My daughter's BS failed to administer her prescription...now what??

Prep School Admissions Prep School Parents
21

<p>OP, so your daughter called you after she’d already missed three doses of meds? Why did she miss four doses, then? I’m confused.</p>

<p>My HS son takes meds three times a day. There are serious consequences if he doesn’t take them, but his doctor has told us that it has to be HIS responsibility. I do fill his pill boxes once a week, since his meds are complicated and some pills have to be split. I cringe sometimes when I see the doses he’s missed.</p>

<p>This episode may be a good thing in the long run, if it makes your daughter realize she has to be responsible for herself. A ninth-grader is old enough to do that.</p>

22

<p>I think a parent who sends a child away to school has a right to expect the school has licensed medical professionals on staff, and available 24/7 while students are on campus. More than one, because medical emergencies can and do happen in the middle of the night. Some schools might have doctors on call nearby, for emergencies, or be very close to a hospital. This is a fundamental requirement for assuring a student’s safety on campus. That is the school’s responsibility. It is deeply troubling if temporary personnel are shooing away students who need medication. </p>

<p>Part of the value of attending a boarding school is it teaches students how to advocate for themselves and for others. On the other hand, your child is a minor, and you are the parent. This issue rises to the parent level. The school is likely lucky nothing worse happened.</p>

<p>So, as Axelrod stated, rock those boats.</p>

23

<p>Periwinkle, a big thank you! I appreciate your thoughtful response. We are on a learning curve here. </p>

<p>I am not looking for “someone to blame” - rather, just a realistic idea of the school’s responsibility.</p>

<p>Thanks again!</p>

24

<p>to cptofthehouse, thanks for your excellent input. I will follow up on your suggestions.</p>

25

<p>You’re welcome!</p>

<p>As I reread your description of the incident, it occurs to me that a big part of advocating for oneself is learning the best people to contact in an emergency. It does sound as if it was an unusual situation which caught the school by surprise.</p>

<p>Your daughter (and later, you, when it continued) should have enlisted her dorm parent and advisor to help. The dorm parent should know who would be able to access the medication. I’m certain the dorm parent has no wish to face medical emergencies brought on by a lack of routine, prescribed medication.</p>

26

<p>First order of business is for your daughter to learn to advocate for herself. That means if someone “shoos” her away, she needs to insist, or get her adviser, dorm parent or school administrator to intervene and make sure that is corrected. And she needs to learn to do it WITHOUT parent intervention. </p>

<p>It’s something we talked about in older threads - when are children ready for boarding school. And although I had a few bricks thrown at me, I said, when they’re ready to drive the process or are capable of learning how to do it.</p>

<p>Having said that - she’s a minor and you do have the right to be upset if the school requires the meds to be locked up rather than self administered.The school should have a fail-safe in place.</p>

27

<p>The OP was clearly reaching out for information and support. BSBound and Kidsparent should read their posts again and ask themselves if they were truly being helpful.</p>

28

<p>I certainly did not write this to be anything other than helpful. Support does not come only from telling people nice things, or things they want to hear. </p>

<p>My view, popular or not, is that a child who can not be responsible for ensuring medication as important as the OP states should not be in a place the OP describes. </p>

<p>In the past year there was a parent who was considering sending a daughter to BS who they had recently learned was bulimic, or had a serious eating disorder. The consenus, as i recall was that this child may not be best suited to BS with such a significant issue.</p>

<p>I am not sure I view this case, missed meds, much differently. The student is, at the least, partially responsible for her own medical care and health. The OP describes missed meds as having significant, i assume medical, consequences. This is a serious situation. If the school does not offer significant medical resources the parent should consider if this is a good place for a child with potentially significant medical needs. I do not think it is incumbent on the school to be responsible or provide this level of oversight. Some may, some may not, the parents and student are responsible for finding the facts before attending. My conclusion from the situation as outlined is that the school does not commit to this level of medical attention, thus it may not be the best place for this child.</p>

<p>My son does not have medical needs and is on no meds, and we did not look all that carefully at the medical resources at his school. If he had needs for this we might have looked at different schools or looked differently. </p>

<p>I also do not think a school must provide this service, as another poster has mentioned. If the school is in an area with medical services it seems unnecessary for much but a basic infirmary (like many of us can replicate at home) and a relationship with a medical facility or provider.</p>

29

<p>

</p>

<p>Attention Deficit Disorder medications (Ritalin, Concerta, Adderall and Focalin) are Schedule II controlled substances. Given the high potential for abuse, schools must control the dispensation of such drugs on campus. Students at all schools have been prescribed such medication. Any reputable school will take measures to control access to such drugs–I believe it is also required by state laws. </p>

<p>As all boarding schools have active sports programs, they must have staff on hand to deal with the inevitable sports injuries. When 300 to 1,000 students compete in team sports, injuries will happen. Doctors’ offices are closed on Saturday afternoons. When a concussion or a broken bone happens, a medical professional should be on hand.</p>

