Nice to hear from someone like DS. You hit the nail… He doesn’t play the game. Few of our friends suggested Oxford and Cambridge will be a great fit for him. I’ll wait until he finish his SAT11s. He will do well on interviews as he has a wide knowledge and real interest in science and math. We will check out the US list too. Good to have an opinion from some one else, when we are making a decision as a family. Thank you.
IMO a 3.5 is going to have an hard time getting into Georgia Tech or University of Michigan. However Purdue and some of the others may work.
I have 3 “gifted” kids all three are disorganized. Two with ADHD. Youngest is the worst about turning stuff in. There is a point where all you can do is hope they figure it out. As far as college they may not have to turn homework in but how is he at remembering to do it? If he completes the work on time then maybe it won’t be an issue in college.
BTW my BIL is an absent minded Prof… there are a lot of people that are successful even if they are disorganized.
That is my D. And my husband. You will break your heart pushing and pulling him across the secondary school finishing line, but college can be so much happier if he chooses a college that emphasizes a few large assessments over many small ones.
ClassicRockerDad’s suggest of Oxbridge or UK unis is super on several fronts. First, you study ONLY what you sign up to study: if you apply to study math, you study math- only. No GenEd, etc. So you are only doing work in a field that you love and that you have an aptitude for.
Second, the vast majority of UK unis (esp English > Scottish > St Andrews) evaluate almost entirely on end of year exams (or a small number of large assessments through the year)- imagine if your son’s AP grade was his mark for the course. The marks are broad: although you get a numerical score, your result is listed as a 1st, a 2.1, 2.2, 3rd, pass, fail. 1sts (score over 70% on exam) are a HUGE big deal- you get to wear special robes; a 2.1 (over 65%) is what you are expected to get; 2.2 (over 60%) is just squeaking through; and you will be more likely to be sent down (expelled) then get any of the rest. There are interim assessments, but (esp at Oxbridge) they are to make sure that you are on track, usually not part of your final mark (lab courses excepted).
He has a very sharp memory, when it comes to math or any subject he likes. If he thought anything is not necessary, then it slips out of his mind. He refused to memorize vocab, saying it should be learned by reading books. He will turn in regular home work. Anything out of the routine work, then there is a high chance he will forget.
I didn’t see the stats before. I don’t think he’s in terrible shape. I think you are over-worrying.
In terms of privates, potential ED schools - top schools without Ivy label.
Johns Hopkins, Harvey Mudd, Lehigh (huge boost for ED), CMU, Northwestern, Haverford, Wesleyan
For RD - great schools that your son is a match for
Rochester, Case Western, Reed, Brandeis, Oberlin
I also recommend that while you can guide the search, you really need to let your son make all actual decisions on his own unless there are options that you can’t afford. “Deciding together” is not really the same thing. You’re going to have to let him grow up and potentially make mistakes. You can lead a horse to water…
That’s what I did with my two. I played devil’s advocate for everything and they really had to think through what mattered to them. I thought it was healthy for them and forced them to learn about themselves.
He should go to a school with very few requirements, so that he can take the courses he is interested in and excel in those. As the mom of a son with very similar stats and habits in high school, I had no idea how he would do in the admissions process. I can say that we were pleasantly surprised with his choices when the results were in. Now that he is in college he is very successful and engaged and hardworking. I concur with CRD’s list above.
Thanks for the tips.
I think you are right madamecrabster. Last year, during study hall he would go sit in a class he was interested, and took the finals and passed with an A. He said he didn’t have to do any homework or assignments since he was not enrolled in that class. Too bad for him he didn’t get any credit for that subject, but was allowed to do AP next year. If I’m not intruding, can I ask where your son got in?
I tried to PM but I am not sure I know how, so I don’t know if you received it 
I agree with finding a school with little to no required courses. He sounds just like my brother who now has PhD. I would look at Grinnell.
Awww, not quirky-just a very common yet frustrating breed of boy (I have two)! First (and I say this from experience), reassure him that he’s ok (because we tend to pound on them for their failures without realizing it) and that he can succeed using his intelligence but he does need to learn to compensate for his challenge (organization-brainstorm together or with your school’s help) and that he does need to learn to Play The Game (my oldest once insisted school was supposed to be about learning, not turning in paperwork. Ummm sorry kid!). Find a Uni attached to a school of medicine (more research opportunities) or a Uni associated with a Research/Innovation Park (more research opportunities) to get him involved. Reminds me of the time we were interviewing undergrads for a research position at a high prestige private Uni and most had very high grades. One had mediocre grades and carried a notepad everywhere, taking notes. He asked the most incisive questions of anyone, by far. We did take him on, and I was so pleased that he went on for his PhD. Whatever challenges he faced in school, he was really smart. That intelligence comes through.
Booajo, what field did your brother graduate? Science or humanities?
LOTS of kids like that. (Sure wish I had know that when DD struggled in hs. Her issues were worse… she got overwhelmed and trashed the GPA).
If the 3.5 GPA is on his own, w/o your micromanaging… I would not worry.
This books probably won’t have answers for you… but it will reinforce the idea that you are not alone
http://www.amazon.com/That-Crumpled-Paper-Last-Week/dp/0399535594
Looks like there are many of this breed. My son also says the learning philosophy. He wants to do research, so we are looking for places like you mentioned. Thanks for all your advice.
Boys have it tougher in school. Having said that, I have two thoughts. First, if you think the problem is motivational, pick up a copy of Fiske’s college guide from the library and have your son look through and find a few schools that he might be interested in and check out the stats for admitted students. That may really help him why it might be worth his effort to play the game and turn in his homework and perform the other tasks necessary to maximize his grades. If it is not motivation, but rather an inability to focus and stay organized, I would definitely recommend taking him to a psychiatrist for an evaluation. My son had ADHD and medication really helps him. Before he started, we thought he had a writing disability because his handwriting was so bad. He also pretended he couldn’t read because reading was so effortful. Now, he’s a high performing honors student.
Huh?
Mentioned already but U of Rochester is a completely open curriculum and very strong in science. SAT may compensate for GPA but he’s in the range. Given his GPA it will be important for him to pick his targets early and show a lot of interest in those schools (visit, get to know admissions counselor, do interview), especially his reaches. The yield game has taken over at many schools and they really want to admit kids they can get. Living on this forum and watching the cycle this year with my S, schools are particularly suspicious of high-SAT/ACT kids on the yield game. My advice is to show a lot of interest, talk to department heads when you visit (don’t just do the tour), and stay in touch with them - it makes a difference, esp at privates. Also, try to use the applications to creatively explain away the GPA b/c your son is clearly someone that a top research university would love to have on campus, you just need to let them know why. Good luck!!
Parents, just reporting back. Our Son has been accepted to Oxbridge. I was also surprised how some of the US colleges with less than 10% acceptance rate accepted him. He was bright, confident, did what he thought was right. But how did the adcoms know? He didn’t have a fancy resume. But was genuine and passionate about what mattered to him. Thank you for all your advice. It really helped us with the college short list.
Congrats to your son!! As you just heard, it must be Cambridge (Oxford came out a bit ago). He will love being in a place with lots of people like him 
It was Oxford. It took a while to sink. He liked the tutors who interviewed him and the students who came for the interview. I just felt he found his place.