<p>Living on the west coast, I did not have a clue about boarding schools in the east. My son is applying to enter the 10th grade at these schools. He researched these schools, he chose these schools, he applied to these schools...The reason I discovered that he was applying to these schools was because I had to write those parent essays. I just started researching these schools and just finding out how competitive these schools are...
Are the schools worth the trouble and the money?
What type of numbers does take to get in?
My son has always been self-motivated, I'm the parent who is catching up to the child and not the parent who is doing the pushing.
I need some feedback from parents who has kids applying and also with kids attending.
Thank you.</p>
<p>Confused. There seems to be many parents like me viewing for information but not giving any feedback. Looking at some of the threads and suggestions for our kids (although its too late for mine since deadlines are over) to have peer review or teacher review of essays. My child showed me on one of his applications there was an honor signature that there would be no review or editing. My kid was so hardcore about keeping this “code” that it made me laugh, since reading these threads, there are so many parents blatantly suggesting review and editing.
This is one of the reasons why I entered this forum to find out more about this subculture. Majority of you seem to have been preparing to enter your child into BS since , well…you’ve been preparing. Getting your resumes ready…
Some of the classes that your kids are taking in junior high are amazing…Latin, Ethics, Geometry, etc.
Are most schools like this back east? Because, out here in the west coast, it is not.
How do we compete? Are there kids that get into these BS from the west coast?
The more I read, the more I feel like, what have gotten myself into.
And on top of all this, we are an Asian family. Does this make the process more competitive. I see kids applying from Korea, Japan, China, Hong Kong…Are you kidding me.
Realistically, how competitive is the process? What does it take? Oh, did I mention, my kid is only applying to Andover, Exeter, and SPS.
I’m venting a little. I don’t know if there are parents out there whose kids have sped by you and your playing catch up. Somewhere in the backup of your mind you hope they hit a hurdle or a sense of reality. My child has not. The tuition, the distance, the reputation, etc. WORRY!!!
This is why I am asking for feedback from parents with kids in BS who went through this process or are going through this process with a realistic chance for acceptance. Lets be realistic, we all love our kids and want the best for them and want them to succeed and we want to place them in an environment to succeed.
To be frank, I’m not nervous about my child not getting in, I am scared about my child getting in.
Like I mentioned, my child has passed me by. Ranked 1st in class, 99 on ssat, varsity soccer and baseball, concert cellist…
So, I want to know, how likely is this process? To you BS parents, is it worth it? To you west coast parents, is it worth it to send your kid across the country?
Because, if the kid does get in, I’m going to have to sell the house.</p>
<p>@Dad,</p>
<p>For the elite schools you list, int’l kids from well-represented countries (e.g. China/HK & SKorea) are competing against their countrymen for a few spots. Asian-American kids are not in this pool. </p>
<p>Being from CA is probably a neutral geographic hook for east coast schools. Because CA has so darn many people that there are plenty of CA kids in the east coast schools, especially from the Bay Area. It may help your child’s chances if he/she hails from a less represented state.</p>
<p>No, the middle school applicants from the east coast have not been immersed in Latin & quantum physics-- you are reading too much Harry Potter. </p>
<p>The schools on your list are EXTREMELY difficult to get in. Kids w walk-on-water resumes still get passed over for kids with less glowing academic stats, so it’s hard to predict what will happen.</p>
<p>Is it worth it to send your kid across the country? Yes. Across the country is peanuts compared to sending your kid across the world.</p>
<p>The applications are sent in. It is what it is at this point. If you must find something to keep yourself busy until 10-March, start researching second mortgages-- just kidding ;)</p>
<p>Relax</p>
<p>Well I don’t know if it’s worth selling the house but I think it’s worth a lot. I have sent two kids to boarding school; I prefer to keep where they went private. The first go round it was all my son’s idea. I saw the wonderful offerings of boarding school and the low teacher student ratio and knew they could give him so much more than he could get locally.</p>
<p>I wish BS was not so far away but my opinion is as kids reach high school they’re spending less time at home and with their family anyway.</p>
<p>I, and other family members, had to plant the seed in my second child’s mind and carefully nurture it. But I knew she deserved so much more than what she would get at home. (She just didn’t know what she was missing) After just a few months at BS, when asked to compare it to going to the local HS, she said “Perish the thought.”</p>
