They’re not completely safe but they are much safer in a time of action. I checked the stats a ways back and most of the anti-war and anti-military people would probably be surprised in a good way at how low the percentage of casualties in the AF/Navy are. Given that, some of the military jobs are inherently somewhat dangerous even in peacetime. However, people unfamiliar with the military also tend to not be aware that they have virtually every job that exists in civilian life - they’re not all on the front line with a gun or flying an airplane.</p>
<p>
Not to mention that there were no video games or even TV back in WWII when loads of people voluntarily joined up - young men much the same as those we’re talking about here.</p>
<p>OP:
As long as you have a high confidence level in your S’ ability to consider all aspects of joining the military, researches all the branches and job functions, gets any offers in writing, not verbal promises, and considers alternatives, then you might be able to rest easier for now although I realize that if he joins you’ll likely worry anyway. I’m not sure how effective crying or saying “don’t join” or negative comments about the military in general would be but making sure he researches facts and figures might be enough to convince him one way or the other. And - I don’t think anyone should join just for monetary aspects - they should want to join for other reasons as well - i.e. serving their country.</p>
<p>Toledo, my parents experienced a similar situation with my younger sister. She wasn’t happy in high school even though she got fairly good grades. My parents weren’t happy when she said she wanted to go into the Air Force after graduation. We are from a military family and it wasn’t an anti-war issue. They simply felt she was too young to make that decision. They told her they wouldn’t sign the consent form and she would have to spend a semester at the local cc since she turned 18 in Nov. Well, that semester she decided that she would stay in school. She never talked about the military again.</p>
<p>OTOH, my brother did the opposite. He finished his degree and then joined the Air Force. After 6 years, he left and started a fulfilling career with the federal govt.</p>
<p>A practical route would be to guide him to Civil Air Patrol or Sea Cadets. </p>
<p>These groups consist of cadets under 21 and adult members. Many of the adult members are former military or reservists. My son loves his unit, but he has lost 95% interest in joining the military. We have extended family in the military, but no one who is immediate. My son has seen the reality of the military, effects on the family unit and the lack of financial success as compared to the civilian world in many job classes thanks to the honesty of the adult members. My son has incredible respect for the military, but he has come to the conclusion it is not something for him at the age of 17 or 18, but he has not ruled out joining after college. His unit has a memorial for all members who have died in service. It can be sobering. </p>
<p>I would be proud for my son to serve, but also scared. I am glad that it is something my son has given considerable thought to. I do not think anyone should volunteer without considerable thought.</p>
<p>My recollection is that recruiters were very agressive before the economy got really bad and that they now don’t have to offer a lot of perks to meet their numbers. I didn’t know that they still aggressively recruit high-school students - I would think that many would go there given the economy.</p>
<p>I read an article about NCLB and the mandatory reporting requirements today. It’s scary that teachers and others can put all sorts of things in the file that parents don’t have access to which may or may not be a problem for college, work, certain professions. I don’t like that certain sets of people can get access to that information and that there is no chance to see or even correct errors in such records.</p>
<p>I’d stay away from the Army. I’m retired Navy, but worked with all services throughout my career. The Army treats their people the worst of all the services. The Air Force treats people the best, but has a lot more politics than the other services. Don’t think that being in the Navy and Air Force will get you out of deployments. Most of my friends have had several deployments with the Army because the Army didn’t have enough people to fill all of their billets. It’s better now though since Iraq is mostly over. </p>
<p>Recruiters are salespeople, anything that they promise you should be in writing in your contract. Read it very carefully before you sign it. If they’re promising you enlistment bonuses it should be in writing in your contract. The military is a great way to pay for college and get job training, but be sure that you know what you’re signing up for.</p>
<p>S1 would have done it even if he had not gotten the NROTC scholarship. Money was not a factor in his decision. He was determined that it was his life’s vocation. It was his dream.<br>
S1’s Navy job is a dangerous one but his is a very small specialized community. Those who serve on ships/carriers/subs are generally not in harm’s way. </p>
<p>OP: Don’t put the cart before the horse. This may be something he is just “thinking out loud” about. Just because he’s talking about it doesn’t mean he’s totally committed. Next week he could be on to something else. If he does continue to talk about it, then it would be in your best interest to calmly discuss the options with him and get involved with the information gathering. If he knows you’re totally against it and won’t even hear his point of view, then he could potentially go off and make a decision on his own (if he’s 18) that you might not like and then it’s too late.</p>
