<p>I applied to Vassar and truth be told, it is my number one school but I am a VERY introverted person. By that, I mean I never speak in class, I have "temporary" friends but not solid ones, and NEVER participate in anything school related! People always ask me if I am ok but I am just naturally quiet and timid by nature. I have a few teachers who singled me out in classes and harassed me for it in front of the ENTIRE class, which only made me even more quiet and focused on getting out of the class instead of learning itself.
I never went to school dances or Prom and probably not even going to my graduation. My self esteem is soo low and I always have a bully or two picking on me every once in a while. I'm smart but when it comes to public speaking or working in groups with people in class, I often freeze and slur my language so they think I'm dumb and are surprised when I get the highest score in the class. I saw college as an outlet for change but it is going to take a while for me to change and if I go to a place where EVERYONE is extroverted I will just freeze more.
Seeing videos of the college itself of Youtube, I see everyone as being outgoing and always doing lots of interesting things. I want to be a doctor which means I really have to be out there and be able to express myself and work with different groups of people but I am naturally introverted and timid. People are always saying this is wrong and I have problems. I really DONT!!
Will I fit in at Vassar? Is everyone extroverted? Truth be told, if I do get accepted, I'll probably be in the library all the time :P</p>
<p>I don’t think it’s humanly possible to have an entire school of extroverted people and certainly not at Vassar. There’s always one or two quiet ones in the classes I’ve taken. You will definitely have opportunities to explore and try new things in clubs or academics. And I’d encourage you to take some chances socially. I don’t think I’ve heard of a single case of bullying while here and no one is keeping track if you go to all the dances and raves. And as long as you find something you’re interested in doing on campus, I’m sure you can find at least one other person also interested.</p>
<p>Also, if you get in, choose your classes wisely. History and English classes are HIGHLY discussion and participation oriented. But many of those are truly wonderful, so if you work up the courage, do try one! Explore! Also, you’re going for a pre-med track I assume, and I’ve heard from a former roommate (now accepted to med school), that they are mainly lecture, not discussion-based. So that’s working for you. However, you are going to have lab partners and some form of social interaction would ease the situation. 
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<p>But a brief warning: In many departments, class participation is a MAJOR part of your grade. These are not freebie points, but you do actually have to speak in class once in a while. Now online posts or talking one-on-one with a prof outside of class can make up for this, but participation is key to academic success. And yes, on occasion you may have to do a class presentation. But when you do, just remember, most of the people up there are just as nervous as you. No lie. Thinking back on all the classes I’ve done presentations in, every time only about 10-20% of people look seriously comfortable up there.</p>
<p>And you probably want to do research, so you want to have a good, sociable relationship with your professors so they give you those research positions! I promise this helps. I got an internship in my department not only because I had the grades and skills, but also because I could communicate with other students and make them feel at ease about tutoring them.</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>Assuming you are not pulling our leg, you are going to have problems on ANY campus, not just Vassar.</p>
<p>^ Haha well I know that. I really want to come to terms with my fears slowly. I have been battling with shyness all my life and the fact that I’m not the regular teen, meaning I don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, or drool over Rob Pattinson nightly, it makes it even harder to find people who like me for me. I don’t do well in large groups, but when you really get to know me I’m really funny, am very opinionated, and greatly enjoy philosophy and cinema(and I want to be a doctor, go figure!)</p>
<p>I just found Vassar to be very close-knit which scares me because I don’t want to be that person that always sticks out as it has happened a lot of times in my classes. One teacher asked me if I was antisocial in front of the whole class because I chose not to work with the rest of my classmates which he said was optional to do. The kids laughed at me and instead of feeling bad for me, they wanted to get away from me. Please understand I am no ■■■■■, but I am a very sensitive individual.</p>
<p>Which is better: a large state school or a small liberal arts college?</p>
<p>I think Vassar would be a good fit for you and sincerely hope you get in. I could also see you at Kenyon, Oberlin, or any other small liberal arts schools with smarter kids. College can be much harder initially to be introverted, but not to worry, there wil be plenty of people that will drag you out of your shell eventually. Larger schools would not be easy for you – think you would continue to “hide”. Definitely, go to a smaller school! You will not believe how different you are going to be in the coming years. I was once VERY shy in High School and completely changed in college. Please ignore people that attack you for being shy (and I agree that it has a lot to do with self-esteem). They are just compounding the issue and you don’t deserve that.</p>