<p>Fwiw, my children’s applications included SPS and Andover but they were not accepted. However they each got into the perfect school for them and I am highly satisfied. My kids test very well but are not all-around go-getters like your son.</p>
<p>I would not hesitate to send a child to any of the schools you mention. It would be a great honor and a great education, although I think for my kids a so-called lesser school turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I think your son is more typical of the student body of those schools and as organized and motivated as he is, should do well and flourish.</p>
<p>Pardon any typos, I’m on my nexus.</p>
<p>There’s no simple answer to your questions (is there ever??). I live on the west coast and my DD is at SPS. I feel that it’s a great situation for her and I do think all the distance and expense are worth it. It’s not that she wouldn’t have good options at home - she would - but I feel like SPS just eclipses them in terms of the quality of her overall high school experience.</p>
<p>I think a child’s temperament is a huge factor in whether or not a far-away BS is a good decision. Some kids are the type where the advantages of BS will outweigh the disadvantages, and my DD is one of them. Based on the fact that your son has taken such initiative I would guess that he’s also akid who would get the most he can out of the experience.</p>
<p>For better or for worse he has applied to 3 very selective schools without anything that would be more of a “sure bet” for admissions. You sound cognizant of that and I expect that he is as well. Did you do the financial aid forms? If you qualify, they won’t expect you to seel your house, so you can cross that one off the list at list.</p>
<p>Feel free to PM me if you want.</p>
<p>Dadwoclue: Seeing that you’ve posted a similar topic in various places with little to no response, I have a word of advice: Chill.</p>
<p>While I know that it’s frustrating to see dozens, even hundreds of people viewing your post with no comments/replies…rest assured that eventually someone generally does take the time to reply and answer questions.</p>
<p>That said, you have posted a zillion questions, and it will take even the most dedicated CC BS Forum poster a while to address them all.</p>
<p>Since I have to meet my family somewhere for dinner soon, I will address just one “Are the schools worth the trouble and the money?”</p>
<p>There was a heated thread recently about this very topic…looks like the moderators removed it already. But the answer is the always unsatisfying “It depends.” </p>
<p>For our family, we feel the sacrifices we’ve made to send our older daughter to her BS (she chose St. Andrew’s in Delaware over St. Paul’s two app cycles ago) HAVE been worth the money and trouble. </p>
<p>You sound like you have a smart, well rounded kid. The kind of kid who will do well no matter where he goes to HS (or college, for that matter).</p>
<p>However, keep in mind that hundreds of kids who are applying will have similar “stats”. And only a fraction of them get admitted. Since you’ve disclosed your race, I’ll add that Asians represent an ORM (over-represented minority) when it comes to BS admission…so the likelihood is even lower. That is not to say that your son won’t get in…just that, in my opinion, many prospective parents grossly underestimate the odds of admission to the most selective schools (which include the ones your son has applied to).</p>
<p>As a bit of a side note, it’s not actually true that hundreds of applicants to those schools have those stats. If about 60,000 kids take the SSAT, only the top 600 score in the 99th. If the top 1.499% are assigned to the 99th percentile, then about 900 kids score in the 99th. About 450 of those are boys, and I’m guessing 150 are 8th-grade boys. Realistically, the majority of those 150 do not apply to expensive and distant boarding schools.</p>
<p>@Brother,</p>
<p>Schools are NOT going to be splitting hairs between SSAT scores in the high-90’s. And since the SSAT is favored over the ISEE for boarding school admissions, there probably are hundred of kids out there w top SSAT scores who are indeed applying to expensive boarding schools.</p>
<p>@Dadwoclue,</p>
<p>FYI, my S had high stats like your S’s, but he still did not get admitted to every school he applied to. It’s a dark art how these admissions people pick kids…</p>
<p>No one has mentioned and I don’t have time to do detailed analysis, but at most schools if you are NOT requesting financial aid you actually have a better chance. I believe Andover is truly need-blind, meaning the FA situation has no bearing on admission decision.</p>
<p>@Dadwoclue, you say you came late to the admissions process… just in time to do your parent essays. Did you have time to do the FA application as well? You might only have to rent the guest bedroom, not sell the whole house ;)</p>
<p>Also, your son with great stats… did he interview with the schools (by Skype, perhaps, or an alumni rep or???). Most, though not all, schools require an interview. I’ll assume he did not travel alone to the east coast without your knowledge or permission.</p>
