Parents pushing to go to cheaper school

Paying for College
1

<p>Im not sure if this is in the correct forum but anyway,</p>

<p>I have received about an 87% scholarship (athletic) to my 2nd favorite school as of now however its academic, and athletic program isn't EXACTLY the program i want however if i went there it would be sufficient. The school that i think will be a better fit in because it has my exact intended major and is known for it along with being athletically much larger and in a more competitive conference with a better coach is more expensive by a good amount (i was offered an athletic scholarship of a little more than half of the tuition approximately). My parents are almost at this point forcing me to go to the cheaper school without even getting to go to the other school. I dont think this should be something that you can bargain hunt with personally because my whole life hinges off of 1 choice and its needs to be the right one. What do you guys think i should tell them? I am a person that likes to wait and think a lot before i do anything yet the school giving me the scholarship needs the decision by tomorrow unless i request a little more time. Im really stressed and in a bind. Im not sure if i can even get out to Chicago to see the school i think is the best...Any advice would be great, i jsut want to hear what other people would do.</p>

2

<p>I think you should either listen to your parents or find a way to make up the extra yourself. Perhaps you can take out more loans?</p>

<p>Your "entire life" doesn't depend on what college you get into. Seriously. The time it matters the most is when you get your first job. But after that people look at your work performance and what your previous employers say, not your college or your grades.</p>

3

<p>I thought May 1 was the near-universal date for school acceptance decisions. Did you apply ED?</p>

4

<p>"I am a person that likes to wait and think a lot before i do anything" Ask the school for a bit more time. Tell the school that you have other offers on the table, and that you want to be certain that you are making the best choice. Make sure that they understand that they are one of your top choices. Try to find out how much of your scholarship is dependent on you continuing to participate in your sport. If you are sidelined with an injury, what happens with your college education? Will you suddenly be stuck with paying a huge out-of-state tution?</p>

<p>Then, sit your parents down and talk about the money. LISTEN TO THEM. The simple truth may well be that the cheap place with the big scholarship is the only way that your family can afford a college education for you. Most students end up loving the college/university that they attend even if it originally was the very bottom of their list, or was the only affordable option.</p>

<p>"my whole life hinges off of 1 choice and its needs to be the right one." How competitive are you in this sport? Is there a possibility that you can become a professional and so need to attend the right school so that you can be in the best position after your undergraduate eligibility runs out? Are you a possible Olympic/International level contender? If not, then stop worrying that your "whole life hinges off 1 choice". There are many, many, many paths to a happy, useful, and productive life. It is extremely rare for a person to have only one possible good option. Most of us have multiple decent options, and end up changing our college majors, and eventually even changing our professional career fields. Please have confidence that your future is bigger and brighter than it looks right now.</p>

<p>Wishing you all the best.</p>

5

<p>
[quote]
because my whole life hinges off of 1 choice and its needs to be the right one.

[/quote]

No, it doesn't. In these situations, there is rarely a "right" or "wrong" decision. *Every*school has its pluses and minuses. No school is perfect in all things. (And your "whole life" doesn't hinge on this decision anyway; you'll have many more serious decisions to make in your lifetime.)</p>

<p>One of the factors in making this decision, however, is cost. If your parents are paying for college, they have the right to say, "This is how much we want to pay." They can even make it contingent - "This school costs $X to us, given your scholarship; that school costs $X+Y. We don't think that school is worth $X+Y, so we're only paying $X."</p>

<p>My parents also made my college decision contingent on the amount of money I got; I went to the one that gave me the most money. It wasn't my first choice. I did more than survive it. And I've changed careers three times so far.</p>

<p>You liked School #2 enough to apply to it; you'll likely be happy there. And if you're not, you can revisit the situation through transfer applications.</p>

6

<p>another thing that you must consider is if you are not playing your sport due to injuries, academics, or you are just tired of playing, would this school still be a financially feasible option for your family? Balancing a sport and your academics in college is way different than balancing a sport and academics in high school. Depending on your sport there are road trips, hours of practice time.</p>

<p>This really is going to tkae some thought. Especially in these hard economic times, if your parents tell you that they can only pay or are only willing to pay "X" amount of $$'s, believe it. The money is not going to magically appear.</p>

<p>I agree with the others; live on a few more days and you will see this is a long way from being a decision where your whole life hinges on this one choice.</p>

7

<p>Listen to your parents if you want their help.</p>

8

<p>Well i agree that my WHOLE life doesnt hinge off this one decision but many things do. So athletically it is not a sport where you can go on later to get paid to do it however if good enough Olympics are an option which is why im leaning towards the more expensive school. I am more than willing to take out a student loan and pay it off after school when i have started a job however my parents seem to not even remember that that is an option. I have seen people much much worse off than us go to very expensive schools so to me i feels like my parents are cheaping out even though i know that isn't really the case.</p>

<p>And somebody asked if i get injured or something do i lose the athletic scholarship...that is a no on that. I get the total scholarship every year i compete there even if i do poorly, am injured, or hate it.</p>

9

<p>^^those families "much much worse off" probably got more financial aid than your family is receiving. Loans aren't as easy to obtain anymore, and jobs are harder to come by. I'd think really long and hard before I'd take out a loan.</p>

10

<p>Defender0802, if you are willing to cover the rest in loans, I think you need to get more serious about it. No such decisions regarding taking out loans should be made without a lot of research and forethought. </p>

<p>Figure out exactly how much you'll need, the interest rate you can secure (if any), what kind of payments you will have to make and how long it will take you to pay it back. Also calculate how much that loan will cost you over its lifetime (e.g. $50k take out this year could cost you $150,000 by the time you are done). </p>

