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<p>You can ditto this advice from me as well, E_C. I cannot agree more, and I wish you the best too!</p>
<p>I was planning on responding once I picked a school, but that won’t happen “officially” for another week or so. So, might as well respond… And part of the reason I didn’t respond was because of how cruel and rude some users were (no name dropping). I have researched colleges since 8th grade, so it makes me mentally sick being told that I’ll hate either college. I would also like to note that certain CC members have told me in the past that I should just go to a community college because of my SAT scores. SAT scores do not define who I am and never will. </p>
<p>I ended up talking with my counselor for over 30 minutes Tuesday. This is a very good counselor who I’ve known since freshman year, not the crappy one. At first, she thought I was leaning towards Knox, but we basically ended the conversation that Wheaton was the one. She didn’t think 14.5k in cost was a big difference. She thought if it was 50k it would have been. She also told me not to worry about the GPA requirement because of my academic record. I called Wheaton Tuesday and you do not automatically lose your scholarship if you get below a 3.0. They work with you. The admission counselor said, “It’s a big difference if you get a 2.8/2.9 than a 2.0.” I also leaned that I didn’t have to go to the June orientation and could just go to the August one. I asked to be put in contact with a Wheaton student, but thus far, I haven’t heard from anyone.</p>
<p>I really did agree with amtc’s post #101 though. I thought I was convincing myself Knox was the one because of money. But after talking to jkiwmom & calmom via PM, I really think Knox is the better academic fit. I do think I would be more comfortable living at Wheaton, but I’m not picking which is the better location. I am picking the best school for me. </p>
<p>Now here comes the problem. My dad didn’t have the money for the deposit, that’s why he refused. He is waiting for 6k from the IRS. Here is the thing with my dad. There are some months when he gets no money and other months when he gets a lot. He will be getting 20k just next month and in addition he may be getting another 20k as well. This is what happens when you have a commission based job. My dad plans to pay the full tuition & room and board in full with one payment. My little sister goes to a Montessori school which costs 3k per year. She only goes twice a week, but next year she is only allowed to attend if she goes full time. It’s actually funny because it’s still only until 12PM, but every week day. It will cost 6k per year. My dad wasn’t planning on sending her there, but my mom was. So, my dad cannot afford Wheaton AND Montessori. I really do think it’s unfair that they’ll spend 6k on a two year old when Knox only costs 8k per year. Even with the money problem, I still think Knox is the best academic fit. But I cannot deposit until my dad gets that check from the IRS, which may be another week. My mom refuses to put it on her credit card and yes I have begged and begged, but she won’t budge. She thinks I am making an irrational decision and thinks I need more time as well. She even told me it isn’t a stressful decision! I have had trouble just focusing in school because of this. It has put a mental drain on my spirits. </p>
<p>I really do think my dad could make Wheaton work financially because he loves it so much, but Jym asked if I can only spend one year at one college, where would it be? Honestly, I wouldn’t want to go to either college if I can only go for a year. It wouldn’t be worth the debt when I can go instate for much cheaper and with less loans. My biggest worry with Wheaton is that I’ll go there for a year and then have to transfer due to finances. At Knox, I wouldn’t have the financial stress. It’s just the safer bet in my eyes. I have no problem going to Knox. I really like the school, but the rural location is the only setback in my eyes. But I am going there for an education, not to live there permanently. </p>
<p>I have a deviated septum. I cannot breathe through my nose. I had surgery when I was 15 and it didn’t work. I also have a bad allergy to dust. At Knox, it felt very uncomfortable in their library. My dad who isn’t even allergic to dust noticed this. Would I die if I studied there? No, but I don’t think I could concentrate. Am I going to rule Knox out because of a dusty library? NO! And yes my home is very allergy free. I think I may have to ask for allergy-reducing housing placement. And at the other colleges, their library’s were much more modern and had zero dust. I will say Knox’s library is very beautiful though.</p>
<p>The whole “hot girl” thing went way out of proportion. My dad was just telling me that Wheaton had more attracting girls, which is true. Most 17/18 year old guys would like a school because of this, but c’mon lets be serious. There will be hot and ugly girls wherever you go. I would never pick a college because of this. </p>
