I just looked at the facebook pics on the non tradition room. It looks nice to me, lots of floorspace and actually lots of room. My son was in a forced triple freshman year and it was crowded but worked out fine (and other students were in his colleges overflow room and they were later reassigned to other room as vacancies occurred). .
I read this thread because I had no idea what âNon-traditional housingâ was. Now I am completely horrified and every worst case scenario has run through my head (drugs/alcohol, boyfriends/friend visits, stolen stuff, privacy issues, etc. multilpied by 8 residentsâŠand anyone who walks through? This thread bothered me so much I shared it with my husband! I remember when my oldest headed off to college and how excited she was to make her space hers & meeting her roommate. If this had occurred with her university, we would have located an apt within walking distance, then demanded her deposit back, which is really sad since we believe it is very important for Fresh to be on campus. Knowing my husband, he may have put his foot down and made her go to her 2nd choice school. I am seriously impressed with the OP and her daughter for being so adaptable and willing to make the most of this situation!
@CTTC - Price break, well letâs see. Room and Board is $15k. Multiply that by 0 to get the discount we are getting. Yep, $0. No adjustment at all.
@4MyKidz - thanks for your comments. Believe me, all of the possibilities have gone rolling through my mind. We live 30 minutes away - should she commute? After half a second, I said âNo way.â I would demand to move her to another room first. Should we move her off campus? Also a No, for many reasons. So Iâm really taking my lead from my daughter. I told her if she wants me to insist she be moved, I will. She wants to give it a try and will decide how she feels after a couple of weeks. To say I am impressed with her would be an understatement. She is a great kid who has always been comfortable in her own skin and can bob and weave through drama. She despises it but somehow manages to not engage and just keeps along her merry way. All the while, making some great friends. I feel like somehow, somewhere, we must have done something right. 
We also have always made our kids navigate through challenges at age appropriate levels. We offer guidance and support but she has to own it. Sheâs been handling virtually everything since high school. She has been interacting with Residence Life asking all of her questions (e.g. what about the windows into the hallway - how do those get covered? what is the square footage? Can we take the bunk beds apart? Can she visit the space since it wasnât one of the rooms she saw during campus visits or orientation.) I draw the line at safety and will interfere with a vengeance if I feel she is at risk. Fortunately, we have a good open relationship and I trust her to tell me what is going on and she knows I will step in like a momma bear if she needs me to. Been there, done that, once or twice.
This is as much a growing up process for me as it is for her. I have to let her make decisions. I have to trust her judgment and I have to rely on the fact that we have built up a lot of trust over 18 years so that she will come to us when she needs us. WAY easier said than done. But Iâm trying. (Having this board as an outlet really helps too!)
@Hangdog Sounds like your daughter has a great head on her shoulders! My daughter is a Sr this year and has dealt with a few roommate issues. The contract is only as good as the RA is in enforcing it. My daughter is very independent and has a low tolerance for crap. That being said she has learned some valuable communication skills and how/when to escalate problems to the housing director if necessary. Better to nip problems, kindly and personally, in the beginning than it is to wait till the middle of the school year and the situation & your mindframe /patience is worse.
Living so close will give her one BIG advantage - she can swap out her clothes as the seasons change, and doesnât need to have everything on the first day. She can also come home once a week to do her laundry, have a good meal, and take a long shower.
Donât be surprised if some of her friends tag along.
@4MyKidz some colleges require freshman to live ON campus unless they reside with their parents within a commuting distance.
I think this is likely a bigger issue for the parents than for the studentsâŠwho sound like they already are making the best of the situation.
My kids went to a music campâŠwith expensive instruments and clothingâŠand shared an open space with 12-20 kids (depended on which cabin they were assigned to). OhâŠand the bathrooms were in some other buildingâŠnot attached. They survivedâŠnever lost anything, nothing got stolen, and they made some great friends. Sure, there was always one slob in the groupâŠbut it didnât seem to matter. And yesâŠthis was in high school, not in grade school.
Both would have adapted to 8 in shared quarters.
@thumper1 Yes, Iâm aware of this requirement as my oldest is now a Sr. in a college that requires Freshman and Sophmores to live on campus. Doesnât matter really, when the school over enrolls and has to get creative like this to meet studentsâ needs. I have no doubt, that if a family were uncomfortable with this creative solution that the school would make exceptions to the requirement of having to stay on campusâŠmay take a few phone calls/emails/meetings with housing director/office of vp student affairs/president of univâŠbut, believe me, it can be done if someone wanted to go that route.
Kudos to yaâll and your camp/military experiences. But that was camp not college/university and lasted maybe a month or two, not 9 months and was an expected living condition. I think it is unreasonable. Studying and personal space are important especially when you are already juggling the issues associated with adjusting to college life, living away from home, new academic demands , throw in 8 different personalities and that is A LOT to deal with as a freshman. You want to squash kids in together, make it the upperclassmen who are at least used to college. Or better yet tell upperclassmen they have to find off campus housing and only guarantee housing to freshmen. Frankly, OP your daughter (and) you must be saints because honestly this would have me livid. Particularly, at Quinnipiac where you are paying $40K plus to attend. It would not have been ok in my book. It happens more and more routinely and that is not ok either.
