<p>Visited Groton with daughter and came away less than delighted. She's looking for a small school with rigorous academics and musical opportunities. I thought Groton was going to be the ONE. Truly, I mean no offense, I just could not put my finger on what felt uncomfortable. Perhaps it was the tour, which basically gave us a snapshot of the buildings, as opposed to seeing real classsrooms in action. But I also felt like the place wasn't very "warm". Please help! I would love other parents' impressions of Groton. Should I find some way to dig deeper & if so, how? I know there will be those on CC who will encourage our family to find the right "fit" but we feel so limited when considering smaller sized BSs.</p>
<p>Is the East Coast a requirement?</p>
<p>East Coast is indeed a requirement. However, ThatcherParent, I have read many of your posts & have been quite intrigued by them. In fact, on more than one occassion I have found myself on the Thatcher website after reading your thoughts. However, I think driving distance from mum & dad is still important to us.</p>
<p>@girlprep: That’s what all the tours are like…at least that we experienced. I had the same gripe around this time last year…and other parents talked me off the ledge with this explanation: “Imagine if every day, the small classroom setting you want for your child had to accommodate the disruption of having a new student visitor and his/her parent.” When you look at it that way, the seemingly cursory tours for prospects make sense. Or at least they did to me, eventually.</p>
<p>You get to sit in classes at revisits (for the schools where your child was admitted) in the Spring.</p>
<p>FWIW, we found the Groton students and staff to be very warm, relatively speaking. I would say, though, that if you have an unsettled feeling about any school now, why bother trying to dig any deeper. </p>
<p>On our first visit to St. Andrew’s last fall (before I became an SAS superfan), we felt that it felt like “The Groton of the Mid-Atlantics” based on size and private feel of campus. And also be sure to check out Thacher if the distance doesn’t matter. And Miss Porters if you are open to all-girl environment.</p>
<p>Here’s a link to a write up of our entire process last year:</p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1174214-one-family-s-bs-search-application-process-start-finish.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1174214-one-family-s-bs-search-application-process-start-finish.html</a></p>
<p>Go with your gut. If you have the opportunity, revisit the campus on your own w/ DC. Walk around campus and take in a game. We did this with a few schools we were unsure about. Funny enough, the school that won our hearts was a school we only saw in the rain every time we went to visit.
(the tour, our drive bye, revisit and move in day :))
Did you tour Middlesex yet?</p>
<p>This may or may not be to the point, but I think Groton is an excellent example of this. Are you from MA? Our consultant last year made the sweeping claim that there are some tangible (if hard to quantify) differences between MA and CT boarding schools (both states have so many)! I was inclined to disregard this comment until we toured 2 MA schools and 3 CT schools and I felt it for myself. I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but as a native of MA I’d say there’s a bit more of the Puritan stripe that runs through the MA schools, and with the CT schools, the closer they are to NYC, the more you can feel the urban influence. All of this is to say…there are many other small BS in the area in addition to Groton, in both MA & CT, so keep looking. If you look at several, you may really get a sense for which environment will serve your child best, regardless of name or reputation.</p>
<p>Girlprep, if Groton’s in driving distance, you should also visit other small boarding schools in the area: Middlesex School, Concord Academy, Brooks School, St. Mark’s School, St. George’s School. You should also visit Emma Willard School and Miss Porter’s School. Depending upon driving distance, you could also visit Noble & Greenough, Rivers, and Commonwealth School. (I would normally include Milton and St. Paul’s on this list–are they small enough?)</p>
<p>Most of the tours we took when searching for schools featured empty classrooms. Some day schools will allow students to shadow a student, but as far as I know, you do not sit in on classrooms during a boarding school tour. </p>
<p>Fit is important, but it’s easier to decide which school best fits your daughter after revisits. On the other hand, many of the schools I’ve listed above are very selective. If you plan to apply to four schools, for example, you should choose the schools you and your daughter like best. Once you’ve visited more schools, you can compare your Groton visit to the others.</p>