<p>I will say Know did put their Fall 2012 class schedule up and they’re offering a course entitled, “The Holocaust in Film and Theatre.” Sounds like the perfect class for me :)</p>
<p>I would also like to thank all the newbies for their advice! Especially TWINMAMA! :D</p>
<p>EC, did you see all those student profiles ( I think there are about 75 ) videos called “I am Knox”. That seemed a pretty great way to learn about the college. I think everyone on CC wants it to work out for you and the " tough love" is just to help you. Whatever you finally do, it is your time to step up and Take Responsibility for your life. Be excited about your choice and make it work. You get to go to a whole new place and started over. Get ready by working hard this summer for the money you will need. Go to your public library and get some books about making the most out of college. Take responsibility and make the next 4 years count!</p>
<p>EC, I’m sorry if you found my posts cruel, but even without knowing about the refund from the IRS, the nursery school costs, etc. my takeaway from many of your posts has been that although your parents are hardworking and are trying their best not to disappoint you, the additional cost of Wheaton might be make or break for the family.</p>
<p>I would be very disappointed in my schools guidance department if any professional ever suggested that money should not be a factor in a college decision. I would like to introduce your counselor to the dozen or so kids in my town who are now working at Kinko’s, Bed Bath, or at the GAP when the cost of their private college proved to be the straw that broke the camel’s back for their families. I know their parents are mortified… but if the choice is between the mortgage and tuition, guess what, kid comes home and works for a year until the family gets back on their feet. The recession has been tough on two income earning families-- even those with regular paychecks- I can’t imagine the stress on your dad with commission based income.</p>
<p>EC, you are a smart and sensitive kid. Take 5 minutes and imagine life from your dad’s perspective. Mortgage, taxes, health insurance, presumably life insurance, utilities, car insurance, food. </p>
<p>I don’t blame him for encouraging you to aim high- that’s what parents are for. But to me, you’re getting all sorts of messages that suggest that Wheaton is out of the budget.</p>
<p>I also don’t believe that your choices are Wheaton- preferred but expensive school, vs. Knox- too rural and cheaper school. You’ve got other acceptances-- which perhaps you can look at with a fresh eye if in fact Wheaton is unaffordable (not just now, when the deposit is due, but for FOUR MORE YEARS) which may seem more tenable when compared with the rural/remote/dusty but affordable Knox.</p>
<p>Sorry this decision is stressful for you. I think your parents don’t want to disappoint you which is very admirable, but I can’t imagine that summer of 2013 when your Wheaton Sophomore year first semester tuition is due, is going to be any less cash-strained than Spring of 2012 is. And likely to include a 5% increase. And then again in 2014 and so on. Your dad’s “temporary” cash flow problem while waiting for the IRS, a commission check, etc. is likely to repeat itself for the next four years.</p>
<p>Hugs to you. This can’t be fun, but I can pretty much promise you that if you put as much energy and passion into college as you have into the college search/research process, you are going to love wherever you end up!</p>
<p>EC,With all the financial uncertainty you’ve described, cost should be a big factor in any decision you make. Most kids, unless they come from wealthy families, have to take cost into consideration when choosing a school. That’s why many kids end up at community college or their instate publics unless they can find great merit aid or need based aid elsewhere. Get busy with finding a summer job to help pay for all of this if you haven’t done so already. Good luck in making your final decision. As we’re saying, we truly do want this to work out for you.</p>
<p>No one stated that you would “hate either college.” I believe you were referring to my statement that I wouldn’t be surprised to find you were “unhappy” at either school.</p>
<p>I realize that that statement was rather harsh, but I was attempting to point out that it appears that you have a tendency to look for the negatives. You will always be able to find problems if you look for them. And the fact that you are unhappy with your current school, as well as the state you currently live in. These are just observations, but it gives a bit of insight into your personality.</p>
<p>I suggest that you take a fresh look at all the schools that are still on the table (where you were both accepted and can afford.) List the positives about each, including everything from student vibe to campus facilities to academic opportunities. Realize that each school will have likely have a number of negative aspects as well. You can choose to list them if you feel they are important enough.</p>
<p>And, keep in mind that you are choosing the place where you will receive your college education. So, academics should be more important than, say, an attractive campus. In fact, maybe a list of important criteria can be made. Then next to each criterion, give each school a grade. Add them up and maybe you will have your answer.</p>
