<p>I’m curious too. If your mom has a credit card,pay the credit card deposit and pay it off right away . Problem solved and no interest.</p>
<p>As I noted, the deposit doesn’t need to be paid until May 1st. </p>
<p>I personally have been in the situation of being overwhelmed by debt, and the process of getting beyond that involved being very disciplined about using the credit card. If I told myself it was “only for emergencies” - I had to stick by that. </p>
<p>The bottom line is that it is not necessary for EC’s mom to charge $300 right now. EC’s place at Knox is secure and the mom can wait to 4/30. </p>
<p>I understand that it seems silly and trivial to people who are accustomed to having good cash flow. I’m in that position now, but it wasn’t all that long ago that things were different for me. I remember a time when I had to go through my bills each month and switch off between which creditors would get paid on time a which bills I could delay – I just didn’t have the money to pay everything on time, so the logical thing seemed to be to juggle so no particular creditor would see me as being habitually late. </p>
<p>I’d note that if the mom carries a balance on her card she will be charge interest on whatever amounts she charges, even if she pays the extra charges right away. The interest accrue from day #1 of the charge. </p>
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Probably because the mom knows her husband too well to believe that will happen.</p>
<p>My mom doesn’t think my dad will pay her back and he already owes her a lot of money. My mom also has over $1,000 on it and used it for our dental appointments, so she doesn’t want to put any more money on it. I have begged and begged her and even tried telling her to do the “bill me later” thing, but she won’t budge. My dad’s credit was too bad for him to do it. The IRS check should be coming any day.</p>
<p>Oh and thanks for the kind words calmom! I will def try and stick around. I’ve learned a lot from this process. In all honestly, the financial aid process was much more complicated for my family then the application process.</p>
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<p>ec, many posters have been trying to tell you to pay attention to the financial aspects throughout this whole process. You were hell bent on finding the perfect school for yourself, and while admirable, you ignorded the financial side of it. If your parents are bickering about the $300 deposit, what is going to happen when the tuition bills come due? I would hate for all your hard work to come crashing down, but seriously you have to address these issues now!</p>
<p>I disagree. I applied to 16 colleges because of financial aid. Clark and Earlham are also affordable options. Wheaton would be stretching the $$$. My dad is getting a 20k bill next month and plans to pay off the 8k in one payment, so the tuition and room and board issue will no longer be an issue. Also, the comment you quoted, I was specifically talking about how complicated the financial aid process is. We had a lot of problems with the IDOC, CSS Profile, Verification, etc.</p>
<p>ec, I am not meaning to unload on you, but there have been so many red flags over your entire process. To me, you saying that dad is getting a check for 20K but mom won’t put down the $300 depoisit screams that something is not awry. Calmom, I too have juggled bills and had to decide what to pay this month or next. But that is different than putting a deposit (usually refundable) by credit card for your son, and not trusting your husband to pay it back with a 20K check the next billing cycle.</p>
<p>GA2012Mom, with all due respect, your posts #144 is totally false (EC has been concerned about finances all along, which is why he cast a wide net among colleges that would award both merit and need based aid)… and it is highly rude and inappropriate for you to be trying to drive a wedge between EC & his family.</p>
<p>If I was EC’s mom, in her position, I probably would have said no to the credit card too. The deposit is NOT DUE until May 1st. There is no way in the world if money was tight for me that I would put ANYTHING on a credit card prior to the time I needed to.</p>
<p>EC happens to be anxious, but in this case the anxiety is misplaced. The deposit is due May 1, not before.</p>
<p>Wow, I am not trying to drive a wedge between ec’s mom and dad. Their finances are between them, however, from what ec has told us over time, there is a huge disconnect between the parents. Seriously Calmom, everybody has seen this happening and you are the only cheerleader. Personally, I think you are doing ec wrong with your rah rah. If you cared, you should have pushed him to have a financial safety instate.</p>
<p>I am going to go out on a limb here, but ec has already told us he has a car. His mom doesn’t work, so he is not responsible for his siblings. Why is he not working? He said he put in an application at Olive Garden. Well, I know where he lives, and there is a couple dozen places that he could work within a few miles. I’m sorry if I am sounding harsh, but he could have earned that 300 dollars himself. ec? What happened to the job you were applying to, and why if you have a car weren’t you working since you were 16? Please don’t give the reason of swim team or drama. All of our kids did the same and still managed to have a job.</p>
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Yeah, because Knox college at $8000 a year is such a horrible fate. </p>