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@labegg Wish I could like ^^^THIS^^^ a thousand times!
Youâd likely hate the dorming arrangements with domestic students in the ROC(Taiwan) in the '50s/early '60s when my older relatives attended university or in Mainland Chinese universities at the end of the '90s I observed firsthand in which 6-8 students are crammed into a room the size of a small cramped US double with 2 rows of bunk beds, a long table with benches, and oneâs âcloset spaceâ is basically a locker the size of a 1-1.5 foot square HS gym locker.
And all bathrooms were allocated by floor or section of a floor which meant it was shared by at least 50 other students.
In the military, especially in previous decades, one could be placed in a large room with 12-20+ others for much longer than 9 months.
During my uncleâs 2 years as an enlisted conscript in the '50s eraâŠhe had to stay in a room with 20 others for the entire 2 years of his mandatory service period. Older neighbors who were conscripted in the US military during the '50s and before had similar accounts of sleeping in large rooms with a dozen or more men for periods far longer than 9 months.
And thatâs not bringing up those stationed aboard ships where space is even more at a premiumâŠor worseâŠsubmarines.
The OP has the option of withdrawing and finding another collegeâŠor,taking a gap year.
Iâm betting the daughter would rather deal,with the housing issue than leave the school.
Quinnipiac has housing issuesâŠand this is NO secret. The school,has grown and grownâŠand their new housing has not kept pace. And the off campus housing near the school is at a premium too.
What I find very annoying is that these students are not somehow being compensated for this housing shortage thing. At least at my kidâs schoolâŠthe forced triple occupants were given a reduction on their room cost.
It sounds like the girls are working this out.
^Yes, my D was also compensated for her triple that first semester. The school has also made monetary offers to those juniors who choose to take study abroad in the fall vs. spring, which apparently frees up room as well.
Agreed. There should be some compensation for cramming more students in non-standard more cramped living conditions.
CollegesâŠespecially private colleges with their tuition price tags shouldnât use this as another cash cowâŠ
@cobrat âIn the military, especially in previous decades, one could be placed in a large room with 12-20+ others for much longer than 9 months.â
LOL, this is comparing apples with oranges. Even the military, upon completion of basic training, sends their graduates (many who are 18-21 yr olds) off to tech school where they live in dorms (2 to a dorm). AND then you must stay in military housing (also 2 to a room) until you make E3/E4 or you are married. Not even the military expects these young folks to live in 8 person common rooms for any long duration of timeâŠunless itâs basic training, exercises, or deployments. I will also state that the mindset of a trained soldier/airman is a bit different than a 18 year old college Freshman.
That has only happened within the last 2 decades.
Back in my parentsâ generation and from many other accounts well into the early '80s, most soldiers/veterans would have wondered what one was smoking if an enlistee/conscript was housed with only one other person.
My Naval Aviator cousin shared accommodations with 1-2 other junior officers while he was stationed aboard a carrier for long deployments during the '90s and at the Federal Service Academies, I know for a fact some cadets were placed 3-4 to a room. Some of them would likely be peeved current enlistees are getting better accommodations with more privacy than they did. .
@cobrat Forgive me, but I do not understand your point or how 20 yr old military history applies to the OPâs situation. These kids have NOT enlisted. They are NOT getting a pay check from their schools. Most of the time parents and/or students are paying the tuition and housing. Quality of on campus housing is an important charateristic when deciding on which schools to attend. If I knew that this housing situation would be a possibility for my daughter, this school would not have been on her list. This is just my opinion. Others may decide quality of housing isnât as important a factor.
If the kid whoâs actually going to be living in the room is taking it in stride, all you can do is deal with it.
Maybe consider it a practical lesson about rolling with the punches?
I think if Harvard said they were putting 8 kids in every room and charging double and feeding them oatmeal for every meal, people would still line up to attend. The competition would come when Yale said it was offering luxury singles with maid service daily, or Stanford said they were having 5 star chefs in all dining halls. It might pull a full of the top Harvard students out of line, but there would be 10 more students to take their places.
If U of Idaho said they were having singles AND gourmet dining? Not much movement from those HYS lines. On the Quinnipiac tours next year, the students will see the 8 student rooms and decide for themselves if they want that experience. Some will, some wonât.
Iâd be freaking out, but my kid has anxiety and sleep issues. I second or third the recommendation not to bring a fridge. My daughter never used one until her senior year, when she was actually cooking for herself, and in that case, the school provided it. Her first year roommate brought one for them to share, and they stored their gummy vites in it. Yes, that was it. If your d is on a full meal plan, she doesnât need a fridge.
The main thing is that all the girls in your daughterâs room have to realize that they are living in a barracks. They canât be entitled, spoiled or selfish. They have to agree from the start to have certain quiet hours and lights out hours. And the pot dealer needs to just keep her habits out of the common space.
Yes,i would expect a discount on the room charge and I would expect not to have to ask for it.