<p>How many of you are feeling this way? Son got the Wesleyan Early Decision application in by the Nov 15 deadline. Now there is a month of WAITING. I try never to mention this to my son since I figure he doesn't need my nerves on top of his own (if he has any - he doesn't talk about it). But after the big push to get the application in, I even have bad dreams about this! I want so much for him to have what he wants...</p>
<p>My parents are definitely more nervous to find out about my ED decision than I am, which is annoying at times, but I understand why they feel that way.</p>
<p>While I can't sympathize directly, I definitely know what it feels like for the house atmosphere to be electric and a little nervous in the month between ED deadline and decision. Here are some things we did that will hopefully help you (and your son!) feel better about it.</p>
<p>-Talk about your worries with friends who are going through the same thing. Outwardly, my parents were cool as a cucumber; always ready to comfort my brother when he was especially anxious. Sometimes though, I saw my mother browsing on the Penn website when she thought nobody was looking and I KNOW they snuck a copy of the Course Booklet when we visited a second time in late November!</p>
<p>-Write your dreams down. Then you can laugh at how silly they are when your son gets in [somewhere]. After all, it's not so much about getting into Wesleyan as it is your son being unhappy. Know that you've done your job and in one year (one year!) he will probably be thrilled at wherever he is, first choice school or no.</p>
<p>-Write a letter to your son, dated the night before he gets his decision. Tell him you love him and how excited you are for him (hopefully he's the type who doesn't mind a little sap!) and all the experiences you've been imagining him having at college next year.</p>
<p>-Find a really encouraging statistic (ignore the bad ones) and memorize it. When my brother found out that over 40% of Penn legacy ED applicants get in, the house mantra became, "Well you've got a 1:2 shot, Brent." Regardless of the actual validity of that, it always made us feel just a little better hearing that. Also, it sounds impressive when you throw that into a casual conversation!</p>
<p>and lastly, the best therapy for me:</p>
<p>-Rant on CC! We're here with you through the process all the way!</p>
<p>cedronella, I distinctly remember those feelings two years ago when my D2 applied E.D. That month of waiting was torture. Even though I was very confident that she'd be accepted, all I could think about was picturing the gloom that was going to hang over the Christmas holidays if the answer was no. Thankfully, she got her good news via email on Dec. 13th which happened to be a Friday, ironically enough. :) My D who is applying this year did not apply Early so we won't have that issue.</p>
<p>"all I could think about was picturing the gloom that was going to hang over the Christmas holidays if the answer was no."</p>
<p>Even though the stress radiating from her concern about being rejected from her "first choice" permeated the household, the above was my biggest concern. I knew that my daughter would get over the bruised ego part and eventually be accepted at a school that suited her. My husband and I told her that many times.....it was almost a mantra...."Columbia is a great school but there are other great schools and you will get into one". That being said, she dragged her feet getting her RD applications done and on top of the disappointment of an early rejection or deferral she would have been working on applications during the holidays. Fortunately she was accepted in the early round.</p>
<p>If you think waiting a month for ED/EA results is bad, try waiting the 3 1/2 months for the RD results after getting an EA rejection. That's what we went through last year, and it was not fun.</p>
<p>Thank you all for your encouragement. I hate being obsessed like this. My son has been through some really rough times and now I obsessively yearn for him to get everything he wants, all the time! I know it's not realistic!</p>
<p>Coureur,</p>
<p>What your child (and family) went through is what I dreaded, not the ultimate outcome. I feel badly for all the students who go through it.</p>
<p>cedronella, I can really identify with what you are saying. My son had also gone through some very rough times, and everyone was CERTAIN that he was a sho-in for his first choice -- how could they not take him -- high stats, muscian, varisty athelte being recruited by several schools. But, guess what, he got deferred by his ED choice. I was devasted for him, but only in private. He had to get his RD apps in, and we (my wife and I) had to keep him pumped up about all the great choices that were now open too him. But, as you, I wanted him to have what he wanted to have.</p>
<p>Well, guess what -- a year later he is at college, not at the ED school, but a place that he LOVES. He could not be any happier than he is now, his grades are high, his E.C.'s at college will be very helpful for med. school apps, and his is having fun. My greatest hope for my twin-daughters is that they will be as happy with their choices as he is with the one he made.</p>
<p>So, my advise is keep an open mind and heart to the other opportunites that can arise if the ED decision is not the one you all are hoping for.</p>
<p>one of the greatest lessons we can teach our children ( if we haven't already) is that life happens and we deal with it.