<p>He HAS an affordable college now – it is Knox. Knox costs LESS than than he would pay for room and board at the in-state options he had (like Flagler). Knox is a much, much better college. I am delighted that EC will be able to attend Knox, and it is quite clear that his parents are going to pay for his first year. That’s all he has to worry about at the moment. </p>
<p>I am glad that my faith in EC’s ability to get into a good, affordable college has proven correct.</p>
<p>I am sorry to see adults continuing in their efforts to defeat and undermine a kid who has worked hard and is being rewarded for his hard work.</p>
<p>Calmom, obviously you have missed a few points, such as ec is in Georgia, and not in Florida where Flagler is. He is 40 miles from UGA, and although his stats wouldn’t get him in there, there are several other instate options within his driving area. </p>
<p>I am a low income single mother, so don’t tell me that the $8,000 is going to be the entire cost of him as a student, as a freshman. How about getting the student to the college, setting up the dorm room, making sure they have spending money, laundry money etc. How bout splitting a pizza every other week? Seriously, students need to know there are many more little extras that will add up. </p>
<p>If a student or his family is struggling to meet the EFC, where does the little extras come in?</p>
<p>I HOPE ec’s family can handle this, but when we have been told there isn’t money for food till the next check comes in, that worries me for ec.</p>
<p>Again, ec has a car, why isn’t he working? Most schools ask for a student contribution around $3,000 for freshman year.</p>
<p>His father can meet the EFC. The family isn’t poor - the problem is that the income flow is sporadic. The father could afford to drive him all over the place to visit colleges, paying for gas for the trip and I assume staying in motels along the way. </p>
<p>I never gave my kids extra money for college – I paid the bill for he bursar and the kids paid for incidentals from their earnings. Knox has given EC work study so he has a campus job waiting for him.</p>
<p>Again, there obviously is no problem with the money for the deposit. The money is due May 1. EC’s dad said he would pay, and the mom said that she’ll pick up the cost if the dad’s money doesn’t come through. The issue of mom vs. dad’s credit car is an issue of household finances resolved between the parents-- it doesn’t concern us and doesn’t really concern EC. I mean-- that’s just one of those marital issues that probably is based on a lot more going on than this one bill.</p>
<p>I just don’t understand why you are so mean spirited. EC applied to the state U. in Georgia and was rejected. The colleges he is looking at are clearly better suited to his interests and better fits than the 2nd-tier in state colleges he could get into. I mean, I know that CC is obsessed with the Ivy League, but Knox is really an excellent college. It also is a great fit for EC’s interests and he can get a terrific education there.</p>
<p>And sometimes fairies fly.</p>
<p>You’re the one who has constructed an elaborate fantasy whereby the father who earns $80K+ annually somehow can’t manage to pay a $300 deposit. </p>
<p>The kid has been accepted to almost all of the colleges he has applied to. He has bee prevented with more affordable options to choose from than my kids ever had. He has narrowed down his choice to two, agonized over the decision in a way that is not materially different than the kids who are trying to choose between an Ivy & Vandy with generous merit aid – and he has made his choice. </p>
<p>I can’t fathom why you find that fact so irksome, but that’s the way it is. </p>
<p>Given that the father is self-employed, next year there will inevitably be stress and worry over the financial aid award. Not fun, but its what I did for 6 years with my kids and it pretty much worked out in the end. EC may have more flexibility because he is attending a college that does give merit aid, and if he does well there may be extra sources of funding or scholarships available to continuing students. That’s what happened with my son – in his junior year he applied for and received scholarships that paid the full cost of attendance his senior year. In any case, if EC runs into problems I’m sure the Knox financial aid department will work with him.</p>
<p>Interesting discussion. </p>
<p>Calmom, with all due respect, there seems to be a lot of projection in your posts. GA2012mom is trying to bring up real concerns with real issues and real suggestions. Yet you seem to want to degrade them by ascribing derogatory adjectives and adverbs. She doesn’t sound “irked”, nor is she creating a fantasy or driving a wedge between family members. And if your distortions convince EC that posts such as GA2012mom’s, which bring up real concerns about real matters or make real suggestions about how to earn some spending money, are wrong or should be ignored, then the one creating the fantasy or doing the disservice to E-C is YOU. </p>
