Trouble Making Friends 1st Semester

<p>I’m in my third week on a very big campus and I don’t have many friends. I have 3 friends from HS that live on the other side of campus, but I want to make friends with people I don’t know. So far I’ve made 1 friend that I’ve only seen twice because we don’t have any classes together. There are also a handful of people who know my name, but I forgot theirs and rarely see them too. I’m a science major and live in the art/music dorm, so the people I live with aren’t usually the people I see in class. </p>

<p>I don’t know if I look approachable. In class people sit next to me, but will make conversation with someone else. Sometimes I’ll want to walk up to a person and introduce myself or butt into a conversation, but either I’m nervous or don’t know if it’d be too awkward. I usually eat by myself. I’ve tried sitting at tables with random people. Sometimes I meet some really great people (but I have yet to see them again), and sometimes the person looks like they’d rather not talk. And I’ve joined a few clubs but they’ve only met a couple of times.</p>

<p>When I first moved in, I tried befriending my roommate but he seemed kind of stand-offish so I stopped. He looks a little upset whenever I enter the room., and I admit I feel the same way too sometimes. It’s normal for us to go the whole day without saying anything to each other and that makes me uncomfortable.</p>

<p>I was never very sociable and can honestly say that the summer after my senior year is the first time I ever went out with a group of friends regularly. But here I don’t have a friend or group that I can hang out with. So I spend most of my time at the library, the gym, or watching movies in my dorm.. </p>

<p>Any advice?</p>

<p>You should join a club that is of interest to you, or a campus service organization, where you might meet people with common interest. Intramural sports are also good options</p>

<p>Try saying hi to people or starting conversations with people in class. What about your room mate? And try finding if there are other people from your same high school.</p>

<p>well i think its difficult for new comer to make unlimited friends in his first few days so you have need to communicate to the others first then try to make friends because when they will know you then they will take interest .
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<p>“You should join a club that is of interest to you, or a campus service organization, where you might meet people with common interest. Intramural sports are also good options”</p>

<p>This.</p>

<p>Something you said stands out to me. You said “I don’t want to hang out with them.” Is there any particular reason you don’t want to hang out with your friends from HS? Maybe you have judged them and are looking for “better” people to hang out with. If this is the case then that is the root of your problem. Being socially aware is knowing when you are judging people for the wrong reasons and then thinking about ways to counteract that. Try to stay positive and if you notice yourself putting others down in your mind by comparing them with other friends of yours you may have negatively judged someone. Negative judgment is the best way to lose friends and maintain a lonely life. </p>

<p>That being said, you are only on campus for three weeks. Don’t stress out. No matter what decisions you make you will earn someones respect. But first you have to learn to give it. That takes time, self-awareness, and motivation. Luckily for you college facilitates all three quite well if you are looking.</p>

<p>It just takes time getting the hang of the college environment; don’t feel so rushed to make buddies your first year. Sure, it would be great if you can but just use your first year to get good grades and explore a bit to find your niche. I’ve been literally going to a bunch of clubs lately and i’ve met some interesting people - people whose names i’ve already forgotten, and people who actually call me, text me, or facebook me to hang out and get together. Just explore a bit and join some clubs. You’re bound to find your group eventually, just don’t rush because you might end up in a group of not very good people.</p>

<p>I would def suggest joining clubs. That way the students you meet will have something in common! Or going to events on campus, again these are all students who are going out just like you!</p>