30

<p>Sheesh - some seriously judgey, ignorant and unhelpful posts.</p>

<p>To the OP - I had a similar situation a few weeks into the first trimester. I called the infirmary and spoke to the nurse. An email is supposed to go out to the student if they miss their morning meds but that didn’t happen for some reason with my D during a very busy week. She missed her morning meds several days as she was late for class and if she didn’t get there before the first class there was no way to get there during the day without being late for another class and she was afraid of a demerit.</p>

<p>I looped her advisor in and the infirmary is now committed to sending her an email if she hasn’t come by before first period.</p>

31

<p>I think people are being a bit harsh on @bsbound and @kidsparent since we’re all saying the same thing to some extent. There should be a call to the school from the parent who remains the primary guardian. However, a student who isn’t able to manage his or her own medication schedule given the health implications if a dose is missed is probably not a good fit for boarding school. The coaching and development of the child’s ability to “advocate” for herself needs to come from the parent. And the student is should learn to stand on her own two feet and use the parent ONLY after she’s exhausted campus resources to resolve the problem. This won’t be the first issue like this, and it won’t be the last. Students who constantly need parent intervention won’t fare well on campus when it comes to be chosen for positions of responsibility (i.e. EC’s) long term. And yes - there are lots of kids who are “forgetful” or just don’t want to take their meds. But the posters are correct, it really isn’t the infirmary’s responsibility to track those children down.</p>

<p>In this case - the mitigating factor is the student claims to have arrived on schedule and was sent away. In my mind that is a staff performance issue that is actionable and could put the school at legal risk. The school NEEDS to know what happened from the first occurrence.</p>

<p>Coaching from home, and intervening only when all other avenues are exhausted is the most prudent course of action. When all else fails, then the pit bull mom act is totally appropriate.</p>

32

<p>I’ll share my experiences though it might not apply to OP’s situation.
My daughter is a healthy kid but we deal with school health center from day one.
D got BCG vaccine before she came to state at 6 months old. BS school required TB skin test negative. D got positive result but chest x ray showed clean. Primary doctor said it is ok and no need a treatment at all but her school insisted she need to take 6 months medicine treatment.
The medicine she took is very bad for her body and caused a lot of side effects. School health center staff kept tracking the progress during treatment and always remind her (and parents) to get prescription every month. However, I don’t think staff really track down if she took every dose. It is a painful process that she felt dizziness and other side effects. She did complete the treatment that school asked for.</p>

<p>D used to have seasonal pine pollen allergy at home but not severe. She felt so uncomfortable/itchy at dorm room and after dinner. We thought that was side effects of TB treatment as school nurse gave her antihistamines pills. Well, that is not good for her, too as she felt sleepy, fallen asleep, missed early morning class. We took her to do skin test at first break. Wow, It showed she has allergies to dust mites, fresh fruit, birch, oak pollen, cat … too.</p>

<p>School did support and help us go through all issues. Dorm faculty ordered to clean up carpet later found a hardwood room for her. Advisory promised to take an eye on her daily base and informed her teacher if she missed classes. Health center doctor/nurse help her to get non-drowsing prescription.</p>

<p>I would thank my D is willing to share her daily life including health issue with us. She told us a few students and her friends seldom to tell health condition to their parent. I think that is parent need to find out why .</p>

33

<p>I think people are a bit harsh when they tell a concerned mom ( who is not only new to this forum, but new to BS ) that her daughter is ill-suited for Secondary School because of one infirmary debacle.</p>

<p>I’m sure the OP appreciated that- along with all the parenting advice that followed.</p>

34

<p>I totally disagree that only mature-beyond-their-years teenagers should go to BS and especially to 9th grade. At my D’s school, all medications have to be dispensed through the nurse. The kids are not even supposed to have ibuprofen in their dorm room. In a situation like that, similar to OP’s situation, I think the school is taking on responsibility for Rx compliance and definitely needs to have a fail-safe procedure. Please note I am not saying the school has FULL responsibility.</p>

<p>OP, this was a hard lesson. Yes, you should talk to someone at school, who exactly, depends on the school. If it were me I would want the dorm parents to know D’s medical needs and consequences of missed doses. I would brainstorm with them about how best to ensure compliance.</p>

<p>You might also want to get your child’s advisor in the loop, not that they would really be involved, but they are kind of the overseer for everything and might have good input or good suggestions about who to talk to.</p>

<p>I would definitely submit some sort of “official” complaint so the school is aware of the lapse. The fact that previously you had been notified of a missed dose certainly contributed to your mistaken assumption that school staff were acting in loco parentis regarding your child’s meds.</p>

<p>Of course you need to work with your daughter and it seems you already know that. I am sorry so many posters were so judgmental towards you. They must only know some kind of fantasy 14 year BS students.</p>

35

<p>Every industry, from airlines to hospitals to zoos, has systems in place to attmept to avoid preventable errors. Numerous lines of evidence have demonstrated that depending on one person alone is not sufficient. Boarding schools are no different.</p>

<p>Additionally grown adults have difficulty taking medication as directed. Up to 75% of adults do not adhere to medication instruction in one fashion or another.</p>