<p>You are welcome to take him under your wing and bat off any feedback or recommendation that you deem unhelpful, but in doing so, don’t crush him. Unless the many many posts are gross exaggerations, money seems to be a source of great costernation for the E-C family. It would be lovely if $80+K/year for a family of 6 was a lot of money, but it isn’t. It would be lovely if E-C’s parents had a cooperative working relationship with their funds, but it doesnt sound like that is the case either. It would be wonderful if E-C had a savings account of his own whereby he could take care of some of these issues himself and not let it stress him out as it does. What happened to the money from the returned defective refurbed laptop E-C got for xmas? Is that money available to pay the deposit? Then again, if he had to take an IOU from dad to repay him, given what he has said his mother has experienced, its possible that IOU may not be repaid forthrightly. Am curious, if mom isn’t working, where is her cashflow coming from? Is she having to tap into savings or retirement money? Or does her extended family help out? </p>
<p>Hope E-C’s dad’s IRS refund will be direct deposited into his account, and isn’t possibly one of the ones stolen by these 2 criminals on that side of town [Tax</a> refund checks stolen | News | Lawrenceville News](<a href=“http://lawrenceville.11alive.com/news/news/111699-tax-refund-checks-stolen]Tax”>http://lawrenceville.11alive.com/news/news/111699-tax-refund-checks-stolen)</p>
<p>There are some strange family dynamics at work. I live in metro Atlanta and while Montessori preschool is expensive, there are other less expensive options, especially for half days. </p>
<p>I really want EC to have the experience he desperately wants. I am worried that in the end, at some point, his parents won’t be able to come through. You are right, Calmom, perhaps Knox’s FA office will be understanding. </p>
<p>The dad has bad credit and the mom doesn’t seem to willing to help. Who will sign for additional loans.</p>
<p>I think Knox is the safest of his choices because his package didn’t include the Pell which means two things. If his family’s finances improve, he won’t lose it and if they get worse, perhaps he may earn it and add it to his package.</p>
<p>I really worry about the extras, including plane tickets home. I do think EC is in denial about what those things cost. His main focus now needs to be earning spending money.</p>
<p>Mom seems to be the realist and pragmatic in the family. It is not just the money but academic rigor as well. I would like to point out some areas that had not received much attention but should be taken under consideration as it gives a better perspective on where the 2 parents are coming from:</p>
<p>“Here are my moms reasons, “…I don’t have to maintain any GPA average to keep my scholarship. Not as much pressure. I only have to take three classes at once. Staying on campus, keeps me focus on academics.” …My dad went to three colleges and never graduated, he went more to party. My mom is very much like me, and she always had to study a lot to do well. She went to community college first and then transferred to USF because it had a very good education program.”</p>
<p>Given all these and the money, I think Knox is the best choice.</p>
<p>I honestly shouldn’t have said all of my personal family matters. The whole trust issue isn’t the only reason, but my mom just doesn’t want to put it on her card. She doesn’t even want me going away. If it was up to her, I’d be staying instate. And she also wanted me to think more about my decision and not rush into it, so that was also part of the reason.</p>
<p>They’re only two colleges I could really commute to. One is a community college and the other is a crappy 4 year college where you need a 2.0 to get in. I would be miserable at either school. There is no instate options that would have fit me. Even GCSU wouldn’t have been that great of a fit. Valdosta costs 13k even before financial aid and after having the Hope Scholarship.</p>
<p>Sometimes my mom does have to take out money from the savings, but my dad should be getting a lot of money next month. My family always has money for food. We are not poor. I have never had an empty stomach. I know the whole deposit thing is a red flag, but my dad can afford Knox. End of story. Wheaton was icky concerning money, but Knox isn’t. He is paying the whole 8k with one payment. He’ll have money for other expenses as well. The only thing that worries me is when my mom goes back to work because our financial aid will likely decrease by a fair amount. I do have about 2k in my savings, but why would I take out the money to pay the deposit? Either way it will be payed before May 1st. There really isn’t a rush even though I wish I could just deposit and get it over with. </p>
<p>Money wise, I’ll be getting a work study job on campus, which will earn me almost $2,500 for the year. That should pay for my living expenses and spending money. I am not in denial about plane tickets. My dad has a free round-trip ticket from Delta from earning all those award points. In September, my parents will be driving me to college and will help me settle in my dorm. Knox 's winter break includes Thanksgiving, so that’s just one big trip. The plane tickets would cover winter and spring break at least. Also, even though it’s not ideal, Chicago usually has some good fares. I would just have to take the amtrak. </p>
<p>I didn’t get my license until I was 17. I could have never had a job with drama. I’m sorry if you think this is an excuse, but only one girl had a job in my last play because of how time constraining it is. She missed mostly every rehearsal and did a crappy job acting. I haven’t looked for a job now because I’ll be gone for the whole month of June. I’m going to be working in college (re: work study), so I really don’t see the point in trying so hard to get a job when I will have money. I know kids who have to get a job to help pay their families bills. My family is no where near that situation.</p>