<p>I’ll also recommend that you look at one or two schools you may think are “too large.” My children preferred small schools, but it may be that your daughter would prefer larger schools. It is time consuming to visit, but it could be time well spent.</p>
<p>For the OP "
“She’s looking for a small school with rigorous academics and musical opportunities” spells St. Andrew’s. </p>
<p>FWIW I am a current SAS parent and from a family of multiple New England Boarding Schools. My Grandfather went to Groton which was on the list when it came time for our second guy but was deleted after the tour and interview at SAS. There is no doubt that Groton is a fantastic school. St. Andrew’s left us with such an impression that has yet to dull on us or him. SAS is a remarkable school led by an incredibly inspirational Headmaster with a dedicated faculty and phenomenal student body.</p>
<p>Please check out the website and the Admissions video. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.</p>
<p>Ok, it’s my sales pitch but it comes from the heart. Good luck!</p>
<p>@ops, given your background, wonder if you (or SevenDad) might have anything to add re: how SAS’ culture differs from NE boarding schools. Maybe it doesn’t significantly, but I would think there must be some distinctive wrinkles to its Delaware location. (I’ve been noting such distinctions in a separate thread about Woodberry Forest, for example). Thanks!</p>
<p>SevenDad, you are fabulous. The amount of detail is amazing & I thank you for that. When you suggest visiting multiple times, do you mean in a formal way through Adm Office? Or alternately, would you do as muf123 suggested, go to athletic events?</p>
<p>BTW…would you be willing to share why you eliminated Miss Porter’s? It’s an interesting & possible addition to Ds list.</p>
<p>@muf123
Like Middlesex size/academics/location but worried too athletic for D. Any insight?</p>
<p>Also, like your suggestion to attend games. Did you do this on your own or through Admissions Office?</p>
<p>@PelicanDad
Very interesting idea & one I will defintiely consider. Thank you for the unique perepective.</p>
<p>Ok, I keep coming across lots of positive feedback on St. Andrews. I am embarrassed to admit that I attended a NE BS & had never heard of SAS. What’s wrong with me?! There are soooooo many of you saying such wonderful things about the place.</p>
<p>@girlprep: Aw shucks. ;-)</p>
<p>We did go through the admissions office for our repeat visits, which were more a product of following up on positive Summer visits/interviews than anything else really. We wanted to see the schools when classes were in session and students were around instead of the relatively quiet summer months. </p>
<p>Some of the school campuses are so large that you can’t really see every building on one 30/45 minute tour (IIRC St. Paul’s is just one that fits this bill), so a second visit allows you to request to see parts of the campus that you hadn’t the first time around. A second visit also allowed us to get some more facetime with AOs — even in an informal, non-interview context. On our second visit to Groton, I spent quite a bit of time chatting with the director of admission. Mr. Gracey had previously worked at Lawrenceville, which is not so far away from our home, and we could talk about river towns and the schools of our area. I found him to be warm and charming, btw. Barbara Eghan as well.</p>
<p>While we didn’t attend any sporting events on our Fall tours, we did try to linger at each school we liked. We wanted to observe the students as they were, just walking around. and not just some prepped and polished tour guide. At Choate, we even stayed for dinner.</p>
<p>Miss Porter’s was eliminated by my daughter, who I think was ready for something other than an all-girls education (her sister currently attends the K-12 all-girls school my older daughter attended through middle school). That’s one of those “fit” things. My younger girl is all about Miss Porter’s when her time comes.</p>
<p>RE: Groton, I agree with others who state to go with your gut. There are many schools out there, so if something doesn’t sit well, why ruminate about it, move on and find the school that you think IS your match.</p>
<p>Following up on your SAS comment:</p>
<p>This is why I am sort of anti-“top ten”/“big name” schools at the start of people’s search process. While the recent thread by MiguelLerdo shows that in some cases there ARE reasons to focus on the “most selective/top ten” schools, I think many people (parents and kids alike) are swayed by the “big names” to the extent that they can’t see much further/wider. (Go Thacher!)</p>
