Interesting @gouf. Dilaudid caused vomiting for me but morphine can also cause nausea. Hospice previously had dilaudid in the kit so I may ask.
Did your Tinnitus ever go away? DH has had Tinnitus, which is still present but not as loud/annoying. Never figured out what triggered it and ENT MD said no solution - just hope it goes away.
My H finds his tinnitus is less annoying when he reduces his caffeine intake. My BIL uses hearing aids to help mute the tinnitus by providing āwhite noiseā I believeāthat is a known approach. Have not heard of anyone making it go away, sadly.
No, it never went away. I saw an audiologist but she said thereās nothing that can be done. Itās discouraging. Sometimes at night I listen to recordings of crickets to mask the sound. The frequency of the crickets is about the same as the ringing in my ears, do it helps.
I have tinnitus too. My brain forgets about it until I read a post on CC about tinnitus 
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Yeah, I go long stretches without thinking about it, but then it will bother me suddenly. I miss the silence.
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Checking in. Howās it going @compmom and others?
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@momoffour that is so thoughtful. I would also like to hear how others are doing.
My mother has been in bed for 6 weeks, on hospice, eating little and is very confused about where she is. I took photos of the downstairs and garden in her facility and of her friends but she thinks the photos are of that āother place>ā
She constantly wants to leave and perserverates all afternoon and we have tried various drugs. Hospice wants her to try daily trazadone with lunch. It is a low dose. So far it is not helping her agitation but is increasing her confusion. Yesterday she asked what kind of car she should buy. I said āblue.ā
Her anemia is probably terrible and she may have breathing issues soon. It is a big decision not to send her to hospital for transfusion or infusions but they did not really ijmpact her misery.
How are you and how is everyone doing?
Hugs to you @compmom , I am sorry the dance of a thousand medicines is not getting better results for your Mom. You sound super diligent in your advocacy; remember to take care of yourself, too.
My Dad had his long delayed cataract surgery and that went fine. My mom called me early that morning (realllllllly early), disconnected, I called back to calm her down and try to get a coherent sentence out of her. Turns out she had butt dialed me, and was distraught for ābothering meā at work. But then all the other worries trickled out, and I coached her again to repeat āIām okay. Iām okay. Iām doing the best I canā.
His demeanor is not improving but his leg strength is a bit better, heās walking more. Local sibling will be on vacation for nearly a month, preferred sibling is back today from theirs. We are in a rare steady holding pattern until doctoring starts up again in late August.
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Third day on trazadone yesterday and I manipulated her into a wheelchair and wheeled her down the hall in her nightie. Big step after 6 weeks and was dizzy and nauseous.
Fourth day- after I wrote that post- and after a lot of conversation, she allowed me to dress her (big deal) and help her into wheelchair and I got her in the elevator. From there so many greetings of welcome and surprise. She sat outside with friends and went to the pub for her gin (me wheeling her). Unbelievable! She may pay for this tomorrow but it is downright miraculous. after SIX weeks of not leaving her bed.
I told her yesterday that pride was her problem and that if she agreed to wheelchair her quality of life would be better than being bed bound but she doesnāt retain anything. So it must be the drug. The drug confuses her but on the other handā¦
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You are the prototype of best family interaction. So happy that your mom got another good day.
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@compmom, what a journey!
@greenbutton, I always chuckle at the sibling descriptions.
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Agreed. It is striking that doctors donāt talk to each other and some even resist hearing from others when I try to get them to talk with each other (especially if one is asserting he has done something that the other asserts never works).
My BIL is a specialized surgeon (and one of the better ones in his city ā he was recruited to move to the city). When my mother or brother have needed medical care, they go to colleagues he knows and respects and they end up calling him to explain what they found and go into a lot more detail than a patient would ever get. It enables much better decision-making.
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Our PCP took a position with a University, and our current PCP is doing well with us - he originally was a researcher, then had a single office before joining the group (4 MDs and a NP). Since I had worked for a specialty group (administrator and CFO) I knew a lot of the specialists and our original PCP was networked in with āthe bestā (his dad had also been a local MD).
Once I had the stage III cancer (13 years ago) I had kept a ātime lineā - lined notebook paper had a line for each date and brief description of medical procedure. Color highlighted various things; indicated start and stop of various drugs etc.
When I see PCP, I can āsummarizeā things w/o him searching through my paper chart. He provides quite a lot of medical input in his thinking on various tests - and various declining situations in the last 9 months ā although all the drugs/radiation to keep me alive from cancer has lead to issues now. So be it.
DHās medical care has gotten more involved, and I started a time line with him this year, with a prior summary leading in.
Have a current list of medications paper clipped to time line. Have a summary for each of us on immunizations.
I get copies of lab, various reports (Radiology report from CT scans etc.). Some of the doctors have electronic medical records where we can get summaries, but our cardiology office doesnāt put everything there so I get a copy on exit from visit. I have a canvas bag for DH and a canvas bag for me. Kept a copy of a very detailed dates/surgical procedures and all the other things one needs to fill out for new patient with specialists.
I asked at the urology office for two different test copies at the end of my appointment when finished in exam room, and when I got in the waiting area - had only got one from the gal - so I backtracked āpatients are not allowed in this hallwayā - so I showed her that she only gave me one test copy and missed the second one. āStrike while the iron is hotā. They may ālikeā doing things a certain way, but I didnāt want to endlessly wait due to her error.
We usually get excellent info from pharmacist on duty, but can always ask DHās brother who continues to work as a pharmacist.
It has given my mom immense reassurance to know my siblings and I can open both our parentsā virtual portals with their main healthcare providers. How the elderly without advocates manage, I do not know. Their doctors have been very gracious in answering questions and sharing information when we ask for it ā but we do have to ask. Thereās a whole generation of people who donāt want to bother doctors with questions.
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Thereās also a whole generation of doctors who donāt want to be bothered by questions.
Iām with you. Being able to manage care through a portal is great but I have no idea how the elderly get care at all without someone helping them.
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At least once a week my fairly recently widowed mom asks how people like her manage if they donāt have someone like me to help them. And Iām not even very good at most stuff and Iām impatient and a procrastinator to boot. But I donāt think sheād be able to function alone. And sheās relatively savvy with a computer for someone in their late 80s but itās all simple stuff - email, Facebook, ordering from amazon, etc. There are lots of people without even that level of computer usage or without access.
Yup, my folks havenāt been able to manage the computer well and never did any online health. It is very useful to have telehealth visits instead of in person as the frail elderly and challenging to transport and no one wants germs when they visit.
When H had a milestone bday party, he ended up having to call many of his friends because they didnāt look at email much and missed his emailed invitation. 20 people showed up out of the 30+ invited tho, so he was happy. Not sure how techie his late 70, early 80yesr old friends are.
Can I vent?
My dad had a cardioversion procedure done today. The results were immediately successful. Heart rate went from 160 to 75.
My parentās have a twice a week part time health aide and she drove them to the hospital and back home, and arranged for another worker to come in until bedtime. But after that itās just him and my 89 yo mom.
Heās been fine with a walker at night but nobody got through to them how weak he would be after general anesthesia. āYou can go home ā is what patients want to hear.
Praying this wonāt result in a fall
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Could you hire short term homecare workers?