<p>Concern father, welcome! You’ve received some good practical advice so I’ll just elaborate on a few general points:</p>
<p>First, slow down. Concentrate on the next few years, 10-13, which are key development years for any child. College will be there for later.For now think about what you can do to keep your son intellectually motivated but still involved in activities that are age appropriate.</p>
<p>Second, He will not need sports or community service on his resume to get into college. Should children be physically active for general health and well being? Absolutely! Should all human beings take an interest and contribute to their communities? Yes, I think so. </p>
<p>So, it’s a good idea to get him involved in a sport or physical activity of some sort. It’s a good idea to get involved in a “caring and sharing” group that interacts with the community – or the planet. </p>
<p>I particularly like Boy Scouts and it is an organization that offers a lot of opportunities for both physical activity and community interaction.</p>
<p>Third, educate yourself about the unique psychology of gifted children. They ARE different. They DO need special handling and understanding. Their brains are moving at light speed but their emotional development may be average or may even be stunted just because they are so different from their age group and from the rest of the population. Nurture that part of your kid too.</p>
<p>There are so many organizations, summer opportunities, clubs, newsletters that cater to profoundly gifted young people. Get on the mailing list. You’ll find you’re not alone in your concerns and challenges.</p>
<p>Chess clubs are a great outlet for many kids, especially the intellectual types. I would also encourage some type of sports, as much for the social development as for the exercise and sportsmanship. </p>
<p>It is better for most kids to go to college at the normal age. The social issues can be very problematic for the younger students. </p>
<p>Boy Scouts is a great activity for boys of all abilities!</p>
<p>You need to be aware of his development as a well-rounded young man, not just the intellectual powerhouse that he has promise of maturing into. I have watched a dear family member raise one of the exceedingly bright young men into a rather one-sided young man who is still extremely bright but didn’t develop into an adult can balance well some of the normal things in life such as family, anything outdoors, social situations and the like. </p>
<p>He is too young for you to be worrying about college. Keep providing intellectual challenges, but keep an eye on the type of person you are raising as well.</p>
<p>I know the kid who entered med school at 12. He was a year behind my husband in med school. I’m not entirely certain that article gives a true picture of his upbringing. From talking to him and meeting his mom a couple times briefly, I got the impression that they really worked to make sure he did have some normal interactions growing up with kids his own age. Obviously, as time went on, that accelerated somewhat - he matured rather quickly just by being in classes with older people. But his social development was definitely a concern in his family.</p>
<p>Children can’t “skip over” social development stages. They must pass through each of them to get to adult behavior. This is something many parents of prodigies don’t quite get. The end result is many prodigies have emotional difficulties later on, especially when under pressure. Prodigies often don’t know how to “relax” or spend time doing non-intellectual things. They need to learn to avoid later burnout. Prodigies also need to interact socially with children their own age, at least for awhile. This ensures the child learns all the appropriate social cues and the “give and take” nature of social interaction. Those lessons are an absolute necessity for a successful and happy life.</p>
<p>You may occasionally have to get silly with your child to encourage age-appropriate play. Jump on the bed with him. Bring him and other kids his age to play paintball. Let him be a Boy Scout or play basketball.</p>
<p>The thing about kids - ALL kids - is that they tend to be rather single-minded and passionate about their likes and dislikes. We’ve all seen it. My son was dinosaur-obsessed from ages 1 to 8. He knew absolutely everything there was to know. Eventually, he moved on and explored other things. Your son is doing the same with math and science, albeit at a higher level. Parents need to be the ones to expose children of all intellectual levels to other things.</p>
<p>I also noticed that in your categories, you listed nothing in the humanities. What about reading and history? If these are areas he is less familiar with, explore them together. Take day trips to historical places. Read appropriate books together and discuss them. Those parts are necessary for a good education, too, as well as simply being a well-rounded person.</p>
<p>This is where I suggest to take it easy. Maturity takes time. One does not need to be mature emotionally or socially to understand linear algebra, but one needs to be to understand War and Peace or Death of a Salesman. That’s why there are no prodigy historians or novelists.
