<p>This is college decision times, and there are so many factors coming into play. For all the considerations, do you simply look at which colleges are really good for your son/daughter, or do you try to find out a best "value" for your money? In other words, if college A is a better fit than college B, but the former costs you $10000 extra a year (assuming you can afford it), do you think twice whether the better fit is worth the extra money? </p>
<p>I'm admitted to a state u and a pricy liberal arts. While my parents promised to support my decision whichever I choose to go, I'm kind of concious of huge price differences, and somehow feel uncomfortable asking parents for such a large sum of hard-earned cash... On the other hand, I have no way to pay up myself and not qualified to receive any aids due to the family income..</p>
<p>I think this has more to do with you than them. Either you feel comfortable asking them to essentially give you a lot more money or you don’t. Take some time to figure out which it is.</p>
<p>Suppose for a minute that you parents said if you go to the cheaper school, they will give you $10,000 cash each year for whatever you wanted. Would it change your mind?</p>
<p>There would have to be a big reason why one school was worth the big money - specific specialized program, guarantee onto a graduate program, etc. Otherwise I don’t think I could ask for the difference and I know I don’t think I’d try and pay for it for one of my kids. If it was though a specific program that completely matched their talents and interests and we could swing it, I might but as yet none of my kids have such specific dreams.</p>
<p>There are many points of view articulated on this forum concerning cost. My sense is that those parents who can afford the best college for their children rarely post an opinion regarding cost on this subject. So there is a definite bias toward being frugal.</p>
<p>I’m of the school that if even with a stretch and a possible loan you can afford the better college, then it’s worth it. High quality education is priceless when it makes a difference.</p>
<p>But if the college is not the better choice academically, especially if the comparison is between 2 mid-tier colleges then my sense is that the stretch and possible loan are rarely worth it.</p>
<p>If your parents can afford it without going into debt, and are willing to pay, go for the fit. And when the time comes, let your children make this choice as well.</p>
<p>Please have this discussion with your parents instead of with us. Will they feel the exta money is something they will bring up later ("We’re paying $55,000 per year, and you …fill in the blanks about grades or whatever) In our family that becomes a problem. We “can” pay the extra, but we are giving up other choices to do it (vacations, retirement dates, etc.) Then if the kid doesn’t do as well as the parent expects, how does the family respond? Continue to pay for a 2.0 GPA? Yank the kid out if the GPA is too low? Pay big bucks for a degree in Computer Science but refuse to fund an expensive degree in Fine Arts?
Have these talks now with your parents.</p>
<p>“do you put a price for a good education?”…</p>
<p>For us, the price of a good education is priceless. But I do not speak for all parents at all and many feel differently and that is their right. You have to find out how YOUR parents feel. We wanted our kids to go to the best fit college and if they earned the admission, we were willing to find a way to fund it. Yes, it IS worth it to us. While you can get a good education at most colleges, we felt they should go to the best college that fit them, even if other colleges were cheaper. We are willing to go into debt to fund it. I realize many may not agree. We let our kids pick where to go. They have graduated and I have to say, they had wonderful experiences and picked schools that were perfect for them. For us, that was priceless (even if we’ll be funding it for years to come). We feel they did all they could do to get into these schools (and did very well at the schools to make the most of their education) and so we wanted to do everything we could to make this happen for them. Paying for the right fit was important to us. Again, you have to ask your parents if they value the right fit over the cheapest price. If they are willing to do so (which sounds like they ARE), thank them and grab this opportunity and show them you’ll make the most of it. They will be happy (even if poorer).</p>
<p>3 years ago our D said she would go to the less expensive U. if we wanted her to, but she really loved the more expensive university. We felt that loving the school would take her a long way, and it has. </p>
<p>We are definitely feeling the financial pinch, and it will be worse now that our S (an HS senior) is deciding between one “okay” U. with a fabulous financial package and one “fabulous” U. with an okay financial package (similar situation as yourself, I think). The “fabulous” U. will hurt our hopes for retirement comfort. And the previously mentioned D is now looking at a masters program and med school. </p>
<p>The issue we parents face is that there is a limit on the earning clock for us, and having enough for retirement is very important when you just can’t work anymore or your employment opportunities are limited due to your age (this is a reality that we might not be able to find a job with all these universities cranking out grads!). </p>
<p>The other issue is that perspective changes vastly for folks between the ages of 17 and 22. It is common to change majors and even schools. What seems terribly important now may be quickly forgotten. </p>
<p>That said, please don’t be afraid to ask your parents for the money if you feel strongly about the expensive school. Tell them you feel uncomfortable. Determine how important the expensive school really is to you and why. Try to figure out if you think that will be important in the long run. </p>
<p>One note: we have found that private universities, even large ones, offer much more support and flexibility to help a student reach their goals in 4 years. They also seem to have better advising. State schools are quite rigid, and here in California, it is common for students to require an extra year to graduate.</p>