Okay, you probably know me and that D has chosen Kenyon. Guess what? She is now wavering, because it’s the 11th hour and she is indecisive. Oberlin offered merit aid when they offered her a place.
Problem: She has never visited Oberlin. She really likes Kenyon, likes the students, the place, the professors, the feeling, “but what if Oberlin is better?” So now she needs to decide and let them know tomorrow.
What she likes about both schools:
She know both schools are similar in many ways. She know both will have fine academics, both have good career opportunities, etc… Things she likes about Oberlin: Excos, winter term, a bit bigger, in a town.
Unknown about Oberlin: the kids, in that she has only a general idea. Are they gothy? Are they all really political? Are they intense? Will a hip-nerd, quiet, normal girl fit in? Thoughts please (she asked me to post, so pretend you are talking to a teenager:-)
Is there any way you can ask Oberlin for an short extension and visit next week? My sense from visiting LACs with my D is that they each have their own vibe so fit is very important. I’d be hesitant to commit to a LAC before visiting. And if you haven’t done it yet read Fisk, Insiders Guide etc. reviews.
Even a weekend visit??? If you see Oberlin she would probably either feel comfortable choosing Oberlin or she will feel comfortable that Kenyon was the better choice for her.
Oberlin is a pretty special place. My son is going and he is certainly not gothy or highly political. I had never seen it and recently went to an accepted students day. To be honest, it far surpassed all my expectations. I didn’t get any heavily goth/extremist vibe at all. My son went to a science class and really loved how small and participatory it was and how smart and engaged the students were. We heard a couple of jazz combos that were phenomenal. My son is not a Con kid but music is pretty important to him so it’s a great fit. (FWFW he thought Kenyon was “uptight and boring” and didn’t apply. I know it’s a terrific place also – that was just his personal opinion and he visited both.) I would say that hip-nerd, quiet and normal would describe the vast majority of students we saw/interacted with throughout the day at Oberlin. That being said I think your D should go with her gut feeling either way - she can’t go wrong. And if she goes to Kenyon maybe my son’s best friend will get in off the waitlist!
Oberlin’s in the middle of finals right now so if she did visit what she’d see would not really be representative.
My opinion as someone close to, but not the parent of an Oberlin student is that it is a pretty political place even if not all kids are into activism. Do a search for “protest” on the school’s newspaper and you start to see what I mean. Add to that the Oberlin General Tsao’s controversy and the infamous demand letter.
That is not to say there’s anything wrong with student action. The Oberlin kid I know came home at Christmas energized by what was happening on campus, even if his parents felt it was a little over the top.
I agree that your D should try to get an extension of time and visit if she is seriously considering it. Hard to make a such a big commitment sight unseen. My D was admitted last year to both Kenyon and Oberlin and chose Oberlin, and she has been really happy there. She is a fairly shy, normal kid, and has found a wide range of friends there beyond the uber-political and arty/hipster types, including athletes, nerds and more mainstream kids - kind, open, smart kids. Her classes have been challenging and she has been extremely impressed with the both the faculty and the intellectual level of her classmates. She’s taken an Exco class and may teach one next year, and had a great Winter Term internship in NYC. There are a ton of events and activities, some you’d expect - great speakers, bands, art museum shows, service opportunities - and quirkier ones like midnight hide and seek in the library, a trip to a nearby roller rink with 80s music, rescue kittens housed at a town art gallery. The existence of the town of Oberlin itself, with the shops and restaurants, has been a big plus. D got to see Kenyon again recently when she visited her best friend, who ended up at Kenyon and has also been happy. Her thoughts were that Kenyon was absolutely beautiful and the right place for her friend (who is a little “preppier” than D) but that she was definitely glad she ended up at Oberlin.
If she loves Kenyon, my advice would be, don’t be tempted by the unknown. She knows she loves Kenyon, so why even consider somewhere else? After much much research, my own view is that the academics are equally strong, and there is no discernible difference, despite the US News rankings. We have visited both 5-6 times with two different kids, and they have very different feels, though on paper, seem very similar. For what its worth, both my second kid and his best friend thought they would love Oberlin and couldn’t get off campus fast enough.
What is different: Kenyon’s campus is lovely and bucolic. Oberlin’s campus, from my kids’ perspective, had not a single “lovely” building on campus (though the new Jazz building is striking and dramatic), and it is set up with town of Oberlin streets dissecting it. Technically, there is more of town than Gambier, in that the retail part of Oberlin is about 4 x 4 blocks, and the town is 40 minutes or so from Cleveland. Oberlin has food coops, no really strong sports, no greek life. Kenyon has one dining hall, some excellent sports, including soccer and swimming, and 30%, non-residential Greek life. Oberlin has gotten a lot of grief about its acutely PC atmosphere, including this year’s ethnic food naming debate.
They are both great schools, she loves Kenyon, why look back? The grass can always be greener, until you decide that you are staying on your side of the fence.
@daisychain and @abcdgoldfish thank you so much, and to all of you. She has read all this. Unfortunately, I seriously doubt they will extend it any longer, as it has already been a week and visitng simply isn’t possible in any timely fashion. She has had five AP exams to study for, and Grandma arrives tomorrow.
Chalk this up to very good reasons for trying to visit colleges before applying. We thought we would visit if she had been accepted. Her stats are very good, so we were surprised she wasn’t accepted. I can’t understand why they didn’t initially, if they are offering her merit now, but guess that’s yet another mystery of college admissions. Meanwhile, Kenyon paid for her flight to visit, so she has been there. And she shouldn’t have accepted the waitlist, because it’s just caused a lot of anxiety and stress, frankly. Guess that is a lesson too. ~X(
Here are a few thoughts that come to mind, maybe you’ll find something helpful:
It sounds like your daughter might just be having last minute cold feet – in which case, she should probably stick with her earlier decision.
Otherwise, I agree with all the recommendations to try to visit Oberlin, to get a sense of the place, one way or another.
We visited Kenyon and Oberlin (as well as a few other schools in Ohio) a couple of months ago with our son, a junior. He’s another kid looking for a somewhat quirky, less mainstream place. He liked Oberlin, but not Kenyon. Hard for me to say exactly why, although I think Oberlin being less mainstream gets pretty close. He gets a feeling for whether he’ll find the people, the campus, and the activities interesting. (Of other schools we visited, he liked Wooster but not Denison.)
Oberlin is known for being left-leaning and politically active (some would consider this a negative, some a positive).
I believe you’ve said that she has merit aid from Oberlin but not Kenyon; money is a big factor for us, so that would heavily influence the decision.
Sorry for all the drama folks. She emailed Oberlin to thank them for the offer, but she isn’t accepting it. I think @csdad2 was right, just cold feet. And sorry, @abcdgoldfish , please give my regrets to your friend’s son:-)
I have visited both and think Kenyon is better for your daughter, based on your descriptions of her on this forum. I’m sure she would be happy at both, but my gut is saying “Kenyon” so I’m glad that’s what she choose. (Oberlin might have been too political; Kenyon more comfortable for her personality.) Best of luck with the end of AP tests to her.
I attended Oberlin, and my daughter is going to Kenyon. I love Oberlin, but I’d NEVER recommend that someone commit to attending without having first visited. People tend to have strong reactions to the place one way or the other (D1 really didn’t like it; D2 thinks she may die if she doesn’t get in when she applies in a few years).
Just wanted to say I think your daughter made the right decision given that she has had no exposure to Oberlin as a place or a culture.