Please Grade my SAT essay!!!!

<p>prompt:
For a variety of reasons, people often make choices that have negative results. Later, they regret these choices, finding out too late that bad choices can be costly. On the other hand, decisions that seem completely reasonable when they are made may also be the cause of later disappointment and suffering. What looks like a wonderful idea at one time can later seem like the worst decision that could have been made. Good choices, too, can be costly.</p>

<p>Are bad choices and good choices equally likely to have negative consequences? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>

<p>ESSAY</p>

<p>Yes, it believe that good as well as bad choices could result in negative consequences. The reason is quiet simple. No one could predict the future. Good choices, defined as logical decisions at the time could in fact result in unfavorable circumstances. It is fairly safe to assume that most, if not all, bad decisions result in negative affects. As for good decisions, it is evident through history and literature that good choices could very well cause unwanted results. </p>

<p>The American Revolutionary war was a true underdog story that no one of that time would ever expect. A small inferior group of colonies revolting against the strong power of the time, England. If one look at it from that prespective, no one would be surprised of the actions of Benedict Arnold. His one goal in life was fame and he would do anything to achieve it. At first he wanted to lead a rouge gruop of revolutionary into history, but overshadowed by Washington, he was left with no choice but to defect to the English's side. The promised his a high position as well as proper pay, something that the Continental Congress, was not able to do. For every point it would seem to advance his goal, Arnold had made the right choice. Yet from history's viewpoint, Arnold doomed himself. Against all odd, America broke through as the victor and Washington was glorified as a godlike figure while Arnold was left as the symbol of traitors. </p>

<p>Even in literature proper and well thought out decisions result in unwanted consequences. In Mary Shelley's classic novel, Frankenstien, Dr. Victor Frankenstien wanted to achieve something that had never been done before. He wanted to prove that the old transandentalist scientists were right in their beliefs. He went ahead and created life. He believed he had made the right choice when he was building the being. This was his only way to prove that he was right and accomplish his goal. However when the being was finally finished, the demon, as Victor calls it, stupified the young doctor into deep depression. Also as a result, his brother, William, as well a trusted aide die. The results of the so thought good decisions were devestating to Victor and everyone he knew. </p>

<p>There is no way to decide if a choice is good or bad at the time of the decision. With all the current information, it may seem to be the proper pick, but things change and so do the circumstances. All one could do is their best for a favorable end. The future is not known and life is not fixed. Things alter and so do the reason of the choice. In the end, both a gut decision and an educated guess are both up to fate.</p>

<p>7/12.</p>

<p>You have many grammar mistakes (although it is difficult to distinguish if they are actually typos or not).</p>

<p>Your first body in particular does not explicitly support your stance, not do I think its even historically accurate.</p>

<p>You only have four paragraphs; top scores almost always have five.</p>

<p>here's an example of a fragment: A small inferior group of colonies revolting against the strong power of the time, England.</p>

<p>6 .</p>

<ol>
<li>Although your examples and organization of the essay is fine, the amount of grammatical errors embedded within your essay deviates from your agruement.</li>
</ol>

<ol>
<li>While the ideas are there, the essay never hits any type of rhythm and it was rather hard to read (grammar, word choice, punctuation)</li>
</ol>

<p>I have a question on this topic; if I supported my response by discussing bad choices having positive consequences in one of the paragraphs (opposite of negative consequences as a result of good decisions), would that actually be following the topic question, or would that receive a low score?</p>

<ol>
<li>this was just bloody terrifying, i'm sorry.</li>
</ol>