<p>One concern of ours is that there be enough of a boarding community to take advantage of the benefits of boarding, and we're looking at a couple of schools with low (50%) boarders. I've read the previous posts on the subject here - thanks everyone - and I still wonder what are the questions to ask that will give us an idea of those intangibles that make a school a successful place for boarders. Assuming that the tours are on a weekday, what should we look for? what should we ask?
I can think to ask about:
(1) percentage boarders, local boarders, how many students are physically on campus over the weekend
(2) rules particular to boarders, such as you can't enter your room during the day on an otherwise open campus
(3) planned activities for boarders on the weekends</p>
<p>I'd like to know about the tensions/blending between boarders and day students, and whether one group is dominant. I doubt if I asked it outright the school would admit to a problem, even if they were aware.
Anyone with experience at a school with a high proportion day students where it worked especially well or especially poorly?</p>
<p>I would definately ask about the boarders going home on weekends. Even at my son's school - which is about 25% - 30% day - a LOT of them are within an hour and do go home.<br>
Ask about the activities planned for boarders on weekends.</p>
<p>I would ask how the school "manages" the day students - if there is a day student "lounge" or lockers, or how that works for them, even though your child will be a boarder. Are day students encouraged to stay for evening meals/activities? </p>
<p>I know my son has said he couldn't tell me who is a day student at his school - maybe if he really thought about it, he might know who he doesn't see at dinner all the time.</p>
<p>Personally, I don't like the idea that boarders can't go to their rooms during the day. My son will quite often take a nap during his free period. Since he gets to sleep later than he would if he were at home, he really needs it sometimes. I understand why a school does it, I just don't think it would work for my son.</p>
<p>I just thought of something else - ask the STUDENT TOUR GUIDE about the relationship between day and boarding students and the above questions in addition to asking the admin. No matter which they are (day or boarding) they will give you a perspective the admin might not and they are usually pretty honest.</p>
<p>Concord Academy does not allow boarders to go to their rooms during the the day. It's a shame, because that school would be near the top of our list for D if the boarding students were treated better.</p>
<p>I absolutely would not consider a boarding school with less than a 70% boarding population. My son was at one with about a 30% boarding population at one point and it was a disaster. The place was totally empty on weekends and many of the boarders were Korean nationals who only socialized with each other. (before someone blasts me for this stereotyping, it is an issue which boarding schools will comment on if asked.....) To have a meaningful boarding experience, it HAS to be a BOARDING school and not a prep school that happens to have a few boarders (i.e Hockaday in Dallas). Go for 70-75% minimum.</p>
<p>When we went on a tour of Concord Academy, the day-parent (only school with a parent) tour guide told us that the reason boarders are not allowed to go to their rooms during the day is because it would not be fair to day students. If a day student forgets homework, they receive consequences. A boarder could just go to his/her dorm to get the homework. As a result, boarders cannot go to their rooms during the day. </p>
<p>If a boarding school has a large and active Parents Association, that is a tip that the day population or boarders who live nearby are very important.</p>
<p>One of the things about being a day student at a boarding school is that you have to be more independant than their boarding conterparts. They need to be more organized and for many, would have LESS supervision at home in the evening than at school.
That said, I understand Concord's policy, but I think it goes too far. One advantage of being a boarder is that you don't have to bring your 30 lb backpack all around campus - bring only the morning classes, or what's before your free period. </p>
<p>In any case, I generally thing the higher the better of % of boarding - although it does depend on how the schools manages them.</p>
<p>I agree with momofwildchild, it's best to find a stable boarding population, unless you intend to be one of those students going home on weekends. For example, both Hun and Pennington in NJ have boarding populations of 30%. I have had families from other parts of NJ consider its boarding program ONLY because they can pick their child up at 3pm on Friday and take him home. It's sort of like a "we can't quite commit to boarding school, but we have no other option in our area" type of decision. In addition to that type of student, the other boarders are from Korea, other countries, and at Hun, 25 of them are PGs, plus a random assortment of kids. Not a bad thing necessarily, but very different from a regular boarding school.</p>
<p>Pennington, which has 7-8 grade boarders have even told parents that they need to be sure to pick up their child on the weekends since it's especially hard for the younger ones on weekends.</p>
<p>So, a boarding school with a small boarding population can work for you as long as you know what you are getting into.</p>
<p>Thanks everyone. This is good information to have. Interesting how much variation there is among boarding experiences. I think I have a good sense of where the issue are. The quality of the experience seems to depend on the composition of the boarding population, the numbers not as much the percentages, and any school policies regarding boarders. I'd guess that the schools each have students handbooks that I could look at for any boarder specific policies.</p>
<p>It really depends school-to-school how the percentages play out. For instance, my school is 50-50 but we are in a small town where most of the teen entertainment is at the school so you will see many day students on campus (or on school-sponsored activities) on the weekend. There are schools that will claim a higher boarding percentage where only the internationals are on campus on the weekend because everyone else is essentially 5-day.</p>
<p>There is some tension in that boarding students are always under school rules and day students are if they are with a boarding student. So, if a day student is being smart about being stupid ;-) they will not commit what would be a school offense (drinking or smoking, for instance) with a boarding student even if it's off campus - I suppose that might, on occasion, affect social relations.</p>
<p>As for boarders not being in their rooms during the day. The big issue is supervision. At many schools most of the residential staff are teachers so the dorms are near empty during the day. It becomes a question of how to know who is going back to nap and who is going back for all the reasons teenagers (since time began) enjoy an empty house.</p>
<p>Lots of great information. My daughter looked at Loomis - large number of day students but it is a large school so I thought the number of boarders would work out well. But when I looked at where all of the students are from, there were a lot from CT - so I worried about the place emptying out on weekends.
