Personal Statement help-great story, minor hiccup

<p>I'm writing my personal statement for the general prompt, and I've addressed the three unique labels (ex gang member, first generation student, young father) that set me apart from others. I relate these to my determination, and start to describe all the obstacles I overcame in leaving my past life, and how it created confidence. I end by touching on how fatherhood has pushed me to return to school, and made me determined to succeed (3.8 over last four semesters). </p>

<p>I am struggling with the middle section about my first few semesters in school. They were a GPA of about 2.4 or something. With my current gpa they combine to be a GPA of 3.54. My issue is addressing the poor first 3 semesters I had. I was recently released from juvenile hall, and was just trying to create an identity for myself, but really had no idea what I was doing in college. I think it planted the seeds for success because when my son was born I didn't want those semesters to be the example he followed, and I soon really valued education. </p>

<p>Do you guys think that is valid reason enough for my lackluster start or should I include the financial struggle I had having just moved out, and obtained a job as well?</p>

<p>I don't want them to think I was just lazy, I really had a lot going on. I was young, and dumber than most. I was trying to do what I thought a good member of society would do, and juggled full time hours, and an identity crisis on top of school.</p>

<p>Please help! I'm stressing!</p>

<p>Bump. Any suggestions?</p>

<p>I think what you have is wonderful. You don’t need to pile on excuses. Colleges respect people who’ve turned their lives around. Based on your post, it seems as though you have the introspection needed to clearly articulate your position. I’m sure you’ll write a wonderful essay. Good luck!</p>

<p>I’m also struggling with my general prompt too. I also started off my first semester at community college with a low gpa and have worked to bring it up over the past semesters so I think what you have now would make a great essay. I agree with vassarstudent, colleges respect students who turn their lives around, it shows that you’re hard working and that is what they look for in a student. The only thing I would suggest is to have someone who to revise your essay before submitting it.</p>