Painful day

<p>We know a Florida princess who is 5’9" and loves the job. But FYI- no college.</p>

<p>Height is an issue though not an insurmountable one. My D ended up focusing more on classical and dramatic acting in college rather than MT mainly due to her CAP21 pre-college experience–except for one other girl all the other girls, and every one of the boys!, were noticeably shorter and it is an issue in casting if the lead males are shorter! It was also a challenge in high school that her agent couldn’t put her up for teenager parts for the stage–hard to play younger when you are as tall or taller than the actors playing the parents or other adult characteres. She is 5’ 9.5" and sure wished she could have been a few inches shorter back then, though now she is finally embracing it. Stephanie J. Block, at 5’ 9", has had a great career but she has mentioned in interviews how many times she did not get a part for being too tall. This is not to discourage anyone, but just to be realistic–it’s just one more element to deal with that you can’t do anything about–so look for ways to make it work for you. Sometimes the taller ones are chosen for ensemble for dancing roles due to their statuesque appearance. Actors all seem to look taller on-stage than they really are!</p>

<p>We’re having one of those “painful days.” It was very helpful to return here and read the advice, and know that we are not alone. I had already used most of this advice, but it’s good to get the reinforcement. For all of you who contributed to this post, thank you, and remember each of our kids needs their turn to feel lousy, so they can really appreciate it when they get their chance to shine. (I say to myself).</p>

<p>Hang in there.</p>

<p>I’m on the opposite end: I’m a short guy (I’m about 5’8"), still growing, but I still feel like I may have been discriminated against more than once already because the majority of the girls they liked were taller, as tall or just slightly shorter than me and all the other guys they liked were at least 5’11 (“they” being auditors). I was actually chastised for my lack of height once by a casting director (she said I was “too short” to ever amount to anything in theater…please note that she was about 5’3"). All I have to say to that is: “Darren Criss, anyone? Or how about Daniel Radcliffe? Matthew Broderick?” Too short my butt.</p>

<p>But it’s still a set-back…unless it’s Franki Valli.</p>

<p>Anyway…</p>

<p>I’m sorry to hear about your daughter. As an actor, I more than understand the crushing feeling when you discover that you “didn’t get it”, even though your audition was stellar. It sucks. I get through the rest of my day, doing what I need to do and then I get to sulk for a few hours. I go workout. I sing really loudly in the shower and annoy the snot out of my roommates, I blast “Rose’s Turn” at top volume. I watch “Glee” or “Smash” or movie musicals. Sometimes, if I can, I vent to a friend.</p>

<p>Then, either when I wake up the next morning or I tell myself “enough is enough” and I sit down at my piano and learn a new song or read a new play or learn a new monologue. I have to remind myself that I want this more than anything and that I have to keep going. Sleep usually helps. The best analogy I can use is: “when you fall off a horse, the first thing you do is get right back on and keep riding”.</p>

<p>This business is cruel and unforgiving. Most of the time, your daughter won’t get any feedback as to WHY she didn’t get the role. For now, she may have that luxury, but if she’s serious about this, she needs to realize that 99% of the time, it’s going to be a big, fat, heartless no aimed right at her.</p>

<p>This is a wonderful thread that I will stow away for those days when daughter or I have to take our Vitamin No. I have a feeling we will be in for several large doses in the coming weeks and months, and so am very glad to have this reference.</p>

<p>“Vitamin NO”… so perfect! :)</p>

<p>thumbs up for coining a phrase. thumbs down for having to use it!</p>

<p>I agree that the audition process is messy, and there are many factors that go into the decision as to who gets what part. However, regardless of the part, if our son auditions, he follows through and does the show, and he doesn’t regret it. </p>

<p>Our son primarily performs with our regional Children’s Musical Theater, which is highly regarded and competitive (having received 8 National Endowment of the Arts awards), and while he pretty much always makes final callbacks for lead roles, he sometimes gets them, and sometimes he doesn’t and is cast in a much smaller vocal role. It depends on the role, the type, and the other performers auditioning, but regardless of the role, he loves performing and he wouldn’t leave the show because of the role he got. He pretty quickly gets over the disappointment when he doesn’t get a lead, especially given there are so many talented kids. </p>

<p>He’s now playing Benny in “In the Heights,” which fits his type perfectly. Before this, he was one of the students in a semi-professional production of Les Miz, and I think he got more out of that experience than when he played Jean Valjean in a high school production 6 months earlier. He once played the male lead in Aida, and a second time, he was in the ensemble. He knows that whatever the role, you can still work on your skills and learn and have a great time from the experience.</p>

<p>He has been accepted in 2 audition BFA programs thus far and is waiting to hear from 5 others, so you don’t have to always get the lead role to get in. In fact, at our regional Children’s Musical Theater, over the past 5-6 years, I can only think of 2 or 3 kids that consistently got one of the lead roles.</p>

<p>A longtime friend of our family has been a working actor for over 20 years. He often reminds my S that as an actor auditioning is his full-time job…that not being chosen for a role is simply a training ground for future roles. For the first-time in seven years and over 20 shows my S did not get the lead in the school play. He had specifically been told by the director and producer this play had been selected for him and the score was being keyed down to accommodate his vocal range. He too was affirmed by all in the room that he nailed his audition…fast forward to the cast list and he was not cast as the lead. I have to say as hard as it was to watch him process the news, I believe it to be the best “training” he has received in preparation for college and his future endeavors. </p>

<p>At his Hartt School audition he was so encouraged and motivated by the late Kevin Gray…he challenged the students to embrace perceived failure, to learn to celebrate it and use it as motivation. Those words made a profound impact on my son - something he wrote down and said he wanted to remember always. They were made even more impactful when the news of Kevin Gray’s death came very shortly after. As he goes from being a big fish in a small pond to a small fish, it seems vital for him to learn to give himself fully to any role regardless of size. I’m sure the days are coming quickly when college begins when he will face the reality of a cast list without his name.</p>

<p>Actsandsings—absolutely stupendous post! My D auditioned for Kevin Gray at the Chicago Unifieds. She felt about him exactly as your S.</p>