<p>Okay I am in really, really big trouble and I deserve it. </p>
<p>I didn't turn in my English project the day it was due or even the day after it was due. This is all of course due to abysmal time management on my part. I am sure I could have done well but my highest possible grade is now a B-, assuming he deducts 10% for each school day late, or 0% if he deducts 10% for each actual day late. </p>
<p>Or does anyone have any ideas for study skills and getting motivated and all that...I would really love to change</p>
<p>(can't edit this post after 20 min., so here is the rest. If a moderator would like to replace the above with this, that would be great, thanks!)</p>
<p>Okay I am in really, really big trouble and I deserve it. </p>
<p>I didn't turn in my English project the day it was due or even the day after it was due. This is all of course due to abysmal time management on my part. I am sure I could have done well but my highest possible grade is now a B-, assuming he deducts 10% for each school day late, or 0% if he deducts 10% for each actual day late. I told my teacher that I am sorry and it was completely my fault, and he said he would have to call my parents as part of his job requirement; this will happen Jan 3. I said okay.</p>
<p>I pulled something similar in 6th grade actually... I didn't hand in a book report & got a C+ for the quarter. needless to say my parents were furious. To make the point my dad forbade eating anything for a month except vegetable oil and vitamins. It sounds creepy but I was glad he did because I felt so out of control and it was nice to have someone care enough to put me back on the "correct path". Also my parents are NOT grade maniacs. Last year I got a B in math for the year and they were not displeased or anything because I had tried. </p>
<p>However now is different because I have signed up for a course at harvard extension school, about which I am REALLY, REALLY excited about! Lately I've been feeling depressed because everything we are doing in school seems pointless and "busyworkish" and this class has been the lighthouse of my mind. I am positive it will not hurt my studies because I think the reason I can't concentrate and do things well anymore is disillusionment with education in general - english is usually one of my best subjects. I've told my mom about this grade, and she said when my dad gets the call he'll probably prohibit taking it and she'll frankly agree with him. How can I convey how much I need this course for "mental/physical health" because I think I do! Or do you think I should not take it and use this as a learning experience? I respect almost all the parents and many students here very much and I would love to hear your opinions no matter what they may be. </p>
<p>Or does anyone have any ideas for study skills and getting motivated and all that...I would really love to change. I have tried limiting computer time but that is sort of moot for projects that require extensive computer use, like the English one. </p>
<p>I pulled something similar in 6th grade actually... I didn't hand in a book report & got a C+ for the quarter. needless to say my parents were furious. To make the point my dad forbade eating anything for a month except vegetable oil and vitamins. </p>
<p>...That is one of the scariest things I have ever heard. If your parents ever tried to pull anything like that again, I really hope you know not to go along with it.</p>
<p>I sympathize with you. If you truly feel excited by the course at the Harvard Extension School, you can make the argument that taking that course will motivate you to do better across other subjects because your enthusiasm for it will carry across the less exciting high school classes. It may of course, not be true for you, but it has worked for my S. Had it not been advanced in certain subjects, he would not be doing as well as he is. BUT you also need to learn better time management. I don't know if your school allows you to substitute the Extension School class for a high school class or not. My S has had to take 9 classes instead of the usual 7 because of the no study hall policy. Fortunately, some of the classes did not generate much in the way of homework, but this year he has tons. He spends every saturday working on assignments for his college classes, even though they are not due until the following Thursday, so that he can have the other days free for high school homework, which is often assigned the day before it is due. He has also had to limit his involvement in ECs. He would not have it any other way, but it is not for everybody.
You have to be sure in your mind that taking that course will help you perform better across the board rather than add another mound of work. Good luck persuading your parents.</p>
<p>If everything in this post is real, then time management is the least of your issues. What your parents did is child abuse. Have they done anything like that since? You should strongly consider talking to a school counselor--your time management issues may certainly be an offshoot of some severely disfunctional parenting. And I'm really concerned that you have internalized this punishment as something that was good for you. No child deserves to be treated like that.</p>
<p>
[quote]
I pulled something similar in 6th grade actually... I didn't hand in a book report & got a C+ for the quarter. needless to say my parents were furious. To make the point my dad forbade eating anything for a month except vegetable oil and vitamins.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>What the fudge?
