<p>which sounds better or is better?</p>
<p>So superior was our performance, that the President called the conductor on stage to praise us on our accomplishments.</p>
<p>or</p>
<p>So superior was our performance, that the President called our conductor on stage to share his astonishment with our triumph</p>
<p>if you have any other ways of writing it, dont be scared to reply. :)</p>
<p>I like the first better but im no grammar expert.</p>
<p>How about: Our performance was so superior...</p>
<p>or</p>
<p>Because our performance was so superior, the President...</p>
<p>does the 2nd one make sense?</p>
<p>the second sentence is not so good grammatically....stick with the first sentence</p>
<p>Do you mean "onstage" rather than "on stage"?</p>
<p>How about simply "praise our accomplishments"</p>
<p>i think adding "publicly" before "praise" would be good to really hit on the fact that he liked ur performance</p>
<p>get rid of the comma. you don't need it.</p>
<p>unless you used nonsequitured's suggestion, then a comma makes sense</p>
<p>make ur sentences byzantine and convoluted ain't gonna get u nowhere mate. clear, to the point and crisp sentences will get u in.</p>
<p>yeah, i agree</p>
<p>dont worry I have changed it to something easy and simple :)</p>