I let my S choose what to read. Not surprisingly, he chose tons of math & science related books. He also read fantasy and science fiction. It did wonders for his reading comprehension and vocabulary. He read well above his age and grade levels. That was plenty.</p>
<p>ConcernFather - you’ve gotten a lot of great advice here from experienced parents. I think you’re wise to put off college for a while and allow our child to develop in other areas. I have also noticed that the kids who do enter college at very young ages do not go to the very top schools. If he does wait until he is a little older he will most likely be admitted to any of the top schools he chooses based on his academic abilities alone. So let him be ten and follow his heart.</p>
<p>You did nothing wrong, and there’s no need to undo anything. You are lucky to have the mentors at the university, and your school district is accommodating; just continue to follow the kid’s lead in choosing the appropriate education for him. He can take or audit classes at the university and/or do an independent study with his mentors; you may want to postpone the internship to his teen years, though. And of course there’s plenty of distance learning opportunities nowadays (already mentioned here in this thread). </p>
<p>Universities like HYPSM are not looking for balanced development in every applicant; in fact, they now say they do not need well-rounded applicants but they construct a well-rounded class. Anyway, even if they were, it’s too early to think about it: they don’t care about what the kid did before high school (ECs, sports, etc). Well, I personally don’t think a student of any age should do anything at all with the sole purpose to impress the universities. Let him do what he wants; that will be impressive enough.</p>
<p>The biographies of the kids in USA Physics Team are pretty amazing reading (I don’t know whether the other science olympiads participants publish theirs). I didn’t read those for [url=<a href=“http://www.aapt.org/olympiad2007/team.cfm]2007[/url”>Error Occurred While Processing Request]2007[/url</a>], but I remember from the previous years that some of those kids passed AP tests in 5-6-7 grades; and at 16-18 they were heading to MIT, Harvard, Princeton, Stanford… meanwhile, they took college courses, went to camps, did research and generally enjoyed their lives. So, don’t worry, your kid still can make it; no errors on your part, just keep going. :)</p>
<p>Keep in mind that intentionally slowing down a gifted kid academically can cause burnout down-the-line. The OP stated he was thinking of doing this.</p>
<p>If it’s not clear already, you are walking a tightrope here. Slowing the kid down is not the answer, although like others I agree there are much better alternatives than sending a kid to college early.</p>
<p>Don’t ship him to school so early. I had an Asian genius friend who graduated high school at 12 and was flown to UCLA at 14. </p>
<p>Trust me, he wasn’t happy camper.</p>
<p>There is more to life than HYP. Let your son be a kid and deal with college later. I see so many kids in my class who are being groomed for the elite schools yet clearly don’t possess the maturity or social ability to deal with the demands of top education. Developing a nice personality would be a handy supplement for a genius.</p>
<p>Everyone has offered excellent advice, Concerndad. I’d like to add another dimension, however. You have mentioned acceleration in math/science, but not in other disciplines. Your son clearly needs to be challenged every day, so I recommend challenging him in the disciplines that perhaps he is not quite as good at: English, history, government, psychology, foreign languages, art, writing. These other subjects will stimulate him intellectually, give him a a better context for his sciences, and force him to think in ways that he might not otherwise use. It doesn’t matter that he is not as good as them. Instead of signing him up right away for organic chemistry, have him read several literary classics. (I’m assuming his reading level is also high if he is getting 5’s on AP tests.) Or sign him up for French classes outside the classroom. Or maybe he likes to draw comics, and so you can sign him up for art classes. If his creativity and non-scientific way of thinking are also nourished/developed, then he will be better prepared for original scientific research. The best scientists are those who are able to drawn on knowledge gained from a wide array of disciplines. </p>
<p>You don’t want to deny him his math and science, but you might want to shift some of the academic emphasis to other areas. Don’t force him to accelerate in those; instead, encourage him to explore them. The same holds true for ECs: challenge him, but don’t pressure him. He needs to be ten, even if he is precocious. With a mind like his, I’m sure he’ll surprise you with what he does. The trick will be to let him develop both intellectually and personally, to allow him to both ten and a serious high school/college student, to prepare him for an independent life.</p>
<p>I want to thank all of you for the your excellent advice. I am impressed that there are so many knowledgeable and experienced parents on this board who are willing to share and provide me a balance perspective of things.</p>
<p>I have been reading and re-reading the advice given, and have learn a lot from you all. Among the advice, I find a few recurring theme that have been very helpful to me, and touched my heart are :
Do not deliberately slow down his math and science. Continue to find interesting things for him to do (lots of suggestions provided, including EPGY course, MIT openware, Olympiads, AMC, etc)
Do not neglect the liberal arts side. Encourage him to explore other disciplines outside math and science. No need to accelerate him… just let him try.