I would beat the crap out of my father if he tried to do that to me. You need to give child services a phone call.</p>
<p>Get Stephen Covey's book. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Cheap at Goodwill and like stores. or new at 25. Get yourself motivational books. Associate with like minded people. Everything is a mind game. You can win or lose, its your decision and only yours to make.</p>
<p>A little diet starvation is good for you. Wait till you get older, then you'll really know the term of starvation dieting. Have coffee with gentleman who goes on a watermelon diet for 3 weeks in summer and water only one a week every 3 months except summer. Age 97 and walks everywhere. Used to be overweight and heart problems at 65.</p>
<p>marite/itstoomuch, thank you for your advice. The grade will not go on my transcript as I have not finished my high school's "offerings" in the subject. Your son sounds very together...your argument is the one I've used but my mom says that there are only so many hours in a day and I don't want to overextend myself...It's hard to say "But I'm not using them well! My time management is so horrible" and keep credibility. :rolleyes: I guess the best thing to do is work & work to prove that this was an insignificant lapse in which case what am I doing on CC!</p>
<p>everyone else: Thanks for your concern but I consider myself very self-aware (practically a psychological hypochondriac) and if I had any family problems that were affecting me I would seek outside help. The truth is I don't. If you have any advice relating to my original questions (time management, whether to take course) again I'd appreciate it.</p>
<p>Glowingamy, I think you're missing the point others are trying to raise. The fact that you have SO internalized your starvation punishment as to say that you have no family problems affecting you is in itself a very serious problem.</p>
<p>I am very worried about what will happen to you when your parents get the call from the teacher on January 3rd.</p>
<p>My own daughter had time management problems. I worked with her; I didn't cleverly give her fat and vitamins so nobody outside the family would see that she was being starved. Whether or not you will admit it, what was done to you is criminal.</p>
<p>Maybe you can show my post to your mom? Or at least repeat the gist of it? There are lots of high schoolers who take classes at the Extension School, you would not stick out.</p>
<p>Time management: keep a calendar with due dates for assignments. Try to start them as soon as they are given out; do not procrastinate. If they involve research and writing give yourself LOTS of time to think about the topic, research it, refine it, do more research, produce an outline, write your paper. Take for example, the National History Day Competition that is held in early February at the district level. It is not unheard of for students to begin thinking about their topic and doing some research in the previous summer. And yet, they are not supposed to produce a paper that is longer than 10 pages. Obviously, not all papers deserve this treatment, but starting a couple of weeks before a paper is due is not a bad idea.<br>
When working, work steadily. Don't interrupt yourself to IM your friends, download music, surf the net, etc... All of these distractions give you an exaggerated sense of the time you spend on homework and are really counterproductive. If the work is tedious, you can decide to take a break at hourly intervals, do something else for 5-10minutes, then return to your work.
Hope this helps.</p>
<p>My daughter has time management problems too. She also had a meltdown in junior year where she was mentally stuck and couldn't do her work for a week or so. This is because a) she overextends herself and b) she just operates on motivation from doing every thing at the last minute and c) just not too good organizationally. The school counsellor worked with her a bit to map out a plan and she got through it. She's a senior and just got into her first choice college. So I'd say a trusted adult from school would be your starting point. Also realize that it is very typical for teens to have organization and time management problems and not to beat yourself up for it, but instead to look for answers and be more aware about planning.</p>
<p>Starving a child is very clearly child abuse. There is no "if, and or buts" about that. Your accepting and excusing and even elevating that kind of 'attention' is indicative of victim/enabler behavior. I hope you will seek help, and I encourage you to discuss it with your doctor. He can confirm how unhealthy this is physically and mentally. Even do a bit of googling so you will not be so blind to the very destructive behavior your father chose and the possible repurcussions to yourself.</p>
<p>If you tell your teacher about your 6th grade punishment, I doubt your teacher will call home :)...however, you do run the risk of him calling Child Protective Services...</p>
<p>"I didn't turn in my English project the day it was due or even the day after it was due. This is all of course due to abysmal time management on my part. I am sure I could have done well but my highest possible grade is now a B-, assuming he deducts 10% for each school day late, or 0% if he deducts 10% for each actual day late. </p>
<p>Or does anyone have any ideas for study skills and getting motivated and all that...I would really love to change"</p>
<p>If I were your parent, I would track down a local study skills/time management program, and would enroll you in it. I would have you pay for part of the cost so that you'd take it seriously.</p>
<p>I enrolled my S in such a progrma earlier this year, but didn't have him help pay for it. That prevented him from fully implementing what he learned. That's why if you were my kid, you'd also be paying for part of the cost.</p>
<p>If I were you, I'd be making this kind of offer to my parents, and I'd be asking around now to try to find such a program. :)</p>
<p>If you were my child I would take you out for a double fudge sundae and ask you what I can do to help in finishing up the paper. </p>
<p>Our family has perfected procrastination...</p>
<ul>
<li>We are generally seen rushing around filing extensions on April 15 and on August 13, taxes are still not done.</li>
<li>We seem to have switched from Christmas gifts to New Year gifts (post hoc justification .. much cheaper that way)</li>
<li>Once upon a time all credit card companies loved us because we paid our bills just a couple of days late and they had full use of our money plus could slap us with $30 late fines.</li>
</ul>
<p>So I have read many books on procrastination and am now convinced that it has less to do with time management than my desire for perfection. Taxes are late because I am convinced that if only I could find all my receipts, I could take many more deductions than I take. Gifts are late because I am looking for just the right gift for Uncle Bob and credit card bills have to wait until I set up the perfect filing system.</p>
<p>I am not sure I have found the solution but we have finally decided that for most things in life, 90% perfect is enough ... absolute perfection is something I can admire in others but is far beyond my reach. So credit car bills these days are paid on time since after paying I just dump the statements in one big box, label the box 2004 and throw them out whenever I have had enough of the junk. </p>
<p>I think most people associate procrastination with poor time management. This is true in many instances but other emotional issues are also involved, particularly a fear of failure or quest for perfection. Whatever it is, being late on one paper is not the end of your life and one C is not going to make you a failure. It just makes you human. Inspite of my constant struggle with procrastination, I am still muddling through life reasonably well and am even considered somewhat successful by others. </p>
<p>A few tricks I find useful:
1. Break down the task in several small pieces and attack a manageable piece at a time.
2. Not to be afraid. Extra time won't make that paper perfect and even in a few hours you are capable of writing a perfectly decent paper.
3. Just because you were late for one paper does not mean that you are doomed to being late in everything in your life. This cycle can be broken, particularly if you remember how you feel right now the next time you are sliding into procrastination.</p>