We are applying to Tabor as well. It is one of our top choices - that changes weekly. Good luck to both of us!
Vacalover, the other boards have nothing to do with this topic. It was by way of illustrating that message boards are not necessarily operated this way.
@VACAlover we applied to some of those schools as well a couple of years ago. I found that by creating a specific thread with the name of the school in the title (for example: Questions about Tabor Marine Sciences Program) generated answers from people who may not post all the time, but have experience with that particular school. Good luck and I hope that you have some choices to make on 3/10!
Twinsmama: you know next to nothing about me, who and what I know and what my experience is. Sue22: all vaid comments though most dont apply to me. I dont care about asked and answered questions. On a separate note: just because people post about where they or their children or families have or have not gone to school doesnt mean that all of us disclose everything. I observe that there is a core group here that jumps all over others if we don’t post in just the right way or defer to your self described experience or knowledge.
Let’s keep it civil.
agreed Bigsis8723.
@LaxPrep , Great observation. I have a couple of thoughts about the “why”. But, before I hypothesise, I would like to thank @Sue22 & @gardenstategal & @MAandMEmom & @GoatMama & @RedSoxFan18 & @twinsmama for their sensitivity and generosity towards the young posters. The chance for a potential applicant or accepted student to learn more about a school which the College Confidential forum(s) provide is invaluable. I can still remember a few years ago when a young student poster provided 10 observations (aka tips) to a new student about his school. They were truly invaluable to me and my child. CC can be so useful!
Now, why aren’t there more posters? I have a few thoughts… 1) At my child’s BS, her College Counselor almost forbade her to look at (let alone post on) College Confidential. The counselor thought the information was too harsh and would discourage the students. My child took this advice to heart with almost a religious fervor.
Secondly, even if this were not true, I will speculate based on a silly example from yesterday. I was in an exercise class, and my instructor got off his bike and did this absolutely adorable dance. One of the other class participants joined him and someone commented that the video of their dance should be posted on an application that is composed of brief videos. The person could not remember the app names so I yelled Snap Chat–thinking as a self respecting mother–I knew about the cool apps that kids used! I was totally wrong. He was referring to an app named music.ly . So, my point, long windedly, is that maybe there is some newer forum that kids are looking to for information. I have seen this same phenomenon in the way my child consumes college information. She has found other internet sources that she prefers (this was even before the college counselor advice).
And lastly, besides their possible fear responses from CC, and the possibility of kids moving to the next new source of BS information, is the reality that lots of OTHER marevelous distractions exist. My kid is fond of Pinterest and Instagram and Facebook. Others like Twitter, etc. So, maybe they are just gravitating to apps or sites that give them more dopamine.
I personally feel a responsibility to support vulnerable and naive and scared kids about BS questions if I can help. These kids are facing decisions that may change their lives and I want to give them the encouragement where I can.
So, thanks again for posing the question, @LaxPrep! 
SculptorKid keeps telling that I should cut back on social media and do something productive such as reading books, as she does.
Plus, sites and fora like CC wax and wane in popularity, and it is quite possible we are witnessing a point of lower interest among the sorts of folks who are boarding school-curious and have the time to waste on the interwebs.
From all the info I have, applications are up every year. In the applicant/parent cohort of which I have personal experience, interest in elite boarding schools is exacerbated by the particular factor of proximity to a well-known school combined with elite-level success in the classroom and/or in athletics. These families are not multi-generational BS legacies, but being upper-middle class families with high-achieving kids near enough to a world-famous school that it acts as a high-gravity exemplar and/or status symbol, the boarding school world becomes a desirous aspiration for some.
None/few of those folks are here. As. Far. As. We. Know…
We found a lot of support on this board. Our situation was very particular: two kids applying for 9th and 10th - one from a JBS and another from a competitive day school. The warmth that we found seems to have vanished. I am not exactly sure why, but the tone on the boards is now somewhat vicious. We definitely benefited from the help we received. I hope current applicants and their families are greeted with many options come 10 March. Good luck and let’s remember - cut people slack. We are all trying to learn and some of us are in a position to share and when doing so we should do it as kindly as possible.
I haven’t been on this section of the forum much lately…and I fear that I might be among those being referred to as not that hospitable to newbs. I know that occasionally my dislike of the “HADES or bust” mentality definitely comes through loud and clear. I don’t know if I need or want to apologize for that, though. IMO, too many people restrict themselves to the brand name schools as if others (which might be amazing experiences) are “beneath” them.
Frankly, I also tired of people asking the same questions year after year. Which has something to do with why I don’t contribute much anymore…I know, noone is forcing me to read these posts or reply to them. So I don’t.
Finally, I did/do/and will think many applicants (or their parents) have an unrealistic view of their own/their kid’s standing in the applicant pool. I’ve noted this before, but SevenDaughter1 was a 2380+ SSAT applicant and eventual National Merit Finalist and she didn’t get into every BS she applied to. It’s tough out there.
Best of luck to all this year’s applicants.
