Please read my essay and share your thoughts.

College Essays
1

<p>What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the university?</p>

<p>MAXIMUM 250 words
Please leave me any things I should add or delete or improvise on, THANK YOU!</p>

<p>It's no secret that no two people withold the same characteristics and qualities.I am positive that I am capable of blending in with the campus community and at the same time making a valuable contribution.
Anyone who knows me well will say without a doubt that I am very persistent and diligent. Anything, I start I put 210% effort and continue to input that same effort
conistently.Whether this be playing basketball, a job interview and my grades. One of my greatest traits is my communication skills. I can easily talk to different people with diverse backgrounds, and
aid them with their problems or academically. In addition to effort and communication, I am an excellent problem solver. If a problem were to occur I would often think before acting.
Most, will simply react like magnesium and dry ice. While on another token, I would take time to evaluate the problem, then proceed to finding the best solution.
All in all,I will do everything in my power to flourish and become a contributing part of the University's community.</p>

2

<p>Cut the first two sentences. Since this is a short answer, every word counts so don’t waste time on silly intros. </p>

<p>Your 4th sentence is confusing, and your 5th is a fragment. </p>

<p>This whole thing needs A LOT of work. You are not spending enough time as you should on making yourself stand out than you are on trying to make this a neat paragraph. </p>

<p>I hope this helps!</p>

3

<p>Thank you! I will take your advice into effect. I’ll start a new essay and post it later for more opinions (:</p>