Overcoming shyness

<p>Im the same way Knavish. Im really a sweetheart but its so much easier to stay quiet than to muster up a confident sturdy "thank you" or "no problem."</p>

<p>Drink. A lot.</p>

<p>I have a shy problem too but mine is not as common (n i can't find help anywhere :(</p>

<p>For me it's VERY easy to talk for a long time and enjoy a conversation with almost anyone even strangers 1 on 1. However i find it xtremely hard to be myself in a group. I get really shy and insecured and confused. Too many ppl, too many opinions, i don't knwo which to deal with. I just can't be confident in a group with more than 5 ppl and i'm always afraid some1 in the group thinks of me negatively or something... blah blah blah. yea i really hate it. </p>

<p>I know how to keep a conversation, thats y i'm good at talking 1 on 1.
but in a group when ppl "have fun", i get really shy although i do enjoy the activity they're in... and in a group, ppl fight and interrupt each other to talk, i can't do that. some ppl r loud, makes me even more insecured... so any help is appreciated =)</p>

<p>That sunglasses thing sounds really good! I'm going to try it!</p>

<p>What I've always done was made friend with my friend's friends. Then if we're good I make friends with their friends and the more I am around people, the more obligated I feel to speak. If I'm desperate, I actually go up to someone and pretend like I have a question. Sometimes we become friends or nice aquantances.</p>

<p>Gaining confidence in oneself is the key to overcoming one's shyness.</p>

<p>Hey, if your friends own cell phones, text messaging is renowned for people who are shy - individuals find it much easier to "txt" than to talk - you might become even better friends because it will be easier to communicate and more often via text messaging. You might even try setting up a chat room or message group.</p>

<p>I also realize people take advantage of my "niceness," maybe because I am shy. Damn! Hate myself for being shy.</p>

<p>yeah the niceness thing tends to suck. you should try to strike up a conversation on something really funny, that attracts people, with whom you can talk. Thats what I do nyways.</p>

<p>There is a difference between being shy (which is okay) and being anti-social. Some people are just not going to be as outgoing. But there are ways to do both and just have a happy medium. Wanting to change and confidence are the biggest part of being outgoing.</p>

<p>Everyone knows u need confidence. The tricky part is getting it.</p>

<p>I finally found my post on confidence:</p>

<p>Another thing is not necessarily trying to be more outgoing. Something easily done in high school is an effort to increase your confidence. I tried to work on this before I went to college and once I arrived. I'm still not that confident (on the inside) but people believe I am and that makes being confident on the inside much easier. Stand taller. Smile more. Walk slower. Try to exercise 2-5 times a week. Wear clothes you feel comfortable and good-looking in.</p>

<p>Try to pick out something (or a few) that you like about yourself everyday (physical and/or personality-wise.) [Warning these examples will sound cheesy/stupid but that is why they are kept in your head and not told to other people.] Inner thought comments such as, 'I like the way my pecs look and I am outgoing' or 'This shirt looks awesome on me & I studied really hard last night and am prepared for the quiz today' could be typical morning-in-front-of-the-mirror examples.</p>

<p>Notice improvements no matter how small (like how you said hi and conversed with the girl/boy you liked or how your face is clearing up or your teeth are getting whiter) because if you go for big change right away, it ain't happenin'.</p>

<p>If anybody compliments you, take it and keep it in your pocket because remembering little compliments can always keep you up whenever you feel ****ty or something.</p>

<p>Name a few things you want to improve on and make specific goals about them. Anytime you come closer, feel better about yourself (EX: General Goal: I want to become more outgoing. Specific goal: I will talk to somebody at my college meeting today.)</p>

<p>I can't think of any other techniques off the top of my head. Remember, you might be naturally introverted so trying to be more talkative probably won't work. But increasing your confidence is an activity for any personality & meeting new people is a chance to be outgoing whether you're introverted or extroverted.</p>

<p>i was a loner up til high school.
In middle school i was still painstakingly shy. I had no friend. one day i saw this group of 3 ppl who seem nice and i would fit in w/ them well. So one day i came up to them and ask like: hey u guys r new to this school rite? i am too...yea yea yea. We stay friends til now =) i found out they weren't as intimidating as i thought they would be.</p>

<p>I think the best thing that made me more confident is to think that other ppl r just like me. They're all just teenagers, it's not like they bite =) Over the years, i found out a lot of ppl r insecure also. If i talk to them and they dont seem like they like me (which happen a lot of the time, i just dont have good 1st impression), most of the times itz not cuz they dont like me but cuz they're "afraid" of me (ppl say i look intimidating lol). we ended up being friends later on.
What i'm trying to say is just imagine ppl are insecure and uncool and u'll have ur confidence. Imagine inside all that coolness, confidence ppl have lies another shy teenager like u.</p>

<p>Another way is to evaluate the consequences. So wat if that person doesn't like u when u talk to them? who cares right? at least u know if that person's worth it or not. No1 is worth ur friend if he/she's not nice to u. Just think about it. It can't be all that bad.</p>

<p>There are things u r better than ppl, and think about would increase ur confidence.</p>

<p>=)</p>

<p>Yeah, I hate it when I try to speak with some new people and they bust out their attitude.</p>