Parent Questions for Revisit Day

Prep School Admissions Prep School Parents
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<p>We are very thankful that our child was accepted to a wonderful Hidden Gem school! We will be visiting the school for the first time on revisit day (we weren't able to visit this fall). My child is going there with the assumption "they'll tell me what I need to know," but I want to go with questions. There are a few things I know I am interested to find out, but wanted to ask the parents what questions you would suggest I ask/what I'll need to know. A little background on us - we live in a state far far from the school, and we are receiving, while not full, a very generous amount of financial aid.</p>

<p>(On a side note, if anyone can tell me how their child does flying alone (and will have to make a plane change) I would like to hear. For some reason this is making me more nervous than anything else right now (silly I know), but the idea of my young daughter in an airport alone makes me a nervous wreck!)</p>

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<p>Congratulations on your child’s acceptance! Something that I have found very useful is knowing exactly “who to call about what.” Especially since you will be at a distance, it’s reassuring to know just who you should call when you do have a particular question. Most of my questions surfaced in the first few weeks of school, not at the revisit… Our school has a specific page in the handbook/directory that lists the appropriate people to contact. I hope you have a great time at Revisit Day. </p>

3

<p>The link below is a similar thread, and has many other links</p>

<p><a href=“revisit questions - Prep School Parents - College Confidential Forums”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/888665-revisit-questions.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>The important questions are the ones you think are important. No question is off-limits. Support services for your child, safety, and communication between school and you should be among the top topics with which you have a sense of comfort.</p>

<p>If possible, I would suggest you get contact info for a couple of parents of current students, in case you want to get the “unofficial” answers to some of your question.</p>

<p>Definitely find out about transportation to/from the airport to school. Most schools arrange shuttles for breaks and long week-ends, but not all schools have those arrangements for beginning and end of year.</p>

<p>As for travel on planes, depending on the airline, she may be required to travel as an unaccompanied minor for an additional fee. Airlines’ policy varies (usually until and including age 12 or 14). In this case, an airline representative will be with your child from the moment you hand her off at the airport until the moment she is handed off to the representative of the school at the school’s airport, and vice versa for the return. For children over 12/14, this is optional, and you can choose to use it/not use it based upon the maturity of your child, and how well she can navigate airports, and deal with flight delays, etc. The school may also charge a fee for being an unaccompanied minor. I’ve had no problems in my experience, but that has been with direct flights.</p>

<p>As a side note, depending on where your daughter ends up, and what her long week-end recreational plans are, Amtrak has strict UM rules for those under 16.</p>

<p><a href=“http://www.amtrak.com/unaccompanied-minors-policy”>http://www.amtrak.com/unaccompanied-minors-policy&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Good luck on the revisits.</p>

4

<p>Thanks for the advice, and the links - They are full of great questions! This is all new territory for us, so I just want to make sure there aren’t important questions that just aren’t on my radar.</p>

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<p><em>I apologize as I’m not a parent, but I do have some insight on the traveling thing</em></p>

<p>Sometimes, there are other kids living in the general area or state that you reside in that attend the school. That might be a good thing to try to find out on the visit back days - someone from the school might end up on the same flight as her at some point commuting from home to school, so she wouldn’t be alone for the full time at least. I have friends at boarding school that say that’s happened before, and although it’s not extremely common, it happens.</p>

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<p>Often the kids meet classmates at the airports and it gets very routine. More annoying is the exact time frames the school may designate for when the flights can depart/arrive, which may not match flights to your area. So ask for specific dates and TIMES for flights for next year.</p>

<p>I suggest trying to avoid unaccompanied minor designation. It is expensive and complicated for drop off and pick up, and if any flight is delayed at all along the route your DC will not be allowed to take the first leg. If your child looks fairly mature they can “wing it” with no one the wiser. Since they will be doing this at least 8 times a year they get very good at air travel (start/stop, Thxgiv, winter, spring all X2)</p>

<p>Second the suggestion regarding identifying who to call when you don’t hear from them for weeks, and also a list of items not allowed in dorms (irons, fridges are commonly banned). Pack VERY LIGHTLY and send more if needed. Books and supplies are usually available at the bookstore and they usually prefer the logo stuff. </p>

<p>Check out the what to pack thread. A mattress topper or two for sure!</p>

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<p>If your child will travel long distances, I think I’d opt for a smart phone for her. While traveling, she can send you. texts or emails with updates. Many airlines offer their own apps, which make losing a ticket less likely. </p>

8

<p>When you visit the health center, ask if condoms are readily available to students. At my son’s BS, they keep them in a large bowl in the waiting area.</p>

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<p>I must say, “Where do you keep the condoms?” is one question I’ve yet to hear.</p>

10

<p>Yes, Hastalavista, interesting priorities!</p>

<p>3hclub: you might want to ask a few questions regarding academic support. If it turns out that the pace and/or curriculum is a big step up for your child, it is helpful to know what options they have for help. I say this mostly because kids are often unwilling to admit they need help to the “general public” and your knowing the options could help point them in the right direction.</p>

<p>We also used re-visit day to get excited about the school (we were 99% sure of going) and also to meet a few other families. Someone on this board gave me a terrific piece of advice last year (along the lines of): At revisit, check out the other parents as well… these are the people who raised your child’s potential classmates. </p>

<p>Good luck and congratulations!</p>

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<p>Thanks to everyone for your thoughtful advice, many things to think about - I’ll probably skip the condom question though (you did, however, hastalavista, remind me to pray today - thank you).
It would be wonderful if there was anyone flying with her from school, and while I’d be shocked if anyone was from our airport area, even on the first leg of the flight would be great. She doesn’t have a smart phone and this probably would ease my mind if I was getting messages from her while she’s traveling.
London203, I do have high hopes for revisit day! I watch my child go from “I’m 100% going!” to sheer terror at the idea of living with people she may or may not like and being so far away - depending on the hour of the day (after school she can’t wait to get there, tired at night she’s not so sure this is a great idea after all…) I’m hoping we all feel excited after the visit.
I have really enjoyed reading these boards, and think it’s great how you support one another. Thank you for lending an ear and offering your advice. It’s all very useful to us.</p>

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<p>FYI, on the child flying alone issue:
<a href=“flying as Unaccompanied Minor - Prep School Parents - College Confidential Forums”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1259163-flying-as-unaccompanied-minor.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>While we are at it, the one question that I was thinking about asking on CC but never did, is there generally a policy in BS regarding dating, related acceptable or not acceptable behavior ? And seriously how common is the practice that the school make the condoms so available? </p>

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<p>All schools have a student handbook that spells out the code of conduct. Covered are rules for general conduct, dress code, academic honesty, drugs/alcohol, visitation of opposite-sex dorms, & sexual intimacy. </p>

<p>Many schools make the student handbook available online on their website. </p>

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<p>Why do some schools have condoms in the health center if students are not allowed to have sex?</p>

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<p>Which schools prohibit sex?</p>

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<p>I know Exeter does.</p>

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<p>Believe me, policy doesn’t translate to practice and the schools understand this, thus the condoms and other forms of birth control.</p>

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<p>Thank you @ChoatieMom. I was just confused by that, but I now understand.</p>

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<p>So sex on campus is generally expected in BS for kids older than 16 which I just checked to be the legal age in MA where lots of the BS schools are?</p>