<p>I would encourage your son to consider serving his country by going to college and then pursuing the military if he still desires to do so, or working toward the Foreign Service or working for the government. There are many ways to serve our country without carrying a gun and putting your life on the line. If recruiters are doing such a wonderful job, for such a noble reason, why do they have to prey on young, impressionable people who don’t even have a fully developed reasoning center in the brain yet? If it’s so noble, go recruit college graduates to become officers instead. They are preying on uninformed youth who are swayed by the uniforms and the idea of importance and excitement - their tactics would be considered illegal if they were trying to get kids to sign up for credit cards, etc.!</p>
<p>OP – no one in your family has gone to the military, no one is a strong proponent of the war, you expect him to go to college and you’re angry.</p>
<p>Could be a bit of a teenage rebellion. </p>
<p>I’ve been there myself, although I was admittedly influenced by some ECs. Just keep in mind your son might be perfectly happy that you don’t approve.</p>
<p>Your son is an adult or is probably going to almost be one. He’s going to be at an age where he’s no longer legally bound to you. I think in this case you don’t have any right in criticizing his behavior. I think you should respect his wishes and try to steer him into the right direction by giving him facts.</p>
<p>I noticed in the OP you say that you’re opposed to the war. Even if this is a political/moral issue, then there’s probably a lot more that your son will disagree with you on. That’s no reason to get mad.</p>
<p>what is “the war” that you are against exactly?</p>
<p>Military Officers are very well respected and in very high demand when they leave the service. Yes, sometimes you have to deploy, but you are compensated for that and officers are generally (generally!) not in the thick of the fighting beyond the O-1/O-2 level.</p>
<p>If he is college material, push him towards the officer ranks. Encourage him not to enlist. Have a real conversation instead of just complaining about everything. That doesn’t accomplish anything.</p>
<p>I’m not sure about that. I know an older HS classmate’s sibling who would dispute that based on his experience as an 0-3 armor officer during Operation Desert Storm leading an armored unit against Iraqi tanks formations and reading about folks up to the 0-6 levels being in the thick of fighting in infantry units.</p>
<p>My perspective… we asked our son who had a very similar mindset to the OP to wait until after college to make a decision about military. He was Nat Merit so had choices of full ride vs elite admission - money was not the issue, no family history or support (THEN! for military.</p>
<p>Long story but zoom ahead to a five year undergrad and masters degree and the day before graduation he enlisted. Just like that.</p>
<p>He has been very lucky so far and loves what he is doing. Using part of his college education directly (language)and has had some great noncombat experiences far from comabt. But I don’t think that you can count on staying out of the fighting just because of rank or education.</p>
<p>Looking back I do not think that anything we said or did really made a difference except he went in with a degree (and I guess he feels that there are clear perks from that.) </p>
<p>Best advice we were given at the time was to meet the recruiter with him. And don’t take over - be prepared to listen well and discuss after.</p>
<p>OP - thank you for raising such a smart, unselfish, strong and dedicated son. We are all so grateful for his willingness to sacrifice four years of his youth, the comforts we take for granted and the better pay he could make in the civilian world - all so that we can live a life of freedom. In time, you will grow to be very proud of him.</p>
<p>A recruiter essentially “stalked” me at 17, and my mom pretty much signed me up. Money was a huge issue, but I had NO idea what I was getting into, until a few years later. Also didn’t understand that even with a scholarship, I believe I could have changed my mind. I Worried a lot that I could get snatched at any moment, but got to finish college, med school, and six years of residency ect, before I went active duty. First war since I was about thirteen started the very next day (okay, it was still an “operation” that day),</p>
<p>Turned out okay for me though, although I met a lot of furious reservists that had to leave their lives behind.</p>
<p>They called our home a lot trying to reach S about joining the military. I asked in all curiousity if he would have to pass a physical exam and whether there would be an issue because he has asthma and another significant chronic health condition that causes very limited stamina. The recruiters said neither asthma nor the other health condition should be an issue, but that does not correlate with what I have heard & read about the physical requirements of enlisting.</p>
