<p>I am so excited for you all! I was in your shoes last year . . . first waiting on acceptances, then waiting on financial aid . . . and then just waiting for my daughter to take that big step and move thousands of miles away. You're probably worried about hundreds of things right now, and I wish I could tell you that will change, but it won't. My advice is to not get too caught up in the worrying . . . take time to enjoy your kid. There will be plenty more time to worry when the house is empty!</p>
<p>Don't worry about embarrassing your kid at drop-off . . . you probably will but so will everyone else's parents! Don't worry about whether he or she will eat, make friends, do homework, go to class, make good grades, call or text you . . . because it's out of your control. You've done your job and your hard work helped your kid get to this point. Do be alert to signs from your child that any of these things are not happening. </p>
<p>It won't be easy. When I put my D on the plane last August, I cried for days. Had to take a vacation just to pull myself together! When I put her on the plane in January, I was able to go straight from the airport to the office. I still miss her so badly sometimes that I can't breathe. I am lucky that mine is very communicative, but that is the product of many years of being willing to listen and advise, but let her make her own decisions. Lay the groundwork now!!!!</p>
<p>Here are just a few things I think are imperative for your kid going off to college:
Make sure he or she understands the dangers of alcohol poisoning (not a drink here or there but binge drinking and pass-out drunkness). Too many kids are lost each year, including several recently. </p>
<p>Make SURE your child understands that alcohol is the Number 1 date rape drug. I work with sexual assault survivors and my poor daughter has been hearing the speech for years now about not letting anyone bring her a drink and not leaving her drink unattended. And that goes for soda and water, too! And it goes without saying, but boys can be victimized and need to follow the same precautions.</p>
<p>Give your kid some very simple rules about when to go to the health center - as most have never made that decision on their own - and encourage them to call home if they have any health concerns - fever (yes send a thermometer), extreme, unremitting headaches, uncontrolled nausea/vomiting, dizziness/passing out, and most of all, depression. Please talk to your child about how normal it can be to get overwhelmed. Most colleges have mental health services and the important thing is to make sure your kid knows it is OK to ask for help. I can tell you that over the course of this year my child has utilized her U's mental health services, Emergency Room, Health Center (several times) and has also been referred to two medical specialists outside the University's system. Every time, she called me first and I had to push for her to go get help.....because she was "too busy." </p>
<p>Start a pattern of communication that works for you and your child. Whether it's a weekly skype or phone call, daily texts.....something that is not burdensome to him or her but eases your mind. Make it clear that if you send a text, you expect an answer before your child goes to bed that night, no matter how late. Make appointments for calls and let them set the time. At first you may need daily texts and let them know that you NEED that now but will probably not need as much contact later on. </p>
<p>I am sure other veteran parents on CC have other things that they believe are the most important and encourage them to add on to this thread. Mine are health and well-being based because my daughter is a great student and doesn't need much from me in that area. That doesn't mean we have not had lots of long calls about school-related issues. She whines, I get the cheese, and I think she feels better after having a sounding board who is 100% on her side.</p>
<p>Again, welcome to this brave new world and good luck to you and your child!</p>