeable. Yea, she said again, but I knew something wasnt right. Her right foot was stomping sporadically and she was starting to sweat pretty heavily. I called my dad down and the first thing he asked her was, did you eat your breakfast? When she said no, he immediately led her to the couch. It was this moment that irrevocably changed my life forever. In just a few moments my mother completely changed. She could barely speak, aside from some nonsensical mumbling. I quickly called my two aunts who lived close by and told them to come over. As soon as they came over they quickly got to work. Along with my dad they slowly got my mom to drink some tea. After what seemed like a few hours, my mom slowly regained her composure. After my mom was feeling better, I was extremely relieved. When I asked my aunt what had happened to my mom she told me she had Type 1 Diabetes. </p>
<p>My mom came from fairly humble beginnings. She was born in India in 1967 and along with her parents, lived in a house with three younger sisters. When she was six years old she moved to the States where she lived an impoverished life with her family while both of her parents worked full time jobs. At twelve years old she got a part-time job at the local laundromat collecting the coins out of the machines, all the while taking care of her three younger sisters. At eighteen she graduated high school and got a job at the small offices of Rosedale Nurseries Inc. a landscaping and plant nursery firm. At forty-two my mom still works at the same business although now shes an Administrative Assistant.</p>
<p>I was pretty young at the time my mom had her episode so you can understand how large of an impression that made on me. I vividly remember that moment and can easily say it was one of the most life changing situations Ive ever been through. Its pretty tough living with a loved one and seeing them have to suffer through complications like that. I think it was after that moment I realized I wanted to do something to help my mom and others like her. As high school continued I was repeatedly drawn in to each of my science classes. Towards the end of my junior year I looked into biological sciences as a college major and subsequent schools that offered it. My passions for science and wanting to help others with life-altering diseases like my mother turned me towards a career in research. I want to make a difference for others who are in similar situations as I was with my mom. </p>
<p>While my mom didnt go to college, she lived what many hope to when they come to the United States the American dream. She came to the States to live a better life and create one for her children. Her resilience and hardworking nature has definitely rubbed off on me. In me, my mom instilled an appetite for life, a passion that makes me want to do more, be more, cherish every single moment, and live my life to the fullest. I am a stronger person, because of her; because through struggles and hardships, she has never given up on hope for a better life for her children.</p>