<p>it must be 3:35 where you are sexydesi... are u an insomniac</p>
<p>oops semp, i tot u posted the rice n bush one.....my bad
i meant astrix.......:p</p>
<p>that is the case....i got work to do..but im not doing it....mannnn!</p>
<p>neither am I !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, talk about senior year, lol, I am starting to feel the combined effects of senioritis and major burnout... I hope to stave it off with a fun trip to europe with a bunch of my buddies this summer</p>
<p>hehe....i am sittin in my office and supposed to be researching on "detonation", but instead am surfin ard CC..<em>sigh, itz addictive</em></p>
<p>omg im going to europe too..with my sissy...to a couple of places in europe...plus senioritis has fully kicked in....i only went to school 10 times this whole marking period..and its been like 30 days or something..</p>
<p>Man I can't wait till this summer. This has gotta be the worst year for me in hs.</p>
<p>au contraire sarorah, this is the BEST year for me in hs, </p>
<p>I have tested my mettle last year by becoming ap national scholar and this year I am free to pursue the classes that I want... I am taking 2 ap's(as compared with last year's 11) and the rest are classes at my local cc, </p>
<p>besides, it is Senior year, time to have FUN</p>
<p>tomorrow I'm taking someone out to a private screening of the film "Grilled" , I think I'm gonna be part of a focus group, has anyone heard about this...</p>
<p>A couple had two little boys, ages eight and ten, who were excessively mischievous. </p>
<p>The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be confident that if any mischief occurred in their town, their two young sons were involved in some capacity. The parents were at their wit's end as to what to do about their sons' behavior. </p>
<p>The parents had heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children in the past, so they contacted him, and he agreed to give it his best shot. He asked to see the boys individually, so the eight-year-old was sent to meet with him first. The clergyman sat the boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?" </p>
<p>The boy made no response, so the clergyman repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God?" </p>
<p>Again the boy made no attempt to answer, so the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face, "WHERE IS GOD?" </p>
<p>At that, the boy bolted from the room, ran directly home, and slammed himself in his closet. His older brother followed him into the closet and said, "What happened?" </p>
<p>The younger brother replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time. God is missing and they think we did it!"</p>
<p>ha ha ha, that feels like something bush would do</p>
<p>LOL!!!!!!!!!......neha oh crap..i thought it was gonna be a dirty joke like the clergy men pointed down...but thats like ummm funnnnnnnyyyyyyyyy</p>
<p>no dirty jokes.....or rather not have......... unless thye are really funny....:D</p>
<p>Yeah senior year is SUPPOSED to be good. I'm still in my sophomore year. :(</p>
<p>A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids... "WOW," the social worker exclaims, "Are they ALL YOURS???" "Yep they are all mine," the flustered mumma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, "Sit down Leroy. All the children rush to find seats. </p>
<p>"Well," says the social worker, then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names."</p>
<p>"This one's my oldest - he is Leroy." "OK, and who's this one?" Well, this one he is Leroy, also." The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the oldest four, all boys, all named Leroy. Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Leighroy!</p>
<p>"All right..." says the caseworker, "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL named Leroy?" Their Momma replied, "Well, yes - it makes it easier. When it is time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I just yell 'Leroy!' An' when it's time for dinner, I just yell 'Leroy!' an' they all come a runnin.' An 'if I need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just yell 'Leroy' and all of them stop. It's the smartest idea I ever had, namin' them all Leroy."</p>
<p>The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, "But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?" "Ah, that's so easy," said the momma. "Then I calls them by their last names."</p>
<p>I love this one. I always tell it over and over to new people :p</p>
<p>hahahahahahahahahah :D</p>
<p>One day, Mr. Caterpillar decided to hitch a ride to town. As he was standing by the roadside, a family of bees came by in a little car and offered him a ride</p>
<p>Gratefully, he accepted. After putting along merrily for a few kilometers, the engine sputtered and the car rolled to a halt. Without saying a word, Papa Bee alighted and urinated into the fuel intake. When he turned the starter, the engine started up, much to Mr Caterpillar's amazement!</p>
<p>However, he did not say a word. The car went on for quite some distance before the engine died again. This time, it was Mother Bee who urinated into the fuel intake, and again, the car started up after that. The process was then repeated again for Baby Bee.</p>
<p>By the time the engine died for the fourth time, the little car was only a few kilometers from town. Not wanting to appear unsophisticated, Mr Caterpillar got out of the car without a word, and started opening the fuel cap.</p>
<p>In a flash, Papa Bee got out of the car. "What are you doing?" asked Papa Bee.</p>
<p>"I'm going to **** in the fuel intake, just like you did", said Mr Caterpillar.</p>
<p>"Oh, no", said Papa Bee patiently, "that won't do. This car only runs on Bee Pee (BP)."
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<p>hehe very nice :)</p>
<p>My history teacher actually told us this one lol:</p>
<p>Why couldn't G Unit get on the city bus?</p>
<p>Cuz they didn't have 50 Cent!</p>
<p>PWAHAHAHAHA!!!</p>
<p>No? Darn.</p>
<p>I love this thread! :) Especially those Bush jokes!</p>
<p>Expect corniness:
1. Q: What did eight say to infinity?
A: Straighten up.
2. Q: (This is one of my friends fav jokes; hope she doesn't get mad at me for sharing this one) Why is six afraid of seven?
A: b/c seven ate nine.</p>
<p>Honest Resume:
<a href="http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/resume.php%5B/url%5D">http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/resume.php</a> (site version is better b/c it requires the different font sizes)</p>
<p>Object: To earn a full time and high paying job (on the grounds that this resume was accepted into automated job finder program without the aid of a human reader.)
Education: At the University of Toronto('s bus stop realised) I earned (just enough allowance from my mother to add up enough bus change.) PhD, MA, BA and BSc (are nonsensical words that I mumbled while shivering) in (the bitter cold while I waited for what seemed like) 6 years.
Since childhood I studied the works of famous Doctors (like Dr. Suess, Dr. Who and Dr. Dre.) I am currently observing the sequel of another doctor's successful first practice, (Dr. Dolittle part 2.)
In high school I was the class valedictorian('s friend.) As well as the president of the student body('s punching bag ).<br>
I was the teacher's pet(roleum supplier once while she stopped for gas where I was working as a Gas Station Attendant as some sort of slave detention program she came up with.)
(I am clearly) straight (and) A student
Skills: Can type on average 100 words per minute (in chat rooms since the letters L and O are so close together lol lol. )
I am a people person (in the literal sense. )
I am dependable (on my parents.)
I work well. With others(, not so well.)
Experienced with (downloading) software such as Windows, Excel, Word, Lotus Notes, Photoshop and Windows Notepad.
A notable and documented record of (being intoxicated in ) public. Speaking of which I am well-known and famous for (among close circles of college friends and disappointed family members. )</p>
<p>This is an actual question which a Physics teacher asked my friend-</p>
<p>A man is standing on the roof of a 200 metre building.At 5.00 pm,he cuts off his hand and throws it down the building.What time will the watch (attached to the cut hand) show as soon as it touches the ground?</p>