Read, evaluate and score this essay please

<p>Prompt: is the idealiistic approach less valuable than a practical one?
Essay
The approach employed toward the solutiom of a problem is best being practical than idealitic. This is because a more pragmatic modus operandi, almost always, turns out to be more doable. Examples frm various projects undertaken by various organizations, as well as a personal project, help to butteress this claim,</p>

<p>According to the rules of the G.S.M. market in Nigeria, the average Nigerian would most likely buy a phone he/she deems to meet the basic necessities; a phone with a torchlight to aid one during power outagees which is quite rampant. A company, called Ziteus, once embarked on a project to sell phones that were 'marble-studded' to the Nigerian masses. It tried to incorporate various strategies into marketing this new product like trying to woo customers with the idea that such a phone presented them with class and had never been done before. Unfortunately, most Nigerians needed phones that could do the basic things phone do. They were, not in the very least, interested in luxury phones or phones that brought about prestige, so to speak. Consequently, Ziteus's somewhat impractical approach for garnering a particular market resultes in a terrible loss which it failed to recover from.</p>

<p>Another rather note-worthy example is my otherwise beautiful campaign that seeks to eliminate the use of water sachets by bottling companies. Most Nigerians prefer to buy water pasked in sachets popularly known as 'pure water.' This is because it is somewhat inexpensive compared to the conventional bottled water. I have, in myriad ways, found the idea of water sachets quite unhygenic. It cannot be sealed back like the bottles perhaps if one doesnt finish the water in it. Thus, it bears the risk of being easily contaminated by germs. As such, i started a campaign against it by writing a series of articles and holding press conferences to address the issue. However, the response of most Nigerians wasnt in the affirmative. The average Nigerian lives below a dollar a day and would rather purchase the relatively cheaper sachet water. By all indications, trying ti abolish the use of water sachets without providing a better alternative in terms of cost was utterly impractical on so many levels.</p>

<p>A journal called, 'The TribuneL recently wrote an article on the Informations Minister of Nigeria, Professor Dira Akun. Akun, based on what was written, supposedly said she wanted to embark upon a quest of liberating the numerous street urchins that roam around the streets in the city of Lahos. Nothing can be further from the truth as regard such anoble cause. However, the Lahos sate hitherto fails to allocate adequate funding to education and the development of entrepreneurial skills of youths. How on earth would it be possible to emancipate these street urchins when the required funding is being squandered by politicians? Perhaps it would be doable if this is first addressed.</p>

<p>Projects, be it personal or altruistic, need to be pragmatic enough to be accomplished. Else, one winds up on a wild goose chase. Needless to say, valuable time and effort inevitably end up being completely wasted. Hence, a practical, workable and realistic approach invariably trumps an idealistic one.</p>

<p>I’d go with a 2 (maybe a 3).</p>

<p>Strengths:</p>

<p>+Strong thesis
+Length
+Strong first example</p>

<p>Weaknesses:</p>

<p>-Spelling mistakes everywhere
-Awkward constructions
-Incorrect grammar
-Misuse of words and phrases like “modus operandi.” I started laughing when I saw that.
-Weak 3rd example
-Highly unrealistic 2nd example</p>

<p>First of all, the fact that you cannot identify with the example, in no way, invalidates it nor makes it less of a worthy example. To say the very least, people in Nigeria live in such conditions. America isnt the same with a third world country. I feel u read d essay one-dimensionally and myopically.
Secondly, i think ‘modus operandi’ wasnt misused cause it means method of doing sth. If at all it was used wrongly why not correct rather than act like a superciliously.
Thirdly, i typed the essay on a phone and didnt edit hence the typos.
P.S. : dat u dont understand sth in no way makes it wrong!</p>

<p>Jesus, are a you a reincarnation of Suleyman95? I doubt it, though. At least he typed with better English with you.</p>

<p>To respond to your points:</p>

<ol>
<li><p>Your second example supports your thesis pretty well. It just doesn’t seem realistic. A teenager writing articles and holding press conferences? Sure. Whether or not it’s true, I really don’t care. I only look for how well it supports your thesis.</p></li>
<li><p>Modus operandi (MO) is a legal term that refers to a distinct characteristic (a calling card, if you will) of a person. Indiana Jones has a whip. The Joker (from Batman) has the joker card. I don’t think any modus operandi can be characterized as pragmatic. You definitely misused the term.</p></li>
<li><p>You probably should have made that clear in your OP.</p></li>
</ol>

<p>^ A Modus Operandi is a latin term for “mode of operation”. His use of the phrase doesn’t depend on a distinct characteristic as you say. However it depends on the context in which he uses it. I personally haven’t read his essay, however, Modus Operandi can be used in this way:
He likes to cook.</p>

<p>Or in a criminal investigation, an Modus Operandi could mean the method in which the crime happened. </p>

<p>For example:</p>

<p>“He went under the sewer to hide from the cops” </p>

<p>Which is a method that describes the suspect’s habits.</p>

<p>You’re even more short-sighted than i thought. ‘A teenager cannot hold press conferences or write articles.’ On what grounds do you make such extreme statements? What even gives you the slighest inkling that your English is, at the very least flawless?
What gives you the impression that anyone who writes the SAt must ‘be a teenager?’
How can you not understand how dynamic the English language is?
Modus operandi is a legal as such it is endemic only legal matters? How absurd!
Let me school you. English words can be used in different contexts. English is a flexible.
Would be wrong to say you made a libellous remark because libel is a legal term? I believe you’re the type that just crams SAT words without learning to use them in several contexts. I really didnt want to overstretch this but you’re annoyingly adamant.
Look you shouldnt even have commented in the first place. You obviously are just so opinionated and overly one-dimensional as i earlier said.
I await a second opinion which i very much think will be different from yours.
For what its worth, i’m no teenager!
Desist from jumping into conclusions too lightly about issues</p>

<p>^Uh huh. Sure. I’ll leave this thread alone, then. In the meantime, suck on my 2400.</p>

<p>Thank you so much nothingto. School that individual! He/she, whatever the case may be is just passung mindless comments and claiming to be critical.please read and review my essay. You seem to know whats up.</p>