<p>BTW, my dad did spend 2k just for the spring break college road trip. That isn’t exactly cheap.</p>
<p>I didn’t say that your writing “sucks.” I said that although it is expressive, it is riddled with grammatical errors. The kind of errors that concern me most are those that may reflect ingrained habits and/or ignorance of correct English. “Costed” instead of “cost” is an example of this. Using “contain” when you meant to say “pertain” shows sloppy thinking, but it is less of an issue, because it is more easily corrected by an editing pass. </p>
<p>I have no idea what your SAT scores were, but I think that you should consider whether the apparent disconnect between your scores and your grades might be a reflection of the expectations of your teachers. Do you write better than most of your classmates? I have no doubt. On the other hand, I <em>am</em> familiar with the writing of HS students who write really well, and using “costed” instead of “cost” is the kind of thing they would never do, not even in a first draft, because they have been surrounded since birth by educated people who speak and write standard English well. Little children make that kind of error, and are corrected by adults. (I recall a professor of Greek in college illustrating some point with an anecdote about her very young daughter making precisely this kind of mistake.)</p>
<p>I don’t want to tear you down, I want you to succeed, and enjoy college. That is why I advise you to take full advantage of whatever writing support is available to you from the start. </p>
<p>Stop and think about it. The most elite schools in the country have freshman writing programs in which ALL students are required to participate. These are students with 750+ on the CR and W portions of the SAT, and 5s on multiple AP exams. The writing standards in college are higher, from the mechanics to higher level skills such as organization.</p>
<p>And finally, your writing IS pertinent to the subject at hand because it has bearing on whether you would find it difficult to maintain a 3.0 at Wheaton.</p>
<p>I will reiterate that you need to try to break the habit of being close-minded and casting blame in all directions. It is often the case that people’s strengths lie very close to their flaws: passion and determination can become selfishness and thoughtlessness. (Stop harassing your mother about the deposit. Have you thought about the burdens she is carrying and what your begging and pleading is doing to her?) You have a lot of potential. I don’t think that anyone is doing you a favor here by enabling you.</p>
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The family dynamics is that the family is NOT poor. They are middle class. Because the income comes in spurts rather than a steady flow, they juggle. That does end up hurting their credit, but it doesn’t make them poor. </p>
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How is that different than any other family who relies on financial aid? </p>
<p>Are you saying that I should have sent my daughter to community college because there was no way I could be certain of being able to pay for 4 years at Barnard when she started? </p>
<p>People who rely on need-based aid generally are taking things one year at a time. If they are sophisticated about money and the aid system, they know that the aid is redetermined each year, and they can never assume that their costs for the first year will be the same throughout. </p>
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That’s not true. The mom didn’t want to run a charge on her credit card in mid-April for an expense that is not due until May 1st. If it had been me, I would have made the same call. </p>
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Actually, it’s amazing, but there are cheaper ways to travel than air. College students have been known to share rides, for example. </p>
<p>Or then again, maybe the parents who can afford to pay $6000 to send their toddler to Motessori will turn out to be able to pay for a plane ticket here and there. </p>
<p>==
EC has shared information about his parent’s finances as part in the course of explaining pros and cons of Wheaton vs. Knox. But he never asked or invited people to question his father’s determination of what the family could afford, or to pass judgment on the choices the family makes or the way they manage their money. I am appalled and offended by the the way people on this thread are doing exactly that. If EC were older and financially independent, I can see where some parents might think it helpful to give him advice – but he isn’t. He’s a kid, he has a kid’s-eye-view of the family finances. His parents aren’t here to present their parental view, or outline how they plan to meet his needs, etc.</p>
<p>But the kid has a pretty solid middle class lifestyle. He lives in an ample home, he was able to travel to France last summer, he has his own car, etc. So it looks to me like his family is able to sustain their current standard of living. If they can afford to pay $6000 annually for the Montessori school, it’s a pretty good bet that they will be able to pay the cost of a plane ticket.</p>