<p>This is just a "brainstorm" of what I want to concentrate on. I DO NOT intend on submitting this.</p>
<p>Q1
Choosing a major was probably one of the hardest decisions Ive had to make. My interest in Political Science came about through part-time employment at a law firm. This experience shed light on the development of my major. By having a chance to work as a lawyers assistant, I know that majoring in political science would not only pave a path to my interest in law but act as a precursor in preparing me for the subject matter and training me for the challenges of law school that lie ahead. Additionally, I have the chance to offer a service that would aide those overcome by hardships relative to my area of study. When I think about it, the moments that my employer brought in his clients and spoke in his assertive tone of a solution to their problem ran chills down my spine. The feeling you receive after helping an individual is, in my opinion, priceless. Despite my interest in law, political science provides an opportunity for me to expand my knowledge of the country in which I reside and explore the government, the frame that supports our nation. I felt that Ive always had the intention to learn about what makes the U.S. so great. By majoring in political science, Im given the opportunity to study about the country in which I reside and broaden my perspective of why it is the strongest nation in the world. Growing up in the U.S., I feel that I still have little knowledge about the pillars, the laws that support the government. Along with my interest in the government, my major acts as a precursor to law, my real interest, by teaching me about the basics of law and politics. I took the initiative in pursuing my education by working at a law firm this past summer which helped in sharpening my decision in choosing my major. From working at a law firm, Ive learned the importance of the laws contribution to our government and how it controls and organizes it.</p>
<p>Q2: Potential to Contribute
Friends can become an important asset to one's life by way of watching each others' back. One particular friend of mine set personal goals for himself the moment he realized that he wanted attend USC. He kept his (1) determination & (2) optimism high by (3) working hard towards his passion. His passion to become the best at whatever he did was contagious in that he achieved goals that no one, and in some cases not even his own family believed he could accomplish. This inspired me to mimic his mind set and was the final push that I needed to lead me to make my education my number one priority. He stressed the importance of putting all of your effort into anything that you do. I now set goals for myself and strive to achieve them just as he did.</p>
<p>Q3: Open-ended
As the youngest child of three, I will be the first to achieve a higher education (sounds like I'm whining?). For about 1 year, my parents, especially my mom, relied on me to care for my brother as he was recovering from schizophrenia. I feared that my brother's sickness would worsen if he didn't have proper support or guidance so I took the time to care for him when I wasn't at school. Thoughts of what affects this sickness could have on him in the long-run swarmed my mind and left me worried for days. I was left with an important responsibility that I couldn't refuse because when it comes to your family there are no exceptions. Battling my brother's illness may have affected my ability to work at my potential. Despite this, I had friends and parents to support me throughout it all. My parents were generous enough to let me attend SMC since they were known to have one the highest transfer rates of all California Community Colleges. They kept me motivated by getting involved in my schooling and placing interest in my future goals.</p>
<p>pretty good ideas. I liked the potential to contribute one the best. Due to the fact that i have created an essay answer similar to that on mine. I have talked to a lot of application reviewers and they all say that they want you to show not tell. it looks like you did trhat perfectly. Work on the grammar a little and you will have a strong response.</p>
<p>^^ what do you mean to show not to tell?
can you expand on that?
i don't get the 2nd answer, it says potential to contribute, yet i don't believe you mentioned anything that you'll be contributing to either the school or its communities.
i think the 1st and 3rd answers are both good!
but i am iffy on the 2nd answer</p>
<p>show not tell. means to kind of go more depth into what your arguing. for instance you want to give the reader a direct view into your life. so instead of saying i went to the mall. say i went to south coast plaza. i walked around . it was fun. i ate. that sort of thing.</p>
<p>on the question number two the application reviewer said to try to explain intellectual curiosity. he said that was looked upon pretty highly.</p>
<p>I like the first one best. I am jealous. :)</p>
<p>For the second one, u wrote USC... Did u mean UC?</p>
<p>Second one is the hardest one IMO.</p>
<p>Make sure to replace "aide" with "aid." It seems like you are set out to do good. I would work on just putting more of a structure to your answer to question 1. It seems like your ideas are out there though and that's an important step in the process.</p>
<p>Thanks for the input guys. Just to clarify, the reason why I put numbers beside 3 key points is because this is what I will contribute to the UC. To be honest, even though I have my ideas set out I'm still not satisfied. Something doesn't feel right... I'd love to hear what topics you guys are concentrating on in your UC Essays.</p>
<p>Sandkicks, I'll take that into consideration. Thanks. That is probably what I need to spice up my essay.</p>
<p>highschoolda, my friend up got accepted to USC for Fall 05'. Maybe I should put UC?</p>
<p>gabew42, thanks for catching that grammar mistake. Actually there are quite a few. haha. This is just a brainstorm though so it's no big deal.</p>
<p>yeah i noticed a lot of grammar mistakes but im sure you didn't even take the time to run through and clean the up. because it is still pretty early.Instead of USC just put a university. it doesn't have to be specific at all. Another thing i just remembered is that the essay reviewers don't favor the essays that tell about other people like your friend. They want to know about you and what you are like and not your friend. I'm not saying not to use your friend but just tone it down a little. I will post more if i can think of anything else. BTW what UC are you applying to.</p>
<p>nikkei, it's totally upto u. Just to be on the safe side, i wouldn't put USC. lol. WHo knows maybe some addmission person is an idiot. </p>
<p>But it's awesome u got started early. I am jealous </p>
<p>It will be a major struggle for me. Maybe cause I am applying as earth science. Everything that i did was chem and health related. But i have to write about something. SO i will write about how i went to Yosemite, Grand Canyon, and Alaska to "observe" natural phenomenons. Or something to that extent. There will be a lot of research type stuff there. </p>
<p>Essay #2:
Well last year as HS student i wrote about a lot of volunteering stuff that I did. Since i didn't do any of it this year, i can't write about it. Can I?</p>
<p>Essay #3:
There are several things that i could write about.
1. Working 30 hours a week and going to school
2. My life and various hardships.</p>
<p>I don't know. I don't write well. I just hope the essays don't hurt me. But i hear they have so much to read, they don't even read too thoroughly.</p>
<p>I'm applying to CAL, UCLA, UCI, UCSD & UCSB</p>
<p>thats cool im applying to ucla ucsb ucsd and ucsc. so goodluck</p>