Parents and friends die, we don't get the class/girlfriend/job we wanted and worked for, storms hit, elections are stolen :eek:
Resilency will serve him well throughout his life, even if he does get into his ED school.
I am sure we all remember the star football player/cheerleader from our own high school days. It seems not uncommon for that to have been the high point of their life, perhaps since they expected things to always work out for them?
I know Bill Gates wasn't BMOG at Lakeside, but I bet they flock around at school reunions!
Anyway I think my point was that he will have a school where he is admitted and where he does well, whether he goes to the ED school or not.
try and keep the emphais on now, on enjoying the last bits of high school rahter than stressing too much about next year.</p>
<p>EK--so glad that you posted. You wrote something similar and wonderful last year this time, when I was one of the moms feeling anxious, and it really helped me keep things in perspective. I don't think there is anything to take away the nerves--keeping busy, exercising, anything to keep the endorphins up and the mind distracted. I have heard many stories like concerneddad's--maybe that old saying about "Be careful what you wish for" is true!</p>
<p>my parents are trying to comfort me in case of ED rejection or deferall. its kind of annoying.</p>
<p>My parents are already telling everyone I got in ED...as if there wasn't enough pressure already.</p>
<p>I kept my mouth totally shut for the month, so it was GREAT to be able to spend time on CC rather than drive my husband and son crazy! Thank God for CC!</p>
<p>It was, of course, a tremendous relief when the December email from admissions began, "Congratulations...."</p>
<p>duplicate post</p>
<p>I don't think we've had time to be nervous. There's still so much to do....the interview, finalizing the RD school list, essays for RD schools, etc.</p>
<p>Son is superstitious. He has a new jersey from his ED school draped on his chair in his bedroom......and refuses to touch it. It just sits there as a constant reminder of the impending decision. </p>
<p>The good thing is that he really likes the other three schools on his list.....of course, nowhere near as much as he likes his ED school......but I think he'd be very happy elsewhere, as well.</p>
<p>Keeping busy is a good way to avoid the nervous jitters for the next 25 days.....though, I'm sure my recent decision to paint the living and dining room in colors instead of the current white has nothing to do with nerves and changes....nothing at all (smile). Off to Home Depot. :)</p>
<p>My parents are actually getting angry with me for working on RD apps, telling me it's a waste of time. It'd be nice if they just didn't say anything at all, because my way of relieving anxiety waiting to hear from my ED school is to work on the other apps. It's kind of comforting, knowing that if I don't get in ED, I can always have a new chance at these other, fantastic schools.</p>
<p>Rabo-</p>
<p>I think working on RD apps is a mature decision. Success in life is very dependent on your ability to deal with the curve balls thrown at you....hoping for the best and planning for the worst. Keep up the good work. Your parents are wrong.</p>
<p>lol, I think all you parents on here rock! GOod jobb :)</p>
<p>I'm going to get my Mom hooked on this lol...........</p>
<p>All of you EDers and EAers BEST OF LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p>
<p>let's all pray that we do get what we want!!
I sure hope I get in ED :)</p>
<p>The waiting is hard. In our case we think S will get in but worry about whether he'll get a merit offer which will make it possible. I so want it for him. And as it gets harder and harder to get in each year, we worry he won't make this year's cut.... I mostly lurk here although I post a bit, and I can't decide if it adds to the stress or relieves it. The Head of School commented at a recent event - her son went off last year to a prominent LAC - how it seems to take over your life for a few months. It does seem that way for me.</p>
<p>Some of you won't understand the following analogy, but I can only compare it to being pregnant - you go about your day, do whatever you do, but always in the background is this awareness.... I feel like the college stuff is always there, an undercurrent in my life. It seems that whenever I see other parents of HS seniors, all we talk about is college. All of which is why I wish it was April!</p>