Let him be a kid at 10 and do kid stuff too. There are things like social skills and maturity that simply cannot be hurried. Let him take time to develop other aspect of his life.
Get him involved in sports, not as a steping stone to get into the HYPSM. Sports is good for his health and is the right thing to do. Many different sports have been suggested.
EC not that important until he reaches high school. Again, let him do fun things. Community service can come as a result of being involved in things that he is passionate about. Internship can come in later years.
Various other channels (Davidson YS), and early entrance programs (DITD, UW EEP, JHU) suggested. I am actually familiar with all these already, but thanks a lot for the suggestions too.</p>
<p>Actually my own thinking have been evolving over time too. About a year ago, I was highly interested in early entrance programs, and getting my kid into college as soon as possible. Now, I am less sure. After taking a look at the CV of many of the students on the Olympiad Team, Davidson Fellows, etc, I realised that there are many parents with exceptionally bright kids, who let them wait until 17/18 years old to enter college. Many of the super bright homeschooled kids waited too. I can still let my son sign up for some college level courses (or even online EPGY college courses) without getting him officially matriculated into college. Most important thing I am learning — I want my son to be happy, well adjusted and have a nice personality, and am not in a rush to get him anywhere.</p>
<p>I havne’t read through all of this but I can relate with my 12 year old cousin who’s also very gifted (but not as far ahead as your son). </p>
<p>If your child is anytihng like my cousin, it’s quite tough for him to be around kids in his age. He’s just so obsessed with science that that’s how he looks at the world around him- always analyzing and figuring out how things work and why they happen (can annoy the rest of us qiute a bit because we don’t know everything!). Even his choice of vocabulary is astounding that can make other kids feel stupid and not want to hang out with him or tease him in self-defense. While he has been able to have friends with other gifted kids in his school, he does not really have a true social life of his normal twin sister. He truly looks forever to the summers with CTY- even found a girlfriend! Right now, the parents are just doing what they can to help him grow socially and intellectually but they realize the limitations. They try not to think about what’s going to happen next year or the year after that, just taking one day at a time. </p>
<p>I’m amazed that you suggest that he should be doing something else besides his piano and schoolwork because the coursework in AP classes (and eventually university classes) are volumnious for a 10 year old. My cousin literally has NO time for anything except for maybe a few sax lessons and a tennis lesson once a week- he had to drop his chess lessons (which he loved) a couple years ago because he just didn’t have the time. Of course part of it is that his ADD and perfectionism eats up some of the time… Anyhow, consider the workload factor when figuring out how to keep him being 10 year old…because his "new* normal 10 year old friends won’t understand why he has so much work when they can do theirs in only 30 minutes.</p>
<p>Basically. let him do what he wants and he’ll be a happy kid. He knows what’s best for him.</p>
<p>You’ve summed up the suggestions very well. I also think that, apart from social/emotional issues, college is not a good place yet for your child. He is extremely lop-sided: very advanced in math & sciences and somewhat advanced in other areas. Colleges provide more flexibility than k-12 schools insofar as they allow students to take a mix of classes at different levels of difficulty;but in general, they assume a level of preparation commensurate to being a college student. Your child may not have attained that level in the humanities and social sciences by sheer fact of his age and lack of experience. It would be very disheartening if your child struggled in classes where his age put him at a disadvantage.</p>