<p>Understand that I had this sort of perspective (HADES or why bother) as recently as a year ago. SAS was only on our radar because A) it was on that initial list someone provided me; B) we are from the mid-Atlantic ourselves, so it’s not a geographic outlier. Further research, a fall visit, and some prodding from “ops” helped move it into the Top 3 for us.</p>
<p>When people ask about SAS, I tell them that it was founded by a DuPont and that it was where “Dead Poets Society” was shot. Those two facts in combination seem to be enough to impress most. And then there was the Henley run this summer…</p>
<p>Finally, I’m going to say something bluntly: Some people think of SAS as “second tier”. Well, SevenDaughter certainly had “first tier” stats going into the application season last year. And was in fact admitted to one of the “HADES” schools. We chose otherwise. That should say a lot about how we feel about St. Andrew’s.</p>
<p>Sales Pitch over.</p>
<p>Good sales pitch, SevenDad. You took the road less traveled and it will make all the difference.</p>
<p>@prepgirl, Yes, we just showed up and hung around the campus. Best days for sports are Wed. and Sat. Also, I didn’t think Msex was a super sporty school.</p>
<p>I don’t know…I think this might be a tour guide issue. Honestly, warmth and community were the three big things that attracted both our kid and his parents to Groton. We also have friends with three incredibly warm and engaging daughters who went to Groton.</p>
<p>My son applied for 8th and 9th grade…when he went back in eighth grade, we couldn’t believe the reception. At least two faculty made a point–completely unsolicited by us–to stop by the admissions office and say hi to him–one because he had noted our geographical location and the other…hmmm, I can’t even remember why. His tour guides both times were SUCH nice, smiley guys. Groton was the only school that consistently and immediately responded to all my inquiries as a parent, large and small. It was the only school where the AO sent my son personal notes after the interview and at Christmas. Cold is the last word I’d use to describe it.</p>
<p>Of course, I’m the person who always argues that Exeter isn’t cold; but in comparison to Groton, it was (SPS was colder, mind you, but I blame that on a bad interview and tour). Note: my kid was waitlisted at Groton twice, so I don’t have any particular loyalty toward the school. </p>
<p>I say revisit…and then, go with your gut. Maybe it was just a really busy day.</p>
<p>girlprep - I really relate to this thread! Yes, the intangible “fit” is everything. We looked at Groton last year, and felt very, very similar things to you. I was very surprised by that, as my D has multiple friends at Groton who are loving their time there. We had expected to share their enthusiasm, but felt the school was so “cold” although I must say that every single individual we met, interviewed with, interacted with was very nice, friendly and helpful. It was just one of those instincts we felt. Also, our visit came the day after our St. Paul’s tour/interview, where my D fell madly in love with the school before even getting out of the car! We did apply to Groton, although SPS was her clear first choice. She was very fortunate to be accepted to both, and although it took her no time at all to accept SPS, I had mixed feelings about moving on from Groton as I felt there must be something that we had missed there, for us to feel as we did. </p>
<p>My older D graduated from Miss. Porter’s and had a phenomenal experience there. She thrived and grew so much during her years there, and was exposed to activities and experiences that have changed her life. I cannot say enough good things about that school! On our tour there, we were allowed to sit in on a class - I believe that is standard practice there, and that really appealed to us. It didn’t seem disruptive to the class at all as the girls are clearly used to it enough that it was no distraction. </p>
<p>In keeping with SevenDad’s statement about going the non-HADES route, or supposed “second-tier” route: my older D had just the same grades & SSAT scores (high 90s) as her HADES sister, yet went with the “fit” of Miss. Porter’s. In no way, shape or form, was she the strongest or brightest student there, regardless of her relatively high scores, etc. My MPS graduate is now an ivy freshman, & feeling that she was very well prepared, both academically and socially, for college. </p>
<p>You are getting lots of good advice on this thread! PM me if you have any questions!</p>