Need Girl Advice. Please help.

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>So it's been a month and half (almost) of college, and I can't help but be really attracted to this one girl who lives just two doors down from me in my dorm floor. She's just amazingly pretty, nice, and most of all very intelligent.</p>

<p>Although we introduced ourselves to each other at the beginning of the year, we didnt really start to know each other better till last week, when I began hanging out with her more, and I realized we had similar tastes in music (we are both Beatlefreaks). </p>

<p>During last week I would pop into her dorm and sometimes play my guitar or just chat. One time we just sat and literally watched 5 episodes of Friends lol. I made her laugh a good amount during our conversations (I find that I am generally funny when I am not nervous). I've even started paying attention to the way I dress lol.</p>

<p>I've also complimented her a few times on how pretty she is, or how she looks great even without makeup on...so it may or may not be clear whether she knows I like her.</p>

<p>I also became really good friends with her roommate (we also have super similar music tastes) and I've been hanging out with her. I'm not attracted to her other than as a friend, and I told her that I had a crush on her roomie--she was really happy for me and said she would do what she could to help.</p>

<p>I had her casually bring up my name during a private conversation with "the girl," which basically went:</p>

<p>Friend: "I think it's really cute that Kyle hangs around here a lot, especially around you"
"The Girl": (jokingly) "Why, are you jealous?"
Friend: "No I just think it's really cute that he's always helping you and trying to make you laugh."
"The Girl": "Yeah he's a cool guy, but he can get a little distracting when I'm trying to do my work. Not that he's annoying as a person, it can just be kinda bothersome."</p>

<p>When my friend told me this I was like...UH OH. Am I getting too clingy? Do I need to back away? So, for the most of this week, I have not talked to her other than like a 15 second conversation we had yesterday. </p>

<p>Important factors: She is really religious (which is totally fine with me), and has church-related things almost every day, causing her to be gone often till the late evening. And when she does come back, she is busy with homework. I can sometimes catch her in the morning when she's off to class, but that's not an everyday thing. </p>

<p>Therefore, how can I get closer to this girl (whose time slots are really limited), without becoming that clingy guy that always wants to talk to her when she's around? *And if she's giving me the cold shoulder, how can I stop that? * Also any general tips for me? please, people with experience, I'd love your help. Thanks</p>

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<p>Lol, first take a step back and realize that you just made an essay-style description and analysis of a single sentence a girl said in passing. Not that I don’t feel you. I totally get where you are.</p>

<p>So, my girlfriend said something similar to a mutual friend who relayed the message to me (without her knowledge) a little before we started dating. When I next saw her, I commented on how much she studied and offered to study with her, playing it out like I was this super perceptive guy that did not just have this mini panic attack on whether I was being too forward. At first she was said she would get too distracted, but she eventually warmed up to it. When we were studying, I made it a point to actually study instead of talking to her at every chance I got. I only helped her out when she asked for it, and if I felt like I needed a legitimate second opinion on or explanation of something, I’d defer to her.</p>

<p>So yeah. People do need their space, and people do have different opinions on socializing and fulfilling priorities. Some people prefer to do both at the same time, others ask for space to concentrate on the task at hand. Just figure out what she wants and respect her desires. If it works out, all the more power to you. If not, it’s not the end of the world.</p>

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<p>You definitely sound too clingy. Randomly showing up to play guitar? Girls don’t like it easy and they don’t like being hounded. Try not to pay too much attention to her. Make her work for it.</p>

4

<p>Well, I sometimes stopped by just to play a bit of a song that I just learned, when her door was open. It was a good conversation starter. </p>

<p>How do I make her work for me? Keep in mind I really don’t have much time to interact with her…just a few minutes in the morning, and a few in the evening when we pass by in the halls. She thinks I’m nice and funny (I hope so on the second one lol), but what do I do from now? She’s always really busy or occupied with church stuff.</p>

5

<p>Don’t hang out with her as much and just chill with other girls. If possible, make her see that you’re with those girls and having a great time. This will make her think that you have other options and that she should step up her game. But honestly, this is college…don’t get oneitis and just chase any girl you find attractive. Live it up.</p>

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<p>Based on that comment, she doesn’t like you</p>

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<p>I have to agree with Wintergreen but you still have a chance. If you stick around you maybe be able to get her.</p>

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<p>Are you the same person as the OP? Why do you even have two accounts?</p>

9

<p>He probably wanted to keep more anonymous.</p>

<p>Anyway,

</p>

<p>Actually, do. That’s generally how you get laid.</p>

<p>But, here’s a trap many guys fall into. You think too much and over-analyze things.</p>

<p>The answer is simple: just step up to the plate and take a swing (metaphorically).</p>

<p>Who knows what kind of mood swings are occurring with this girl or what she thinks. She probably doesn’t even know. And you sure as hell can’t try to read minds.</p>

<p>Her comment to her roommate? Maybe she likes you but was trying to hide it or bush it off, a common knee-jerk reaction. She said you’re a “cool guy” - that’s not a bad sign.</p>

<p>I would ignore these people who always think you are “harassing” the woman and want you to play it safe or cool by ignoring her and getting nowhere.</p>

<p>The best way is to just flirt with her, and try to hang out with her one on one, where you can flirt with her and see how she responds.</p>