<p>It was 3:30 in the morning and I awoke to the sound of yelling so I carefully peeked out of my bedroom door. I saw my intoxicated father destroying my mothers PC. That, however, was only the aftermath of the real destruction that happened that night. My father had tried to strangle my mother while in a drunken rage. Unfortunately this wasnt the only negative impact my father has had on my life. Growing up with my father has been a constant battle for my self-esteem and self-worth. As a result of his alcoholic and bipolar tendencies, debilitating anxiety arose which made me so unsure of myself that I came to believe I was incapable of succeeding in anything. As the oldest in my family, I was alternately held responsible for the behavior of my siblings and the quality of his marriage. My family, as I knew it, deteriorated. Independence became a necessity due to the emotional unavailability of my mother and the lack of any contact with my father.
While the structure in my life dwindled, it became clear that my independence would be key to defining my future. The privileged lifestyle I had long become accustomed to would last only as long as my adolescent years and I was going to have to figure things out on my own. I chose not to be angry but instead redirected my emotions into productivity, responsibility and integrity. In the months after the event, I isolated myself. I didnt focus on school or relationships. I became introspective, reflecting on who I was and who I wanted to be. During this time, I reached a mental epiphany. I realized the reasons behind my inability to succeed werent because I was untalented or unintelligent. I had just never given myself a chance to show those aspects that had laid dormant for the majority of my life. I decided from that point that it was time to do just that, show others and myself my true ability.
I have taken all of the Honors classes my high school has enabled me to take. I have stopped believing the people telling me I cant do things because all of them have been wrong. My abilities and my academics have only progressed from this experience and I suspect that if given the chance, they will progress further. I know who I am now and I know what I am capable of doing. I have an outlook on the world that no one else has which has been strengthened from the experiences and background I possess. I am convinced that if given the tools, I will have the possibility of becoming great.</p>