<p>In any case, none of our family believe either of our kids nor us could physically qualify to enlist, unfortunately. It has not been an issue in this household, though I do admire friends and relatives whose children and loved ones are serving in the military. If our kids were healthier, it might have been a discussion to have. S does have a very good friend he met in college who is an officer & got a great scholarship to serve after he got his degree at expensive private U.</p>
<p>But schools are also required to send out notices at the beginning of the year informing families of this and giving them the opportunity to opt-out and not have their names released.</p>
<p>I came from a long line of no military service relatives, yet, I wanted to join and went AF ROTC on scholarship. I never regretted it. My parents came around eventually. I didn’t stay in and make it a career, but I enjoyed my time. It’s their life, not yours. Comments such as “You’re better than that,” and “I thought we raised you better than that,” strengthened my resolve. A recruiter really didn’t have anything to do with it as I made up my own mind before talking with them.</p>
<p>None of my boys are following in my footsteps, but that’s ok with me. I’m enjoying watching them pursue their paths.</p>
<p>Here’s my advice: Check out all options. If DS is a senior he still has time to apply for an Army ROTC scholarship (not sure about other branches). This application has no strings attached. If he receives a scholarship he can accept and no strings attached. He can attend his first year of college and if he doesn’t feel like it’s the path for him, he can give up scholarship and not be committed to anything. Athletes join the military all the time. Doing ROTC and athletics is nothing new. They adjust schedules for athletes so they can participate in both.</p>
<p>If he joins the reserves/National Guard then it’s a different story. He will immediately be a member of guard/reserves and have to train and eventually attend basic training. This generally requires taking one semester off to do so. He will be paid for drill time and have college benefits. As long as he keeps his grades up, he will stay in college and not be deployable. If he drops out of college or doesn’t keep his grades up he can be deployable.</p>
<p>You need to get informed about the military life. People join the military because they want to serve their country. Not everyone feels this way (obviously) but you should be glad many do otherwise your son would be headed off to mandatory military service like many other countries in the world.</p>
<p>The military can be a great career field. My DH served 26 years after attending college on an ROTC scholarship. He knew he wanted to serve and did so honorably. Yes he was deployed. Yes it was a good life. Yes it was a hard life. I’m sure people in other careers can say the same thing. He has completed two master’s degrees that the military funded, one of them a full-time program where he went to school full-time. </p>
<p>My DS is currently a freshman at an Ivy school. He is attending on an Army scholarship. This was his choice and we did not push him to this decision. I actually quizzed him constantly about choices and decisions to make sure he was making the right one for him. We would have paid for college (and because of my husband’s career and follow on career we would not qualify for any FA) but this is his choice. He has wanted to be in the military for years.</p>
<p>Again, do some research. Talk to a recruiter. Talk to the ROTC department at school DS wishes to attend (or one close to where you live). Do not make decisions based on emotions, make them based on facts. The military isn’t for everyone, but for those that do you should be proud and respectful and thankful to them.</p>
<p>sure, but most of the Iraqi tanks were taken out by US tanks before they were in range of retaliation, or by US air power. We only lost 9 Abrams tanks, 7 by friendly fire including 2 on purpose… 1 fatality.</p>
<p>generally you don’t command from the tip of the spear (some pilots are the O-5/O-6 level, but they are not playing the normal officer role).</p>
<p>I don’t see how an O-6 infantry officer can be effective from the front lines since he (or she) has to command thousands of troops, which you cannot do if you are hiding behind a rock being shot at.</p>
<p>There are also way more support jobs (obviously some of these are deployed support jobs) vs. front line fighting jobs.</p>
<p>It is ultimately his choice. I recommend doing a lot of research before making any commitments. What does your son want to do? Joining the military can lead to a lot of career fields and experiences. Being an active duty pilot is a lot different from joining the National Guard and working on a WMD response team, or managing contracts at a major installation. The military has everything from security guards to translators to historians to rocket scientists. If he wants to join, make sure he knows what kind of job he wants to do, its benefits, and its disadvantages.</p>
<p>(Being an officer has a lot of pay and benefits advantages over enlisting, but the work is different. Make sure he researches that too!)</p>
<p>Soccerguy, a lot of officers who lead combat units will do some sort of field work with the units they lead. This happens for a few reasons. First, they want a first-hand view of how things are going within their command. Second, people tend to perform better when they know they have capable leadership who will do what they ask their subordinates to do. Third, some officers have a background in field work, and like to retain a little bit of that.</p>
for military.</p>