My experience tracks with @Sherpa–I met/talked with coaches on unofficials (since I was there anyway as transportation) , but was fully hands off on the OVs (pretty sure my daughter would have disowned me if I even suggested tagging along for those).
I would just make the distinction between “tagging along” and meeting with the coach at the end of the visit. The latter seems entirely reasonable, particularly if the arrangements are made in advance.
D3 experience only – pretty much on all my kid’s visits, the coach invited parents into the coach meeting, and let us know the approximate time so we could meet player there. At most of the schools, coach offered lunch with assistant or head coach while student had lunch with players and the other coach. Generally, most of the coaches we met said they wanted to get to know the families. From our perspective, it was helpful for one parent to be in the coach meeting to unpack “coach speak” and ask the follow up questions that the player wasn’t thinking about.
@sherpa @Finalthree @Midwestmomofboys I am quite a shy person. How do I come off as a likeable person ans someone who would be an asset to the team?
Ask questions on the visit – a lot of them. The coaches will be impressed with your thoughtfulness and curiosity, and the athletes on the team will be flattered by your interest in their experiences and opinions. Of course, also make it clear to the coaches and athletes that you like the school and the team. If the school and team happen to be your top choice, then tell them that.
Your common ground is the sport, so that should be helpful for conversation. Remember that the coach wants you there, so my only advice is to have a ton of questions to ask about the sport, the school, the coach, why they chose the school, what other schools they were looking at, whats the biggest adjustment to college sports, etc. They should be looking to make you feel welcome. (And if not it may not be the right school.) My daughter is also very shy and the only advice I gave her was to just be herself and show interest. At the school she ultimately chose the girls did a good job of making her feel very welcome. Good luck!!
Goggle, you don’t want to come off as “likeable,” you want to come off as yourself. Before meeting with the coach, go into your room in front of the mirror. and work on your “elevator speech.” Imagine the coach has asked “tell me something about yourself.” Answer the question out loud stating three distinct points about yourself. For each point, give an example of what that means. So, let’s say that one of your points is that you are disciplined. You would say, “well, I am a disciplined person. For example, I played three sports in high school and on a club team. That meant that I had to focus on my responsibilities and organize myself to make sure I got everything done.” Next, go to the schools sport website and review the program. Look at the stats. Determine the strengths and weaknesses of the program. Take note of how many seniors will graduate and what team positions will need to be filled. Armed with that information, write down several questions that you want to ask the coach about the program, remembering that the question will tell the coach something about you and your interests. So, for example, if you ask how many athletes spend a semester abroad, that might not be a good question to ask for a D1 program because it means that you want to spend time away from the team. Many of your questions will be asked in the give and take of the discussion with the coach. Try to hold at least one back for the end, when the coach will as “do you have any questions?”
Just plan and prepare, and you will be great.
@Rowers Dad my son is going on an OV and the coach sent an itinerary ahead of time. It includes a meet & greet with the parents at a specific time/place. It is clear that the rest of the weekend is for players/recruits only.
He is doing a series of OV visits for multipke recruits so they get a chance to meet each other. The visit is for those who are already ‘committed’. This is D3 lacrosse.
I just went on my first trip- a D1 ivy and I loved every second.
Here’s a rundown of what happened (wish I could have read one before I went)
I drove into campus (only an hour drive from my house). I then chatted with the coach for a while until my host came to pick me up. We dropped all my stuff back at her room (it was super cute) and went to the dining hall to have dinner. I loved how everyone on the team ate together. We then went to the upperclassmen girls’ house and watched the season premiere of a tv show that everyone loved. We just chatted and ate snacks, and it was a super chill evening. We then went back to her room to go to bed (I slept in her bed and she in her roommates bed).
Friday morning they had a weightlifting session super early, so we went to that, but after about 29 minutes the other recruits and i decided to get some swimming in. We then all showered and got ready for the day. After breakfast I had a bunch of meetings with the strength coach, academic advisor, and the head coach, and somewhere in there I ate lunch. I got the chance to see 3 classes on Friday- from a huge lecture, to a 15 person discussion. Then they had practice again, and the other recruits and I got some time to talk. That evening, after dinner, we went to a volleyball game and it was super cool to see everyone get so excited. After that we had a girls night at the same upperclassmen house and played charades and at snacks. It might sound lame, but it was super nice to just hang out with the girls on the team. ( the school also had a very strict no partying policy for recruiting trips.) we then went to bed.
Saturday morning we all had breakfast together, and then I had to go back to the pool to meet my parents. Overall, it was a great weekend, exhausting, but great. This school is definitely my top choice!