My daughter was also interested in Concord but I thought that not allowing students back to their rooms during the day was draconian. My daughter goes back to her room when she has a couple of free periods or on days when carrying all of the books it too much she will return to her room at lunch time and exchange books.
Her school now is 2/3 boarders and 1/3 day and it seems to work out very well.</p>
<p>Son has many day students friend, some invite him over the weekend for games or just simply a dinner. Every time I go to visit him, there are always cookies or cup cakes on the common room table from day student parents.</p>
<p>S is a day student at Loomis. Like many other boarding schools in the area, there are Saturday classes, so the place doesn't totally empty out on weekends. Some schools have classes every Saturday, & some, like Loomis, are every other Saturday. The ratio is about 65 % day vs 35% boarders, I believe. There are also games/matches/meets almost every Saturday, and lots of weekend activities. S spends a lot of time at school -- which is OK now that he drives himself!</p>
<p>Arling - Sounds like your son's school is successful at blending the two populations. Anything in particular that school does to bring that about?</p>
<p>SBergman -Thanks. The scenario you describe is exactly what I hope to be able to avoid. He has a full, active social life now, and he'd be pretty unhappy to feel isolated on the weekends.
The other situations, I think, are somewhat similar to ones we face now and aren't entirely unique to boarding schools. For instance, in some areas, we're more strict than other parents, so our children's friends have to just accept that - even if it limits what they can all do together. Our teens have to make the same adjustment for the parents of their friends. Usually it happens around issues of curfew, driving, or mixed groups. Of course, having the school as one of the parents changes things a bit!
On the other hand, not being able to go to his room during the day would be completely odd for him. He's 15, and he can be alone in our house, with or without a few friends. Our high school, like most, is an open campus, so if he wants, he can bike home for lunch or to grab a forgotten assignment. To the extent his room is his "home" while at school, not having access to it during the day would be a major restriction for him.</p>
<p>Regarding % of day v. boarding students: Since he wanted a true boarding school experience, when we looked at schools for my older child, we automatically eliminated any school with less than 75% boarders, as we felt that it changed the dynamics if it had too many day students. As it was, one school that he almost went to (always listed as one of the "top" boarding schools) had about 75% boarders and even that felt different compared to those with a high number of boarders. Ultimately, he chose a school with 100% boarders and that has worked very well for him. His school has a wide variety of activities (in all areas - tickets to sporting events, arts performances, theme parks, etc./dances/bands on campus, many others...) on weekends. And, btw, they are allowed to go to their rooms during the day if they wish (I thought that was the case at most BS...)</p>
<p>Another thing to consider is the number of boarders who are local to the school. One school we looked at had a high percentage of boarders, but quite a few of them were from a short distance away, and could/would go home often on weekends. This has the same effect (on weekends) as a high number of day students. So simply the percentage of boarders may not tell the whole story.</p>
<p>Emma Willard is a great example of what skidad described. Probably any school that is near a densely populated area will run into these things. In this case, look for schools that don't allow the area kids to go home on the weekends or that have Saturday classes and study hall on Sunday. Many of the ISL schools draw from within 2 hours, but there is often only one "long weekend" where it's actually feasible to go home. I believe Emma has the opposite, there are "closed weekends" when the girls must stay on campus. I only speak of Emma because it is an hour away from me and I have friends with daughters there. They board, but come home nearly every weekend.</p>