<p>His youth actually allows him to explore areas of math and science that often fall outside the curriculum. Depending on where you live, you may be able to sign him up for a Math Circle. My S learned lots of very interesting math that way. Another area that has not been discussed is foreign languages. You sound like you are possibly coming from Asia. I would guess China. Does your child speak your native language? Would he be interested in picking up another language? His age is ideal for that. Through learning languages, he can also begin to learn about different cultures. Being so advanced in some areas may free up time for him to hone his artistic skills also.</p>
<p>He has plenty of time continue to pursue his interests and develop new ones, both academic and non-academic ones. Whatever he does, he will have a truly impressive profile. In other words, the last thing he needs to be concerned about now is college.</p>
<p>We have an accerlerated child. He was well advanced in math and science and had dreams of being an engineer. The funny thing is that at 9 and 10 their interests are not settled and even though my son skipped 7 grade and still well advanced in math and science( by 3 years) his interests changed drastically (gov’t and theatre). So you can plan all kinds of things but sometimes life will take them in another path. You have to be prepared for that. He began college this fall in a top LAC (which he chose for their student theatre). He has just turned 17 and is younger (almost by 2 years ) than his peers. I do regret allowing him to advance so quickly and entering college so young,( I worry about him) but he is well equiped emotionally and academically. He is doing well and most haven’t figured out his age. I think letting him explore other things helped. He is extremely well rounded and can fit in anywhere.He would say he did the right thing and is glad he went to college early. I miss him but he is probably right.</p>
<p>All have given excellent advice. I would just add that he can direct his own path, as all kids ultimately do. However, this is even more true for kids who are so unique.</p>
<p>You mention music. This is an area that uses math skills but teaches history and is a good outlet for developing emotions. Playing in orchestras/bands is a way to interact with like-minded who are at his level in something.</p>
<p>sideways makes a wonderful point that waiting a bit for college while encouraging continuing progress in math gives time for individual tastes to mature and destinies to materialize.</p>
<p>marite: There actually are prodigies in the Humanties they are just much more difficult to identify.</p>
<p>I taught myself to read at 18 months, and by seven was reading only adult fiction. I understood it perfectly. I don’t know how, but I did understand adult motivations, sexuality, psychology. I read Satre at ten and completely comprehended it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about what I was doing, but that wasn’t a worry. I found more books. I was probably the only ten year old in my world reading literary criticism.</p>
<p>I had read so much about relativity and quantum theory by sixth grade that I corrected my sixth grade teacher when he tried to teach Newton (okay, so my judgement wasn’t perfect.) I spent a lot of time sitting on the floor in hallways doing my own thing, which I thoroughly enjoyed.</p>
<p>I did score 800 on verbal SAT in seventh grade (not an amazing feat, I know.)</p>
<p>Reading and writing are independent. I didn’t need outside support so others didn’t know of this progress.</p>
<p>None of this matters now except that I had more time to absorb more material which does come in handy in teaching the very disparate course selection I am given.</p>
<p>BTW: There are really gifted child novelists (not me), poets (a bit more me). Rimbaud had completed much of his mature work by 16 and stopped writing by 19.</p>
<p>Echo what Momwaitingfornew #31, but all good advice. We are glad that we did not skip DS more than the one grade and only let him progress at the highest program in our school system, IB. We did not encourage more advanced programming at the local community college or university. While this may have held him back some, it kept his age peers in sight and social skills close to the norm. </p>
<p>He normally associated with kids at 1 year older (his academic class because of skip) to 2 years older than he was, but that was his choosing. Obvious age distinction matters less in college. </p>
<p>Social skills are much more important than facts and figures.</p>
Let him do what he wants; that will be impressive enough.</p>