<p>Judging from posts, it looks like you will both be at UC-I. My brothers & I --- they are twins & we are a year apart --- went to the same VERY small school together back in the dark ages. Even at a tiny school, we were never in each other's way. In fact, our experiences were all so different. One brother left after a year. The other brother & I rarely even saw each other around campus (and it was a small one). It simply was a non-issue. I would think your school is plenty big for two!! Truthfully, I don't think you will find it to be a problem at all.</p>
<p>I totally understand your feelings. My two did not want to be in the same school at all, and I did not want them in the same school unless it was very large. There are enough schools in this country that one would think that siblings could each find a good fit. Lucky for us, it worked out fine and my kids are in separate locations that suit each of them.</p>
<p>However, if the decision has already been made, there's not much you can do but make the best of it. I suggest you request that you are not in the same dorm if possible.</p>
<p>30+ years ago, the college my sister attended was my #1 choice UNTIL it came to make my final decision. The fact that she was already enrolled there was the single deciding factor in my deciding to go elsewhere.</p>
<p>However, I did go to college with several sibling pairs (a set of sisters and 3 brother-sister combos) and they never seemed to be in each other's way. In fact, I was jealous since it seemed to me that the younger of the two already knew a lot of people when they arrived. Having a ready-made set of friends seemed to make things a lot smoother in the beginning.</p>
<p>University of Delaware graduated 10 sets of twins last week :)</p>
<p>Well My twin boys absolutely refused to go to the same college. They applied to some of the same schools but I could hear them discuss schools and I went something like "if you are going to go there then I can go here" type discussion.</p>
<p>They really wanted their independence and felt it was time to be away from each other for awhile.</p>
<p>I can understand the poster completely. However it is not his call where his sister goes and it is something you just have to deal with.</p>
<p>I'm female and went to the same undergraduate small LAC (2800 students) as my big brother, although I was a freshman the year he was a senior. As others reported, we rarely saw each other, perhaps twice each semester. We didn't even share rides coming and going at vacation times. Our circles of friends didn't overlap, we ate in different locations, and lived on polar ends of the campus; but probably because in those days the men and women were housed quite separately (before coed dorms). </p>
<p>My parents relied too much on the fact that he was there and assumed (wrongly) that he'd look after me a bit. For my freshman orientation, they didn't go but just flew me out there and had him drive all of our "stuff" out together in a car when he had to report for classes a week later. I can still recall his grumpy face, driving up with the boxes, and saying: "There." Who knows if he had a hard trip, but there was nothing, no hug, no welcome, no help carrying up boxes. </p>
<p>If you feel resentful, I hope you can work it out enough beforehand to at least realize that for her, this will be her one-and-only college experience. If you haven't smiled yet and told her you're pleased, she's probably already realized you are sour, or at least worried, about it. If she has a heart at all, as I did, she probably feels badly, or she will the first time she comes up to you bubbly and you turn your gaze away hoping she departs quickly.</p>
<p>Unless you own the college, I don't think you have the right to make her feel badly for her decision. How much skin is it off your back to be gracious and friendly? </p>
<p>Also, you didn't mention talking this over with your sister. Can you? Do you have the kind of communication where you can say, "We both chose a great school, but can we please talk about how we can handle things so we both have some joy and space, to be supportive but not interfering, once you start there?" If you say it fairly cheerfully, it might open up a good talk between two maturing young adults.
Your parents won't be in the middle, and your new relationship will be whate4vert the 2 of you decide it can be. Now, there's a challenge for you to think about... </p>
<p>Most likely you won't see her much on campus, and if you do, she's just another person with a life. Maybe she's worried about bumping into YOU, but is too nice to say it, feeling instead that the education and community there is "right fit" for her and she hopes YOU won't spoil it for her! Have you thought about it that way? There are two people involved here.</p>
<p>If you are less concerned about your borders and boundaries, you might find you have a true friend, ally and compatriot in your sister. She'll be loyal to you when nobody else would, since she's family; it's hard to reproduce that loyalty in friends.
