Look at this thread!

<p>It seems to be hard to get the attention of people here on these forums, but can someone grade my essay?</p>

<p>This is from the first practice test in the BB.</p>

<p>Question: Is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority?</p>

<p>Throughout the dawn and history of mankind living in any form of civilization or community, the act of questioning the ideas and decisions of people in authority is what allows a society or a group to move in a positive direction. It is clearly evident that in the past and with current events, questioning authority leads to a much better society as a whole.</p>

<p>The importance of questioning authority most recently had a significantly positive impact on the lives of the inhabitants of Libya. Mohamar Ghadafi had been the ruler of Libya for an extended period of time, and the people of Libya wanted change. He lacked the characteristics and ideals that the Libyans wanted for a leader, and the idea of keeping him in a position of authority was questioned. The result of this was a new, improved Libya that has undergone a revolution to lead the country in a more positive direction.</p>

<p>The importance of granting the ability to question the decisions of people in power was a recognized and acknowledged by our founding fathers. They knew that in order for the country as a whole to improve and prosper, the decisions of people in authority had to be able to be questioned. That is why there are three branches, the judicial, executive, and legislative branch. These groups can question the ideas and decisions of eachother so that no one person has too much power, preventing a bad country from growing.</p>

<p>Ideas of those in authority are questioned in many different ways. Harriet Beecher Stowe did this in the form of literature. She wrote books such as Uncle Tom's Cabin that depicted the lives of African Americans in anti-slavery movements, and bred support from different figures and groups around the country. Her questioning of authority in the form of literature helped move the country in a more positive direction. </p>

<p>It is an indeed fact that the act of questioning authority is imperatively important for a society or group to grow in a positive direction. Modern day as well as past examples clearly highlight that we will continue to question authority so that societies and communities will evolve to become better than they are at their previous state.</p>

<p>It’s actually not hard to get the attention of people on these forums. It’s just that no one wants to grade essays. Think about it; would you? Especially with such a “humble” title as the one on yours.</p>

<p>Your essay is a standard, AcademicHacker template essay. By no means bad, but not glorifying either. Basically, I was reading the essay and it felt trite and (a bit extreme) boring, like I’ve seen it a thousand times before. Add some freshness in there. A quote, perhaps?</p>

<p>Examples are nice but elaborate more. “in a more positive direction” is repeated at the ends of examples 1 and 3. Think of something more creative plz. Also plz define what a “positive direction” is…what does it really mean? Also a bit on the short side.</p>

<p>9-10.</p>

<p>and I just realized you just copypasted this essay from another thread. just bump it then. btw a reason that no one is really replying to some of your other posts is that they’re common posts with answers that can be easily found via searching. i.e.
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/sat-preparation/763933-everyone-read-before-posting-best-sat-prep-forum-faqs.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/sat-preparation/763933-everyone-read-before-posting-best-sat-prep-forum-faqs.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>•Your essay is extremely wordy and repetitive overall, but it is especially noticeable in the introduction.
•Use more active voice.
•Use transitions. They are your friends.
•Your examples are good, but you have very limited explanations of exactly why it is important to question authority. What results from challenging power? </p>

<p>Kyrix brought up some very good points. Do not repost a thread but instead bump your original if you really need to. I will not provide a score because I don’t grade essays generally, so don’t feel as though I’m discriminating against you in any sense.</p>