I have my share of disagreement with @Center but I think the reason why this forum is not as active as we’d hope is complex. The harshness of some comments is only a small part of it. What we should be cautious about is to not inadvertently suppress unpopular views and drive people who hold those views away. We should avoid being harsh and otherwise unnecessarily discouraging to posters especially kids NO MATTER what they are asking including when they come in the process with the “HADES or bust” mentality. With all due respect, kids with stats lower than @sevendad get in top schools all the time. What’s important is to remind posters to evaluate their needs for “hedging” so if it’s necessary make sure they have at least one school on M10. Also, it’s helpful to provide links to earlier threads on the subject asked again but it’s not to just ask posters to go search around and not bother to ask. My 2c.
As a relative newbie, I have found most the comments to be very helpful to us as we navigate the BS process. I appreciate those who have gone through the process offering their thoughts on schools, the process or other aspects of the process. While there may be a board-bias toward certain schools, personally, I think people can apply to whatever schools or batch of schools matches their children’s academic, social and other interests (and family values). It does not bother me one way or the other …I have been bothered (and noticed) that when students post, there have been less than kind responses, which I assuming are coming from parents, who are posters. I would hope that we can all be respectful to these younger posters and either ignore a post, if you don’t have anything positive to add, or use a respectful tone (how you would want someone to respond to your child) in responding. Good luck to everyone on March 10!
Regarding BS choices: Some kids and parents, especially those outside of NE and those without BS pedigree, simply don’t know enough about the BS world. If they apply primarily to HADES schools it may not be because of some type of “mentality” or “attitude,” but because of limited information. Such information deficit is a serious disadvantage and it takes awhile to overcome. The process of fact gathering and piecing together a picture of the BS reality is tedious and time-consuming. My child is seriously invested in the BS idea, but has zero time left in the day to do that kind of research. In the past 9 months, I’ve put my career on hold to score over websites, discussion boards, and brochures to help her out. That’s how I know that there are more schools out there than just Exeter and Andover (something I wasn’t aware of in the beginning).
I’d also like to point out that often the information deficit is just a byproduct of social disadvantage. With all the talk about meritocracy and geographic and socioeconomic diversity, it find it snobbish to pass quick judgments about people’s limited BS choices. We don’t know what their circumstances or challenges are. Are less-informed kids and kids of less-informed parents less intelligent, capable, or deserving to attend BS? Well, I’m not sure I even want to hear some people’s answer to that question.
Anyhow, all I’m saying is that I’d rather assume less about people and their motivations and just answer their question (if I can). Often, they’ll self-correct once they’ve gathered all the facts. There is no need to beat them over the head with it.
I have lived near Boston for more than 20 years, went to an Ivy League for college, and had heard of many famous NE prep schools, but until this fall when my daughter decided she wanted to go to boarding school, I had never heard of 5 of the 7 schools where she ended up applying, all of which are within 90 min of our home and are incredible places. The 2 I had heard of were because I attended a wedding and a summer party for work at those schools. So I do not fault people for not knowing about hidden gems, or even some of the better known schools. Like GoatMama, I have spent lots of time doing online research and am learning so much from people who have entered the boarding school world!
Well stated @GoatMama. I totally agree. I’m not sure why some posters have self-appointed to crush the dreams of any new kid asking for information about schools that excite them. I think the condescending attitude towards those who ask questions combined with over moderation have essentially killed what was once a very active and useful exchange of ideas and support. I find it baffling that newbies are supposed to use the search feature (which is cumbersome and ineffective at best) to find exactly the information someone said about a school 7 years ago. Schools change. School culture changes. New posters bring new ideas. Many times a newbie may not even know every question he/she should ask and would get ideas from a lively exchange, but those are no longer permitted. New posters may bring a wealth of information but since they aren’t allowed to ask any question previously asked and also not allowed to post on an old thread, how would they engage in an exchange that may benefit others or themselves?
The low proportion of people who actually post relative to those who view comments is disappointing - this is such a specific forum that more people must have something to share, even if only kind words. The warnings not to reveal too much on the chance that schools look at this site (no idea if that happens) have discouraged me from posting about visits to different schools, but I wish that there was more of that and will do a few write ups after decisions are in. My child is doesn’t know anyone who is or has applied to BS. It would be nice if she could connect with a supportive community but I don’t think this is an ideal place for a young 8th grader.
Best wishes to all the applicants and families.
Count me as another who used to post more often but grew tired of the overall change in tone this fall as well as some snide remarks thrown my way. I post in free time occasionally because I can provide some answers from my limited perspective from inside the boarding world. I’ve seen unpleasant posters come and go. I imagine the tone will change as folks move on, and I’ll check in again next year.
I’ve always enjoyed your posts, @Albion, and I’ve found them very informative. When I first posted on this forum, not too long ago, I wanted feedback on a specific issue and received very thoughtful responses. Even those who challenged my assumptions or shared opinions different from mine (@ChoatieMom, @cupajo, @suzyQ7, and @panpacific come to mind) did so very respectfully and I greatly benefited from their insight. We don’t have to necessarily agree on everything. Being gracious is all it takes. Off of my soapbox now.
- Resurrecting old post - While I don't necessarily object the policy, I think it is embarrassing for a new visitor to have his first post closed with a warning, and discouraging for future participation. If the policy is necessary, would it be possible to implement it into the board's programming? Such as getting an automatic warning for replying an old thread, or simply removing the comment option when a thread was uncommented for certain amount of period.