Just some thoughts from the little sister's perspective.</p>
<p>P.S., Ten years after graduating, I met my future husband who had gone to the very same college and was a friend (not inner circle, but friendly) with my brother, same graduating year. My future H and I barely knew each other then, just a waving acquaintance, so we barely recognized each other ten years later.<br>
We were at a conference, wearing those "hello, I'm.." nametags. Seeing my unusual last name, his ice-breaker line to me was, "Aren't you X's sister?" and we were married 6 months later.</p>
<p>Today, my brother has evolved a lot. Today he feels happy and proud we went to the same college, as well as being tangentially responsible for bringing together his old pal and little sister. </p>
<p>My point is, that none of this can be planned, so lightening up is probably a good idea. You can't control things, but you can control how you respond to things. How graciously and humorously you react to your sister's arrival on campus might be a measure
of you. Perhaps you can show your best self to yourself, and accept the situation with a smile?</p>
<p>I followed my one-year-older sister to a large state u.
We rarely saw each other. In the two years we were on campus together (I was overseas the third year) we would meet about twice each semester to have lunch, or attend a party, movie, play or church together. We had to schedule these meetings--can't remember ever running into her by chance.</p>
<p>My other choice would have been attending a smaller college with my twin sister--and I decided that wouldn't be a good thing for me.</p>
<p>Our younger brother was a freshman at the same U. my senior year. I remember seeing him once or twice. He left after one year (or was it a semester?) Years later I wondered if I should have tried to do more to help him out, but I didn't even realize he was unhappy until he quit.</p>
<p>Heck, there were four of us in the same high school of about 2700 students. We never saw each other there, either.</p>
<p>Anyway, don't worry. If the school is any size at all, chances are you'll have to really go out of your way to see your sister. </p>
<p>If you fuss too much your parents will wonder if you are trying to hide something that you're afraid sis will discover and report back to them.<br>
Keep quiet and let your sister do what she wants.</p>
<p>That would be my thought, if my oldest was drinking too much, skipping school, was embarrassed by their own behavior getting reported back, or are you embarrased by your sister?</p>
<p>It wouldn't matter if the school had 1,000 or 100,000 students, my sister and I would have NEVER wanted to be at the same school. I'm the little sister to someone who's smart, pretty, interesting, and who just always seems to have it all together; the elementary school years I spent under her shawdow-naturally answering to her name-were quite enough to make me appreciate leaving that behind in 6th grade. From 6th grade on out we've gone to different schools, and I got be known as myself and not "So-and-so's little sister". I simply never could have filled her shoes, especially as we got older and turned into two very different people. I have my own equally good standards, and I wouldn't have wanted to constantly be expected to live up to my sister's. She graduated college just as I was entering college, but I still couldn't have ever considered going where she went. But it was never as issue or concern because had very different ideas of what kind of schools would best suit us, and I never would have fit at Wake and she never would have fit at Frostburg. Unfortunately, you can't stop it if your sister is bound and determined to be at the same school. Hopefully it's a big school and you can establish clear boundaries that will give both of you lives that are 100% seperate from each other.</p>
<p>You know I have a similar situation.<br>
D1 is rising junior at university. D2 applied and was accepted at same schools. After much debate and consideration (and input from D1 as to all of the negatives about University, D2 ultimately chose D1's college.
They will not be near each other on campus (applied of opposite end of campus) and will probably have entirely dif circles of friends. </p>
<p>I think D1 is now glad D2 will be there somewhere....and D2 is too. They are as dif as night and day. D1 language oriented. D2 Math. D1 social and likes parties, hanging with cooler people. d2 likes more nerdier types. D2 picked the school because it is academically more challenging and better reputation. </p>
<p>My point is while part of you doesn't want her there for one reason or another....if she does go there you can live separate lives....but be there in case of emergency to help one another. </p>
<p>You are mature enough to talk and establish ground rules (just like you do with your roommate). You are also mature enough to knw that your relationship with your siblings evolves from a competitive environment (for attention of parents) to friendship.</p>
<p>I would suggest that you and sister discuss these issues without parents. Let her make her decision or it may forever blemish your relationship. It is after all her education too.</p>