<p>I think that posts 124 through 127 are all very helpful. </p>
<p>In post 127, I really like the way that familyof3boys explained one way for you to just review the schools still on the table in order to make your final selection. </p>
<p>FWIW, one of my sons was having a hard time deciding between 2 schools. I asked him to write the name of the 2 schools at the top of a paper and then list pros, and then cons. About 20-30 minutes later he made his final decision.</p>
<p>It does concern me that your dad does not even have the funds to make a deposit and that your mom won’t put it on a credit card. That’s one of the risks with your financial situation of going so far away to college. I would try to get it straight with them how they are also going to pay for your travel costs, whether you end up in Illinois or Massachussetts. You don’t want to be stuck in a situation where you’re repeatedly trying to come up with the funds to purchase airplane or train tickets and your parents are saying the funds aren’t there. Adjusting to college is stressful enough without having repeated money stresses being thrown into the mix.</p>
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I think the point is that Knox is preferable to the only other two acceptances which are clearly affordable, which I believe are Clark & Earlham. By preferable I just mean that EC likes Knox better. So it is NOT a question of EC merely deciding between Knox vs. Wheaton, it is that those two schools are the last two choices remaining after EC has already been through the process of looking exhaustively at all of the other options. </p>
<p>In any case, I’m pretty sure that the decision has been made in favor of Knox. At least Knox is the place where EC has been trying so hard to make a deposit. EC probably doesn’t need more pressure from parents one way or another. I think he’ll have the deposit when he needs it. I think the problem he is facing now is that his parents are in the habit of holding off on incurring expenses until they are actually due, and the deposit is due May 1st. It’s hard to convince someone who is tight with money to run a credit card on April 20th for something that can be deferred another 10 days.</p>
<p>I do think that if EC sends an email to Knox and lets them know he is definitely coming, they are going to hold that spot even if the deposit comes a day or so late.</p>
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<p>Say what? Is your counselor paying the difference in cost? $14.5K is a very large difference…over $1000 a MONTH in college costs. I find it interesting that the college counselor would make the comment that it’s not “a big difference”…personally, I think that $1000 a MONTH is a huge difference.</p>
<p>One thing to note…re: the dust. It was a very early spring…in the midwest (where Knox is located) it is very likely that there were more pollen issue at Knox…than at Wheaton simply because the pollen has not yet deposited itself on “things” here in New England.</p>
<p>Very good point about the pollen. I hadn’t though of that, but I noticed today just how pollen-y my dashboard is.</p>
<p>Ironically,as an aside, I just read this on another thread-- a very impressive former graduate of Wheaton <a href=“http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/12/health/research/mary-ellen-avery-premature-babies-savior-dies-at-84.html[/url]”>http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/12/health/research/mary-ellen-avery-premature-babies-savior-dies-at-84.html</a></p>
<p>No one here is trying to be cold-hearted or harsh. Those speaking both to and for e-c are truly trying to be helpful. And direct. Cashflow problems, especially for families without a stable (meaning regular, twice a month type) paycheck are real. And they can make people anxious. And for people already prone to stress or anxiety, its even worse. So one should look at how to best minimize stress and anxiety, and in this case, sounds like the decision to go to Knox may be the best way to do that. This “pay at the very last minute” approach for the deposit has to be awful, especially for someone who would benefit from getting closure and excited about the chosen school.</p>
<p>EC said he was going to visit his grandmother for part of this summer. He should look into offering to run errands, wash cars, teach some basic computer skills, etc. to her friends and neighbors, for a reasonable hourly rate. Put up a sign. Do something to have some spending money. If EC has the $300 in a savings account he can make his own deposit to Knox and not let the way his parents choose to manage their finances stress him out like it seems to. </p>
