I do well on tests, and have done well academically but have poor social skills. I often fail to read social cues and blurt out things that land up offending people and turning them against me, even though I have no malicious intent in my heart. I also have poor impulse control. I have worked hard at this, but it is always a daunting challenge for me.
I have had a hard time making friends at school and am often at the receiving end of lot of ridicule and ostracizing in school.
Now I am getting ready to go to college and am wondering what majors and careers are good for a person like me. Are there any majors and careers I should steer away from?
Any parents or students with any insights on this?
I meet people like you in the IT field fairly often. Kept working in your social skills, though. One of my kids is on the spectrum and had to learn to read social skills more by rote than most people would have to. She spent a lot of time watching YouTube videos of people expressing different emotions to improve those skills.
See if you can do interest and aptitude testing through your HS guidance center or local community/tech school. Look at types of jobs for those who do/do not want to work with people at your career center.
Your interests will dictate your major- the types of things you are drawn to/avoid. You are so much more than your ADHD, that is merely one facet of who you are. You could also be introverted instead of extroverted like the majority of the population is. Many people who like STEM subjects choose them. But, if you like other fields that is what you should choose. A research librarian has different interests than a software developer. Both prefer more solitary work even though they do interface with others.
ADHD affects your learning style. It is separate from your interests. The social ineptness is a different aspect of who you are. We do NOT need to know everything about you here. You need to choose fields you actively like. Research them and then decide if the people aspect seems like your preference. btw- son is a software engineer/developer (job title depends on the company). He does solo work but also is part of a team. He is introverted as well. But- his loves are math science oriented. Yours do not need to be.
Work on your social skills. Get someone at your HS (guidance department should have info) to direct you to how to do this- or others at CC.
You are many steps ahead by looking at who you are. But you need to identify more than just ADHD and social skills to find good career fits. Hence the wisdom of testing. Friends and I did it as college sophomores- none of us changed our common major but it did show some interesting facets.
As for possible careers, you would need to consider your own interests and aptitudes. I would suggest that when you get to college you may want to seek out a therapist on campus – he/she may be able to help guide you with some social issues.
Career advice is getting dicey. I just posted here about artificial intelligence and one of the issues/concerns there is which careers will go under because computers will replace humans. I did a few Google searches and frankly it is much harder than I thought to say any career will be safe. It does not affect me. I could retire tomorrow if I wanted but I have kids your age OP and I want to help them as much as I can and saying “I haven’t a damn clue” is not helpful.
As far as social skills the best advice I can give you is be yourself. If you are a geek in some areas embrace it don’t try to fit in with the crowd. Find other geeks and hang out with them. In the end, you will be happier that way. Don’t try to be something or someone you are not. It never works.
I sense that you are somehow blaming yourself for the ridicule and ostracizing that you have suffered at school. It is the people who do this who have the big problem. Please understand that and continue to be yourself. You will most likely find the right people at college. If a counselor or other professional would help you, go for it- someone who helps with “social skills.” But not in the spirit that you somehow need help for something you are doing wrong to deserve this treatment.
You mention ADHD in the title of your post but not the content. So don’t know if you take meds. At many schools there is tutoring or advising or other support available for things like time management. And make sure you register with the Office for Disabilities with documentation of your ADHD so you can get accommodations- many students do.
As the mom of someone with ADHD, my advice is to pick a major and career that you feel passionately about – do work that you have a high level of interest in. Pick a career that allows you to play to your strengths and doesn’t have much of those things you consider “drudgery” or “boring.”
Choosing a career is one of the most important decisions you can make. It takes time to really focus on your interests, personality, work values, strengths, challenges, abilities, hard and soft skills, etc. People with ADHD can do anything they want to do. The idea that there are “certain jobs that are best” is a myth. Work with a college career office or private coach and be honest with them about the challenges that are unique to you. Everyone is different! Good luck!