Parents teaching kid a lesson about money...

<p>So, I am considering some pretty selective private colleges that are about 45 grand a year. Chances for merit scholarship = 0. I told my parents that if they weren't willing to pay, that was ok, because I'd take out loans...and they said they wouldn't let me put myself into a lot of debt.</p>

<p>But I don't know, it's a little frustrating, because I don't want to waste time on an application to a school my parents won't allow me to attend. Whenever I bring this up, they get really mad and tell me to apply to any school, and "we'll see what happens".</p>

<p>Do any of you as parents do this? Is this code for "I'll really pay" or code for "we want you to keep your dream school in mind so you won't slack off"? I'm thinking it's the latter, and it's ****ing me off. They are telling me they will only pay for my state school...and are refusing to say what else is in their budget.</p>

<p>How can I get them to have a frank conversation about this? I don't want my only choice to be the state uni at the end of the day.</p>

<p>Perhaps you can get your GC to intervene, and talk with you and your parents about the financial aspects.</p>

<p>You also could show parents some figures on how much college costs.</p>

<p>In addition, you could let them know that you may qualify for need-based aid (Depending on the college and family's finances, even families making 6 figure incomes may qualify for need-based aid), and to find out whether you do, they'll need to fill out certain forms based on their taxes. They'll need to do those forms by about Feb. Show the info to your parents and see if they'll do the forms.</p>

<p>Also have your parents use the financial aid estimator on CC's home page.</p>

<p>Depending on your grades and scores, you may affordable options in addition to your state U. You may, for instance, qualify for merit aid at some private colleges.</p>

<p>Depending on your grades and scores and what your parents are willing to pay, there's a chance that state U may be too expensive for you.</p>

<p>You also need to learn everything you can about merit aid and financial aid. There are some excellent books and web sites on those subjects. CC's financial aid board and the thread on merit aid and other scholarships on the Parents Forum also have valuable info.</p>

<p>If your parents really will not tell you what they're willing to pay, you need to apply in ways that will allow you to go to college no matter what your parents decide to do.</p>

<p>And, no, I have not treated my kids the way your parents are. I gave them dollar amounts that I was willing to pay.</p>

<p>I notice that you're planning on applying to the below schools. That's not a good list if $ is a concern. There are a lot of out of state publics which means you'd be paying much higher rates than you'd probably be paying if you went to your in-state public.</p>

<p>You also don't seem to be applying to private schools with extremely generous merit aid. From what I skimmed in your back posts, I think you're male. If you are, you probably would have a good chance for merit aid at liberal arts colleges that are generous with merit aid. That's particularly true of LACs like Goucher that used to be women's colleges.</p>

<p>syracuse university
university of southern california
university of maryland, college park
university of texas, austin
university of north carolina, chapel hill
northwestern university
university of california, los angeles
univeristy of california, berkeley</p>

<p>i noticed you said your parents said they'd pay for in state public, but then later you said they wouldn't tell you how much they were going to pay.</p>

<p>Seems like you do have some guidance from your parents on their planned contribution: as much as it would cost you to go to your in state public school. Or am I misunderstanding your post?</p>

<p>Are they planning on filling out the FAFSA and the CSS Profile and any other required aid forms?</p>

<p>take out as little loans as possible--this is what is wrong with college students these days, they don't even realize the massive amount of debt they will be digging themselves into until they realize how freakin hard it is to pay off. 45 grand a year? I think that is ludacris. And I'm not a parent, just a student..but do you realize if you went into such massive debt, it will take you even longer to accomplish other great things in life, like getting married, buying your first house, and having children? Go to the state school, and don't get so caught up with this discussion board with all these people focused on getting into the top schools, which also have a top budget. Are you really willing to take out nearly 200 grand in loans for just four years of your life--in the long run, the time you are in college is sooooo short, so don't end up paying for it the rest of your lonnnnng life!</p>