<p>Then factor in your likely future salary, how much it costs to realistically live independently (e.g. where will you live, how much is a house or an apartment to rent or buy, how much do you spend on food every month, will you travel, how much are utilities etc. etc.). And what are the chances you may not be employed (or fully employed for your chosen career) upon graduation? What will happen then? </p>

<p>This is not easy information to obtain, and it will take a lot of work on your part, but you can't make a commitment to such a decision without them. </p>

<p>You may learn from the above facts that it is not realistic, or doable. You may learn how much this will financially impact you, and what you could use that same money for (e.g. grad school, a downpayment on a house, work overseas for several years as a volunteer), it is not worth it to you. </p>

<p>Or you may, armed with the real facts, decide it is realistic, not risky, and very much worth it to you. You will then have serious information to present to your parents to show you have made an informed decision. And that you are so serious and committed about going to school, that you did this work.</p>

<p>It's easier to say don't worry, I'll pick it up up the tab, and quite another for you to do the homework and see the actual facts of what you are saying, and show your parents your have made a <em>well informed choice and commitment</em> to this direction.This is why your parents might not be 'hearing' you right now.</p>

11

<p>I see where you guys are coming from. I think i will sit down with my mom and go over what loans i could have available to take out and what will be the cost to pay them off after school as well as what the job outlook, salary, locations and things like that for my intended career more in the coming weeks.</p>

12

<p>If your parents can arrange a college education for you, with out loans; this is a very generous gift that can't be ignored.</p>

<p>You are getting there - sit down with your mom and crunch numbers. Plan for worst case scenarios. You will be a lot happier 5-6 years down the road when you aren't driving a 10 year old car, living in your mom's basement.</p>

13

<p>I want to add a point about taking out loans: It is no longer a given that students can get alternative loans. Stafford loans are capped by year in school. You cannot borrow more than $5500 total subsidized & unsubsidized Stafford loans as a freshman (6500 sophomore, 7500 junior/senior). That's IT. If your school does not offer additional loan options (such as Perkins), and most do not, then you would have to take out an alternative loan. The current credit crisis has resulted in MANY students being denied alternative loans. So you might be willing to borrow $10,000 a year ... but you might not be able to do so.</p>

14

<p>loans are scary to pay off..my brother has loans that basically means he's paying the amount for a house, w/o a house. that's frightening.. however, it is your favorite school. but remember, you ultimately can be sucessfull at any school, just as long as you develop good skills that lead to sucess. </p>

<p>good luck, talk it out with the folks, and understand exactly what those loans mean and if the price tag of a more expensive school is worth it.</p>

15

<p>Even at a state school with 87% scholarship, college expenses can strain the family budget. The economy is scary and your parents may have lost a big chunk of their savings and retirement this past year. Try to get through school without any loans. Once you make a chart with your potential salary, the average cost of a car, apartment, food, insurance, etc., you will see how much of a burden loan payments can be. Now, if that is the ONLY way to get an education, then people do what they have to do, but I would avoid debt if at all possible. Plus, the amount of money you can borrow is limited so your parents would likely have to co-sign/guarantee your payments (effectively making it their debt) if you borrow beyond those limits. Keep in mind that if you compete at the college level, it will probably be impossible to work at all while in college.
Think twice about the more competitive athletic school- sometimes it can be nice to be the star in a lesser program than the guy on the bottom at a more competitive program. The guys at the top always get more individual coaching and perks (even though perks are supposedly illegal per the NCAA) than the guys at the bottom. Whatever you do, pick a school you would like even if you never play a minute of your sport. Pick a school where you are comfortable outside of the athletic department and can make friends outside of your team.</p>

16

<p>the sport to which you refer should be secondary, esp if it ends with potential Olympic dreams. If you were Michael Phelps, they would give you a full ride. Focus on your academics, not your sport.</p>

<p>And go to the cheaper school but do not refer to it as the cheaper school, of course. Why you think it is acceptable to borrow money baffles me. </p>

<p>I am sorry to be harsh, but really, life is expensive. Paying back those loans will be a huge burden. Huge.</p>

17

<p>This is a personal and family issue. It is your parents' decision as to how much they want to pay towards your college. If you want to go somewhere that costs more, you are going to have to make up the difference. Find out what they will pay, and see if you can come up with the money by working, borrowing and negotiating with your preferred college.</p>

<p>We had a similar situation with our son. I so want him and all of my kids to go where they want. However, the financial and family situation is such where it just isn't wise for us to pay more than a certain amount, as much as we would love to do so. We did work out a scenario where we are borrowing, he is borrowing, he is working, and the school threw in some extra money. He also got an outside scholarship. Since he is on merit scholarship at the school, it did not reduce the school money. It's still tight, and sometimes I find myself wishing he had picked some of the less expensive options. The only reason it is possible for him to go where he is even with the multi sources of payment is because his brother did go to a state school instead of private options that we would have paid at that time because we were able to do so then. Things have changed now and we are not able to do as much. </p>

<p>Also,it is very difficult paying back those loans. Take it from someone who just finished paying back school loans before starting to pay for preschool for her first child. I am going to be well in my 70's before I am finished paying for school as I expect I will have to borrow for my last child who still in elementary school. My oldest really has it so much easier as he has NO school loans. Regardless of monetary issues, that is one thing he does not have on his plate. It's tough enough even in that situation. If he had a several hundred dollar a month loan repayment, the paperwork, budgeting would even be more problematic. It's tight for him as it is, as we can't help him financially anymore unlike many of his peers. My second one will also be loan free which will be very helpful as he is in the performing arts, a field where income is very uncertain. We will help him a bit with health insurance and whatever we can, as he cost us the least in terms of college expenses going to the state school and getting a grant. The third one will have some loans, but he is working now to keep that amount as low as he can.</p>