<p>FWIW, my s’s have worked since they were in HS. One built up his own, very successful computer installation, clean-up and repair business from the ground up. The other worked in fast food and retail, during the school years in HS and in the summers. And they went to school far from home so they had to commute long distances to get to their jobs after school. They then worked as camp counselors in the summer, before their upperclassmen college summer internships. They also did a lot of volunteer work, starting at age 12, for which they each, in separate years, received a big local community service award and also another big volunteer award. My point in mentioning this is to say that there are ways of making these things work. So when several of us suggest that earning some spending money is important, it is doable. Really. And the invaluable comfort of knowing one has some spending money is extremely important, and provides a feeling of pride and self reliance. </p>
<p>So, to repeat what others have said. No parent here is rooting for failure. Everyone wants the same goal. For EC to relax, succeed, be happy and focus on the positives. Maybe not every poster says it in the way it is wanted to be heard, but it is all the same message.</p>
<p>I can’t contribute to this conversation (other than to comment that Wheaton is better known on the East Coast and Knox is not). But I just had say that I’ve been following early_college for years now, starting back when he really was considering going to college early. We’ve watched you grow up!</p>
<p>I’m finding this whole story reads like a TV drama and has more suspense than whether Rory Gilmore was going to pick Harvard, Yale or Princeton. I can’t wait to learn what happens, and – please, early-college, continue to update us when you start school in the fall. Many of us long-time posters will want to know how you are doing. I also hope you pay it forward by coming back on CC and share your knowledge with younger students posting here.</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
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<p>jym, very good ideas to earn some cash.</p>
<p>Other ideas for earning spending money, (that my s’s have also done in various iterations):</p>
<p>Odd jobs for neighbors (e.g. my s painted a fence for a neighbor, raked leaves, etc), babysitting, staying with an elderly person for several hours so their family member can go aout and attend to personal matters, tutoring, etc. Lots and lots of opportunities are out there.</p>
<p>I am pretty sure I’ll be attending Knox! I have been researching all of their course offerings for next year for the last couple hours. It just doesn’t seem official without the deposit. I really hate waiting another week, but my mom will put it on her credit card if my dad doesn’t get the IRS money in time. They aren’t really in a hurry unfortunately.</p>
<p>I have seen some of the Knox student profiles before. Knox has such a wide variety of students. They do have their share of jocks, but so does every other small college. </p>
<p>I am honestly not that sensitive. I am actually pretty hard core, but here is the thing. I’ve been on CC since Feb 2009. When I’ve talked about harsh and rude CCers that really contains to my last thread (SAT Optional one). But telling someone that their writing sucks, is an insult and has nothing to do with my dilemma. If you’re really going to judge my writing based on my postings then that’s just dumb. I don’t even have time to edit them most of the time. I got all high A’s last year on my essay’s and had the second highest grade in my honors language arts class. If you think my writing sucks then you do not know what the average high schooler writes like. I do have time to improve and my writing isn’t perfect, but no senior’s writing is perfect. It just aggravates me how a lot of elitist individuals think I cannot succeed due to my SAT scores. I really think I have showed them wrong. I got accepted to 13 out of 16 colleges with only one rejection. I will also like to note that the majority of the people I know who are going to GCSU didn’t take one AP class. I received over $330,000 in scholarships for 4 years from all the colleges. I am actually really interested in becoming an admission counselor at a college one day. I really love researching colleges and it has become a hobby. I cannot wait to help my younger brother who will most likely stay in Georgia or go to Florida. BTW, I started senior year with a GPA of a 3.389 and will likely end with a 3.5! </p>
<p>I was never talking about specific CCers, but just in general. So don’t take it personal because the majority of the people who have responded did nothing wrong. </p>
<p>I do look at the negatives, but that’s the point. You’re suppose to have a pro and con list. I am very picky, and I have VERY high standards. I really need to lower my standards, but that’s just me. My dad has said that I’ll never be happy because of this. His whole pitch was that I’ll hate both colleges, so might as well go to Wheaton because at least I have Providence and Boston to escape to. I really cannot escape Galesburg without a car. But telling someone that they wouldn’t be surprised if they were unhappy is just aggravating when I’ve been researching for several years. I have no hard feelings towards familyof3boys, but my dad is a key proponent to that, so just saying…</p>