<p>Vassar would be an excellent choice for you. You will need to work on your shyness and I can’t think of a more accepting community than Vassar for you to try to become a little more social. There are socially awkward kids at Vassar, as well as very social people and many in between. The thing that makes Vassar different is that if you are a nice person, you will fit in. People will accept you for who you are. You will have a small Fellow Group and a Fellow Leader in your house (dorm). From what I have heard, these groups are very supportive of each other and the leaders try to look out for every member of the group. These groups are also as diverse as the campus as a whole and the few socially awkward kids in each group are treated with respect. No one is going to bully you or push you to try things you don’t want to try. But, there will be huge opportunities for you to grow if you are willing. The class participation will be hard to avoid, but that is true of any small LAC. The huge social benefits for a shy person at a place like Vassar far out weigh the fact that you will need to speak in class. This is far better than being lost in huge lecture classes at a major university. While the lecture style may be more comfortable for you, the social scene at the large schools often have a similar feel to what you experience in high school, with peer pressure and some degree of bullying. Vassar is one of the more mature communities where people tend to treat everyone with respect, regardless of who you are or what you are in to.</p>
<p>Vassar, or any small liberal arts college, will be a great place for you to grow - as long as you are ready to challenge yourself. (I also would recommend counseling - having someone working with you one on one to overcome your anxiety would be very helpful).</p>
<p>If you want to be able to fade into the background and never be asked a question in class, and avoid a social environment where people are more likely to know your name and want you involved, then I would say go for the large anonymous university with over 300 students in a class. You won’t have any pressure to grow and change, though, and I think in the long run it won’t be as good a decision.</p>
<p>If I were you, I’d rather be in the most nurturing environment I could find - somewhere that will push you out of your comfort zone, and support you while you are there.</p>
<p>Mypencil, I really, really hope that you applied to Carnegie Mellon. It is a very warm and friendly place for even the most introverted students.</p>
<p>And no matter where you end up, realize that probably nobody will know you there. The students, teachers, know nothing about you. You can be whomever you want to, and start out the way you’d like to be. There is no baggage, no backround except for that which you choose to carry with you. You can pick subjects and teachers you enjoy, which will make you desire to speak up more. You will have access to so many clubs and activities, where you can make friends. Forget the bad times of high school…these can be the best years of your life!</p>
<p>VassarGrad, one of your posts about the medical culture in Vassar is the reason why I seriously applied to this school 
(sorry if that’s creepy)</p>
<p>Did you have the shy, awkward kids in those classes or was it one big happy family? What were the teachers in those departments like?</p>
<p>mypencil, I recommend that you send that last post as a pm to vassargrad. People have a tendency to post and then forget they did, or not check. For example, I was just reading this thread and hadn’t even realized that I posted on it. Send a pm if you really want a response!</p>
<p>Thanks so much busdriver! I just did it, fingers crossed!</p>
<p>Any more suggestions?</p>
<p>I can’t speak about Vassar specifically, but here’s a general suggestion:</p>
<p>Most colleges offer counseling services ranging from one-on-one sessions to group sessions. Better yet, most of it is free (because it is included in your tuition/fees/etc.). Groups typically form at the beginning of a semester, and they may be about anything from LGBTQ issues to women-in-science to assertiveness training. While you might think it’s scary to work out your shyness in a group of people, that might actually be the perfect place! The group tends to be a safe and supportive place, and it’s facilitated by a professional. Counseling at college isn’t just for mental health crises anymore!</p>
<p>Ms. PencilCase, </p>
<p>I hear that there are plenty of socially awkward kids at Vassar - my son just was accepted Early Decision II and he might be one of them! (depending on how comfortable he feels in this new situation). One thing I like is that you’re assigned to one sophomore/junior on your corridor (I forget what they call that position) who is there as a kind of peer counselor to help you adjust to college life etc. I think the more confident you feel in your dorm (which is your home) the more easily you’ll be able to extend that to speaking in classes.</p>
<p>I agree with everyone who suggests that you might do well to think about expanding your repetoire of social behaviors, perhaps via a group counseling situation, at whatever college you go to. If you fulfill your dream of becoming a doctor you will eventually have to talk to patients and peers. There’s not much escaping the social world, no matter what you do in life! My impression, from what I’m reading, is that Vassar is a school that accepts and nurtures a lot of “different” sort of kids. I think you should give it a shot!</p>