<p>As for is it worth it, I’ll second 7Dad’s “it depends.” There are a couple of current threads running on this subject, and the thread titles will give you at least a little hint. For our part, the financial sacrifice is absolutely worth it. Many on these boards will agree. A few will not. YMMV</p>
<p>Also, be aware that you cannot apply for FA after decisions are made. So if you think you qualify, call the schools tomorrow, explain your son driving the process, and ask if you can still get the documents in. They may give you only a few days to do so, but if you cannot afford to send him without it, you need to either apply NOW or pull his applications. At SPS and Exeter, the need for FA could be the difference between admitted and waitlisted. Even with Andover, you still need to have that FA application on file.</p>
<p>Neato makes a good point. Most schools’ FA app cutoffs are between 1/31 and 2/15. If you don’t have your taxes done, you send last year’s, provide a “best guess” for this year, give permission to view filed taxes, and upload this year’s (2012, that is) as soon as they are in. Almost every, if not every, school uses the SSS by NAIS and you only need to get your info together once, then list the schools you want the info sent to. But get 'er done if you haven’t already…</p>
<p>I would like to thank everyone for all your insight. As a parent I was looking for some reassurances? Some of you should realize that the view is very different from the mountain top looking down than it is from the bottom looking up. What is the deal with this over represented minority? Why not just the most qualified? Is that opening a pandoras box?
I just wanted a feel for what my child’s chances are and i guess I’ll just have to wait. But, again thank you to all you parents. Wow, what all you must go through. I better get in the game. I better go talk to my kid. His done everything alone and has done everything well. I’m proud of him and ashamed of myself with all the parents like you out there. I was clueless.</p>
<p>Dadwoclue, you can be proud of both your son and yourself. It is impressive that you nurtured a kid who in 9th grade managed the prep school app process from start to finish entirely on his own. Perhaps you should be sharing your secrets with us!</p>
<p>The driving factor concerning over-represented minorities and under-represented minorities is that diversity is valued. In the old days, prep schools were all upper class white students–mostly boys too. Efforts have been made to make the school population be more varied. It appears that if ethnicity were not taken into account, schools would be predominately Asian now. I am sorry when it impinges upon an individual’s chances but at the same time, diversity is one of the reasons I have sent my children to BS from our mostly lily-white state.</p>
<p>Oh and yes, I was thinking myself, that you should really be discussing this with your son. Ask him why he wants to go to BS and what has attracted him to each school, ask about his interviews, etc. If he gets accepted he won’t be around much after September, so make the most of your remaining time.</p>
<p>Neither of my kids could have possibly negotiated the application process on their own!</p>
<p>Dadwoclue, if you want hand-wringing company, there’s a great “Worry” thread… it should be pretty high up the lists, still. It has been a comfort to many…</p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1453920-worry-thread-parents-only-please-kids-can-worry-chances-forum.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1453920-worry-thread-parents-only-please-kids-can-worry-chances-forum.html</a></p>
<p>Dadwoclue,</p>
<p>It occurred to me that unless you explicitly stated so in your parent essays, you may also want to somehow let the schools know that you support your son’s application. While his independence is certainly a quality schools look for, they also want to know that the parents are committed as well. Sometimes, kids apply without their parents’ blessing or support. You don’t want the schools to get the wrong idea. </p>
<p>By the way, your son sounds like I was in high school. I remember my mother asking where I was when I came home from taking the SAT. She thought I had been sleeping over at a friend’s house and was more than a little upset. I had decided that I had had enough of high school and was ready for college. A few months later, I told her where I was enrolling and not to worry, I had secured a scholarship. Hopefully, your son does a better job of keeping you in the loop than I did my mother! She did a lot of head scratching when I was a teen. Be proud that you have raised a smart kid who knows how to take control of his own future. He will do well regardless of the outcome on March 10.</p>
<p>Dadwoclue:
you did give us a good picture of your son, also your current situation. Your son definitely is a top candidate (not guaranteed a ticket to get in though, since there are too many of them comparing to the openning slots), and he will definitely do well there if he gets in. You only need to worry about the bill, not him.</p>