<p>On another note entirely -- the issue of inclusion vs. segregation of gifted students.</p>
<p>I was a moderately accellerated student who was tracked all the way through elementary school and high school. I was always the youngest & smallest in my class. Even with being accellerated I was usually bored, and I am grateful for the opportunities that I had to pursue advanced level work or study, particularly for those that were extended to me outside of regular school hours which I remember fondly to this day, and which were a chance for me to meet and work with bright students from other schools in our community. (My town had some sort of Saturday program for gifted or high achieving students at around 6th-8th graded level, as well as special summer school with course taught at a higher level).</p>
<p>However, the one thing I knew as a parent is that I would do everything I could to try to keep my kids on track with their own age group in high school. Socially I was miserable in school, and while as a child I believe that my grade-advancement was a good thing and I attributed my problem to "mean" kids .... as an adult in hindsight I can see where my own social skills were sorely lacking, and I also understand that there was a developmental lag that was not solved or bridged by higher intellect. Especially as a parent I can see that there are some changes that simply happen at around a certain age, so that no matter how brilliant an 11 year old may be, he or she just doesn't have the same social sophistication as a 13 year old. (That sophistication may be negative in many respects -- 13 year olds can be very cruel -- but the point is, it is very real).</p>
<p>In other words, I was lonely and miserable most of the time. I didn't want my kids to be bored, but I would rather they be bored than to endure the social isolation and pain that I went through. </p>
<p>I tried to make sure that my kids would not have to be bored in school, but I looked for ways to anticipate and prevent the boredom without necessarily including academic accelleration. For example, I chose a school that had a hands-on approach to learning and an emphasis on projects and field trips - the kids were always going somewhere interesting or had some sort of project to focus on.</p>
<p>What I have seen is that my two kids simply did much better in terms of peer relationships, and this became especially apparent in high school when their confidence really showed through and leadership qualities started to emerge. </p>
<p>I honestly have no opinion on what other parents should do. For one thing, there are kids who are outgoing and resilient enough that they probably can manage quite well socially with much older kids -- my gregarious daughter is probably one of them. Nevertheless, when given the choice as to whether to skip a grade at age 7, my daughter gave the matter a great deal of thought and decided against it, choosing to stay with her own age mates -- even though she was often frustrated by the inability to really converse with her age peers. But she felt socially intimidated in classroom filled with older, larger kids -- so she was willing to bear with the intellectual limitations of her age-peers and socialize at their level, having fun with activities such as bike riding or roller skating that aren't tied to academic ability. When she wanted a real conversation, she looked for an adult, or talked to her older brother. </p>
<p>But the point is: I can understand why it is that it is the smart-but-not-brilliant IQ range that tends to emerge as leaders or successful business people in our society. Those social skills, and the ability to relate to people functioning on different levels, are really what come into play in most occupations -- successful people are those who can communicate easily at many levels and have strong team-building skills. </p>
<p>So one way or another, I think that parents should recognize the importance of social skills and development, and help to nurture them as well, in whatever way is appropriate to the needs of the child. They don't have to be gained in the classroom -- for example, a kid can be accellerated or attend a special school for gifted students, but still play on a local soccer league with kids his own age from his own neighborhood, or participate in a girl scouts, or whatever the parent finds as a social outlet. It may be that for certain kids, the best environment is mixed-age groupings, where the kid is neither the oldest nor the youngest.</p>