<p>Given the age that students start boarding and what is known about brain development (judgement and avoidance of risky behavior matures in the late teens and early twenties), I don’t think that is realistic to assume that any child is able to handle every potential “problem” that arises. That is why I would expect boarding schools to be particularly serious about medication management.</p>

36

<p>The very last sentence of my post should have read, 14 year old BS students.</p>

37

<p>As the mom of two BS students and the Emergency Contact for six BS nieces and nephews, I’ve had a lot of contact with school Health Centers. Always expect the unexpected.</p>

<p>I have one child and two nephews who take meds everyday. I can assure you that things can go wrong even when a HC is run by meticulous and caring people and you think you have everything covered. Two quick examples:</p>

<p>Onetime, a few years ago, my son had to leave campus before dawn to travel to a regatta and didn’t arrange for his meds to be given to his coach the night before. When I arrived at the venue, he told me he hadn’t taken his meds. I called the school to say I was on my way, but was told the nurse noticed when she got in and was already on her way to me. Lesson learned- I still keep track of sports and departure times.</p>

<p>Another thing that happened had to do with a nephew (who attends a very popular “Dream School”). His school nurse called me because his prescription had run out and needed to be filled immediately. Since his parents were out of the country and it was a controlled substance (and therefore couldn’t be faxed), I had to drop everything, get it written, filled and drive four hours in a snowstorm on a Friday night (I so badly want to use CAPS here), so it would be delivered by morning.</p>

<p>Needless to say, I had words with his mother when she got home and she learned a big lesson- before she leaves to go anywhere, she calls me to let me know the meds are taken care of. Thankfully, we can joke about it now, but for weeks there was ice between us.</p>

<p>(For all the moms and dads out there who travel- chose your Emergency Contacts wisely- especially if your child is taking medication).</p>

<p>These experiences are pretty mild, but illustrate how parents adjust and learn, too. For the OP, it was all new and I felt for her.</p>

<p>My only suggestion (in addition to other great suggestions on this thread) is to get to know the nursing staff- check in once or twice a term just to say hello and see how things are going. Most nurses love it when a mom or dad calls and are more than happy to provide an update. I usually call when they’re not busy- after lunch and before athletics.</p>

<p>Overtime, these relationships build and will provide you with an added layer of trust along with some peace of mind.</p>

<p>Best wishes to the OP and her daughter. After this gets worked out, I know your daughter (and you) will have a fantastic year!</p>

38

<p>to PhotographerMom and other recent posters: thank you all so much for the constructive suggestions and sharing your own stories.</p>

<p>Here’s what I’m taking away from this unfortunate experience:</p>

<p>When boarding school requires meds to be locked up and administered only by approved staff, I believe the school assumes a duty: to administer meds, and to notify someone if, for any reason, a scheduled dose is missed: student, parent, dorm parent, advisor…
Yes, my daughter could have handled it better, and I believe she has learned a valuable lesson.</p>

<p>But the primary responsibility must be with school/infirmary personnel, as they have ultimate control over prescription medication.</p>

<p>The mom whose daughter missed insulin this week told me this has happened before (they are in second year). </p>

<p>One last thing: the fill-in who told my d to come back later first told her that my daughter’s Rx was all gone (incorrect). It turns out my daughter did take issue with this, remembering that before Thanksgiving the bottle had pills remaining. (The infirmary as policy emails ten-day reminders to parents.) The fill-in stated she would look for the meds but instructed my daughter to go to class and return during lunch, but the infirmary was locked. It was then that my daughter let me know she couldn’t get her medication. And despite multiple emails and voicemails to the infirmary from me, no one responded. The following evening I got the Head of School involved.</p>

<p>For those who suggested that the school nurse “can’t chase down all the students every day, and beg them to take their medication” I would just point out that, of course, that would never be the case! But on any given day, I would imagine there are a handful of students who miss their meds for whatever reason. To me, the correct approach for this would be to, first, ensure the student receives prescribed medication and second, put in place a negative consequence for missing it. But the consequence shouldn’t be no meds.</p>

<p>These are health professionals, after all.</p>

39

<p>PhotographerMom, I hope you stick around the forum. It sounds as if you’ve had heaps of experience with schools!</p>

<p>I just wanted to add that technology is changing things. Very few of our doctors hand us a prescription anymore. They send the prescriptions directly to our pharmacy over the internet. Thus, they can send a prescription to a pharmacy near the school, which would allow an adult from the school to pick up the prescription, sparing you an 8-hour round trip. (An adult, because students would be in danger of disciplinary consequences if they carried their Ritalin prescription, say, from the pharmacy to the health center. Our pharmacies also require a signature to pick up a prescription. I don’t know if minors can sign for their own prescription.)</p>

<p>My children are local boarders, thus our doctors and schools are in the same state. I don’t know if it works across state lines yet. It’s part of the push for computerized medical records. There is also an online patient portal, which would allow (theoretically) parents out of the country to log on, request a new prescription from the doctor, and arrange for the prescription to be filled in Prep School Town, without involving you.</p>

40

<p>Really - it just sounds like the temporary staff needs a disciplinary hearing and it’s worthwhile to skip the chain and call the headmaster.</p>