<p>I despise Georgia for several reasons. I will start by saying that I like the weather here and it’s very beautiful. I also like the diversity in my school. But people are very un-open-minded. Southerners can be very pushy with their religion. I have felt like a lot of people shove religion down your throat. In my school, kids will make fun of people who are different from them. A lot of people think here that white people should be Republicans and black people should be Democrats. I only know one Jew in my whole school, but I do know quite a bit of Muslims. It’s just way too conservative! I have nothing against Florida and I had a fine childhood there. I actually really love South Florida, but probably would never live there again. I actually miss all the bagel shops and pizzeria’s. When we first moved here, people didn’t even know what a Sicilian pizza was. I’m in the suburbs, so it’s not the same as living in Atlanta. I’m also sick that everything is football first. Not many people care about the Fine Arts at my high school. My principal is trying to get rid of them. </p>
<p>The only other options I had were Earlham and Clark. OWU and Juniata ended up being more money then Wheaton. I hated Earlham, so I’d never go there. I really wish I would give Clark another chance, but I really think Knox is the one. Clark costed 10k per year, but would have saved 8k in loans. On the other hand, it’s 8k more money for my parents. I could get a free masters degree there, but honestly when I was at Clark, I kept on thinking about Knox. That wasn’t just subsequential. I agree 100% with calmom.</p>
<p>My grandmother really lives in a not so populated area of Florida, so not many neighbors, etc. I plan on looking for a job when I come back, so I can work in July and August. I have done a lot of volunteer work. I volunteered at a Broadway Camp in Buckhead when I was just in middle school. I was a junior camp counselor and even taught Ludacris’s daughter, Karma. I volunteered at a Family Entertainment Center’s Haunted House during October. I was an actor in the house. All of the money earned went to Relay for Life. I also often helped teachers after school hours during past years. I also babysit my two year old sister for free. So, even though I’ve never had a “real” job, I’ have some experience.</p>
<p>We actually had a lot of pollen in Georgia a couple weeks ago. It was disgusting and terrible! But I’m not allergic to pollen thank God!</p>
<p>Fireandtrain: I’m glad you’ve enjoyed my own series similar to Gilmore Girls haha.</p>
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I know it is frustrating, but if your mom is carrying a balance on her card that may mean that she is paying high consumer interest on every dollar she spends, so from her perspective, it’s not such a good idea to charge anything earlier than the time it is absolutely due. Alternatively, if she pays the card off in full each month, she may have a concern about when the billing cycle ends - it’'s very possible that if she waits until a later in the month before making a charge, she won’t have to pay it back until June.</p>
<p>In any case, it’s your parents’ call. It’s their money and you can run the charge on April 30 and you will be fine. I really think that you should email Knox and let them know you are coming – you’ll feel better, you’ll know your spot is being "held’, and one way or another, the deposit will be made by May 1.</p>
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<p>I hope you stick around CC to give advice to kids (and parents of kids) with weak SAT’s and GPA’s in that range, so they know that they have real choices. I know that all of your college acceptances and merit awards are no accident - you worked hard at school and you worked hard to research colleges. You challenged yourself with a lot of AP’s your senior year and you have a rising trend - colleges absolutely love to see that. You have an intellectual passion in studying the holocaust, and have sought out opportunities beyond what your school offers – colleges love to see that. You have long term participation and interest in an art (theater) – and you participated in school athletics as well (swimming). So you are a kid with a demonstrated passion, talent in the arts, and “well-rounded” to boot. I know that you have impressed some of your high school teachers with your natural inquisitiveness, and had glowing LOR’s to complement your college essays.</p>
<p>So I think you could give a lot of great advice and encouragement to CC’ers who come on board and led to believe that it all centers around their SAT score. The point is, hard work pays off, and a person who has realistic goals can achieve them.</p>
<p>ec, congratulations on your acceptances. I think you are over thinking things, as $ is probably the #one thing you should be looking at now. You will do fine at the school that you choose, and you need to choose the school that your family can afford. No more need to disect course offerings or greek life. Seriously, you will do fine where you land. Find an affordable school!</p>
<p>ec, is there a reason your mom can’t put the deposit on her cc and then when your dad’s income check comes in he can pay her cc bill?</p>